I'll carry you
He was holding a cup of coffee in front of my face. I was holding my travel mug in my hands. He kept staring at me. I took a sip of my coffee and turned my head away from him. The mug was keeping my hands warm. The weather was not too bad, but I get cold very easily.
“Stop ignoring me. I bought you a coffee, like promised,” he said and held out the cup of coffee towards me. I took another sip of my coffee.
“I don’t know how I should tell you this, but I already have a coffee,” I said and pointed at my travel mug.
“But I told you yesterday that I would buy you one,” he insisted. I put the other earphone in my ear and walked away from him. He followed, still holding out the coffee.
“What am I supposed to do with this then? I don’t drink coffee,” he said and sighed out loud.
“Not my problem. I never told you to buy me one,” I answered and rested my back against a wall. I got to the train station at my normal time and I was glad to see that not many people were around. The rush hour had not started yet. It was the next day and for some odd reason the guy from yesterday was here too. I never mentioned to him which train I usually take. He kept pestering me in school yesterday as well. The eyes and attention of other students kept shifting towards us during our breaks. I did not like it at all. I told him to leave me alone, but he was very persistent, like a stalker. If I remembered correctly, I called him a stalker yesterday as well. I really hope that he doesn’t turn out to be one for real.
“Let’s be friends,” he said. A big smile was sitting on his face.
“No,” I replied. He looked around in search for a trash bin.
“I don’t like wasting food,” he said and shook his head after he came back from throwing away the cup of coffee.
“Then you shouldn’t have bought coffee if you don’t drink it. Isn’t that common sense?” I told him. He started laughing. His body was too close to mine. I moved a little bit away from him.
“Why not?” he asked after a small moment of silence between us. I did not want to continue conversing with him. He was acting too friendly to a person he had only met yesterday for the very first time.
“My mother always told me that friends are not needed to survive in this world. All you need is your family. They will hurt, betray and lie to you for their own sake,” I said and took another sip. He leaned back against the same wall as me and looked me into my eyes. I felt uncomfortable by his light brown eyes looking directly at me, so I averted my gaze.
“But isn’t that true with any person? Having a biological relationship or being related by blood doesn’t necessarily mean they won’t do anything bad to you. I think that especially in this day and age you need to connect with people around you. To begin with we are social animals. I don’t think we would be able to survive on our own,” he said and walked towards the train that had just arrived. The doors opened. He looked back at me and waited for me to get on the train first.
The bell rang and everyone sat down. I managed to scrub off the insults that were written all over my desk before our homeroom teacher came into the classroom. I could hear some giggles in the background while I was cleaning but decided to ignore it. Slut and whore were not very creative slurs. I knew it was the group of girls from yesterday who had done this, but I couldn’t be bothered to start another confrontation with some brainless monkeys. It would only waste my time and energy. The class had started, and I was paying attention to what the teacher was saying when a piece of paper flew onto my desk. I did not see where it came from and before I could get rid of it, the teacher noticed it. She told me to open it and read it out loud to the entire class. It was a pain in the ass. I knew if I would try and explain to her that it wasn’t mine, she wouldn’t listen because that’s how teachers were. They just see what they want to see and hear what they want to hear.
“Mrs Ito has the ass of a hippo,” I read out loud. For fuck’s sake. Why did this have to happen to me? I was sent into the hallway and could hear her asking around about who wrote the note. A few seconds later, my stalker walked out of the classroom. Our teacher told us to wait until class was over and we weren’t allowed to talk or move.
“I swear it wasn’t me,” he whispered.
“Just don’t. Don’t talk to me or look at me or interact with me,” I warned him.
“I’m sorry,” he apologised.
“You better be. I really hope they won’t tell my parents about this mishap,” I said and lowered my head. He was going to say something in return but the door to our classroom opened and our teacher was standing in front us. She kept glaring and told us to get on our knees and put our hands on the back of our heads. After class was finished, she lectured us about proper behaviour towards others and continued on and on how words can hurt others. We both apologised and got a cautionary warning as this was our first misdemeanour. I was relieved that the school day ended without any other disruption to my routine life. It was a Wednesday, so I stayed back. I went to the school library to get some quiet and peace. After getting my homework done, I looked at the time. It was still too early to go home. I decided to stop by at a convenience store to get some soft ice cream and cookies. The ice cream was for me and the cookies were for my younger sister.
The sun was going down when I came back out of the convenience store. A red bicycle was parked at a bicycle rack outside of the shop. And next to it was standing my stalker. His face lit up after seeing me but mine instantly dropped. I pretended not to have seen him and walked away as fast as I could.
“Wow, you’re really rude. You clearly saw me back at the convenience store,” he said while walking next to me and pushing his bicycle along.
“I did not see you,” I said and licked my ice cream.
“You’re a liar too,” he said with a smirk on his face.
“What do you want? I think I already told you not to talk to, look at or interact with me,” I said upset. He stopped in his tracks and I kept on walking. The yellow and black stripped barrier came down. The light was blinking red. The train flew past me and the barrier went back up. I crossed the train tracks.
“Ouch. That is very harsh of you to say. You know it’s not good to push everyone away. If someone else was in my place right now, they probably would have gotten hurt by your words,” he went off. He had caught up to me. I turned around to see him on the opposite side of the train tracks. He was standing with his bicycle where I stood a few seconds ago.
“I don’t need you to lecture me as well. I never asked you to be nice to me or be friends with me. Isn’t it rude and harsh to push yourself onto someone else who doesn’t want it? Who do you think you are?” I yelled at him.
The light turned red and the barriers came down again. Another train passed through, but I had already walked off. There was no need for me to get involved with him any longer. He was a nobody to me.