How to Gauge Cuff Sizes (Even I have no idea where this came from)

"Thank you for being with us tonight.

"Yes, the pleasure is mine."

"Let's get right to it. You say you were nowhere near the zoo during the time."

"I know what you must think. How could someone like him have done? I can tell you I did not. the accusations are false."

"False you say?"

"That's right."

"So you didn't steal anything from the zoo."

"That's right."

"Then why is there a panda handcuffed to you?"

"It's a moon bear."

"A moon bear."

"That's right. A moon bear."

"You say this is a moon bear."

"That's right."

"Moon bears are black. This is black & white."

"It's bleached."

"Don't you mean albino?"

"Yes."

"You know that albino mean totally white right?"

"Are you saying he's European?"

"No that is not even close to what I am saying."

"Tell me can people be albino."

"Sir you're going off topic here-"

"Can there be a black albino?"

"Yes there are."

"So can anyone be albino?"

"It's possible but-"

"Can a white man be albino?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"You said anyone can be albino."

"It's a possibility."

"So a man who was black, yellow, or red skin can be albino but can a white man be albino?"

"Possibly."

"But if he is called a white man, how can you tell he's albino?"

"I think that has more to due with skin pigmentation. Sir we really-"

"So how can you tell the difference between a white man who is an albino & a white man who isn't?"

"Sir you are taking the topic far off-"

"If you go up to a white man and ask 'Are you albino?' can he answer you? From what you said-"

Panda eats the tangent guy he was handcuffed to.

"Mr. Panda, would you like to say something?"

"I have a very strict bamboo diet. But I will make exceptions when necessary."