Chapter 1:

Pill #01 - Onyx.

The Magic Pill


I do not know what I’m doing today.Bookmark here

Actually, I don’t even know what I did yesterday, or the day before, or any fucking day ever.Bookmark here

As well as I do not know why I chose to write the main character for this shitpost to fall into the stupid and overused amnesia trope.Bookmark here

Woops, sorry, that wasn’t meant to be said aloud. Ahem.Bookmark here

So yeah, I do not remember anything. I only know that today, I woke up some random back alley, knowing nothing and having nothing in my possession.Bookmark here

Except for a buncha old clothes that I was wearing, and a couple of random pills that I found inside one of my pockets.Bookmark here

I obviously didn’t have a clue what those pills were, but they were the only half edible thing I could find in a 100 meter radius, so I just gulped one.Bookmark here

And then, ohhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THE PLEASURE!Bookmark here

Sparks flew everywhere, though I had no fucking clue of where they had come from, but they’re big and pretty colors so who careeeeeeees!!!!Bookmark here

After a bit there were so many color sparks flying around that I couldn’t see jack shit anymore. But I was too lazy to stand up anyway, so I just waited till the sparks faded.Bookmark here

And then I realized, I wasn’t in the dirty alley reeking of alcohol from before!Bookmark here

Actually, where the fuck was I?Bookmark here

And why did I feel like… I had no arms or legs? O shiet. This may be bad.Bookmark here

I tried to turn around to look at myself.Bookmark here

And then I saw it.Bookmark here

I was made of fucking rocks.Bookmark here

And next to me were weird looking birds and moving plants.Bookmark here

What in hell was this?!?!?! I was pretty sure there was a TV show about this… Or more like twenty… but oh shit I need to keep the amnesia character trait so I’m not allowed to remember!Bookmark here

“Come here, Onyx! What are you waiting for?”Bookmark here

Some girl’s voice called out to me. I turned around and found she was minuscule compared to me.Bookmark here

Her voice could have passed as any girl’s voice to anyone, except that this living pile of rocks I had become experienced a strange reaction to said voice.Bookmark here

If I was human, I’m sure the massive erection I got would have lasted for a century. But alas, I was a pile of rocks, and rocks don’t get massive erections.Bookmark here

Or if they do, I would be very scared and would want to kill myself.Bookmark here

Anyway, so my grey and gigantic body almost moved by itself when hearing that voice. I somehow managed to stop what appeared like a millimeter away from her, avoiding crushing her completely (though in reality the distance between us would have probably fit a few more people but I was too fucking huge to actually know).Bookmark here

The girl spoke again with that very strangely seducing and arousing voice of hers.Bookmark here

“Come, on, Onyx, you know what come snow!”Bookmark here

And then my mind lost the control of “my” – whoever it actually belonged to I didn’t know – body.Bookmark here

By reflex, my body sunk into the earth below.Bookmark here

Immediately, the girl jumped on top of me.Bookmark here

She started rubbing against my body. Why? Don’t ask. How did I feel it if I was a buncha rocks magically joined between them? DO YOU THINK I KNOW, FUCKER?!?!?!Bookmark here

It felt so great.Bookmark here

Sooooooooooooo GREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT.Bookmark here

AHHHHHHHHHHH.Bookmark here

I HAD SOLVED PLEASURE.Bookmark here

NO BETTER FEELING COULD EVER COME.Bookmark here

AHHH, I’VE NEVER FELT SO SEXUALLY SATISFIED IN MY LIFE.Bookmark here

AH, THE PLEASURE, THE PAIN, THE DREAD, THE AGONY…Bookmark here

Bookmark here

I woke up again (it’s been like what, eleven fucking times now?). I was exactly where I had been at the beginning of the day. Exactly where I had woken up, no memories in me at all.Bookmark here

Everything was equal to what it had been. The only difference was, there was one less pill in the cardboard box I had them in.Bookmark here

Bookmarked
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