Chapter 15:

Dog Days

Daigaku Kyuuai no Kuronikuru – College Courtship Chronicle

Chapter 15 – Dog Days

8:00 AM. It was a perfectly normal morning like any other at Saint Rosencrantz’s College for the Intellectually Gifted.

“Like Hell it is,” Maxie argued, breaking the fourth wall. “Today’s the day that I was finally gonna confess my feelings to Kuru Kuroni! According to my calculations, using all of the new information that I acquired during that truth or dare game, there should be roughly a 50% chance that she accepts my confession and reciprocates my feelings!”

Wow, 50%, how… impressive. I definitely don’t think you’re exaggerating that number whatsoever, Maxie. Definitely not.

“But she isn’t here right now,” Maxie yelled, angrily reaching for his mug and taking a sip of his morning coffee. “She’s never awake before I am! Where the Hell could she be?!”

Just then, the door to Maxie’s dorm room burst open, revealing a familiar red-eyed young adult.

“Fuckin’ finally,” Maxie sighed, taking another sip of his brew. “Where were you, Kuroni?”

“Hi, Maximilian-sama,” the girl beamed. “Do you know what dogging is, lol?”

Well, this is certainly… a way to start a chapter. Maxie did a spit-take, covering his study material in hot brown liquid. Was Kuru Kuroni confessing to him? And she wanted to jump straight into sex?! ‘Dogging’, for you uninitiated dipshits, is a British slang term meaning to have sex in public. Maxie had no idea that Kuru was this perverted! Personally speaking, the idea of exhibitionary sex didn’t really appeal to him, but as if he was going to turn down an opportunity to breed with his crush!

“O-of course,” Maxie replied, his face turning bright red. “Wh-why do you ask?”

“Teehee,” Kuru laughed seductively. “Close your eyes, ’K?”

Maxie did as instructed. He had no idea what would await him when he opened his optical observers, but he didn’t care. He was prepared to do anything in order to storm Kuru’s Bastille, if y’know what I mean? Wink, wink.

“Now, hold out your hands, lol.”

As Maxie thrust his hands forward, he felt something small and squishy fall into his hands. Were these… breasts? Kuru’s breasts?! Maxie smirked as he squeezed down on the soft skin. Bastille Day had arrived! But instead of hearing a cute little moan or whatever it was that horny men expected when they groped their girl’s breasts, he was greeted by a shrill scream and something biting down on his finger.

“Ouch,” Maxie groaned, opening his eyes. “You could’ve warned me that you were a biter, Kuro--” Maxie stared down at the object in his hands. Instead of a pair of breasts, he was greeted by some kind of hellspawn from, well, Hell. “…What the heck am I looking at?”

“It’s a pug puppy,” Kuru smiled. “I bought it with money, lol. That’s what you western folks call ‘dogging’.”

“That’s not what dogging means,” Maxie yelled angrily. “Besides, pets aren’t allowed in the dorm rooms! You can’t keep it here!”

“Aww, c’mon, Maximilian-sama! Doesn’t he look cute, lol?”

“It looks like Ichirou Inuyashiki’s ballsack grew legs,” Maxie bluntly stated. “Is it even toilet-trained?”

“I dunno,” Kuru shrugged. “Will you help me raise him?”

“Nope, not a chance.”

“Oh, boo,” Kuru pouted. “Fine, I’ll bring him back to the shelter and ask for a refund. So much for that idea. It would’ve been like we were raising a child together, lol…”

Raising… a child… with Kuru Kuroni?

“Wait, wait, wait,” Maxie called out like the desperate little shit that he is. “On second thought, I’ll help you raise good ol’ Inuyashiki over there.”

“Inu…? Oh, you mean the dog.” (She’s a little bit slow on the uptake…)

“Where are we going to keep that thing?” Maxie asked. “If any of the teachers see a dog wandering around in our dorm, we’ll be expelled for sure!”

“Relax, Maximilian-sama,” Kuru smiled. “Your genius roommate Kuroni Kuru has got everything figured out!”

With that, Kuru picked up the young pug… and stuffed him down her top.

“What are you doing?!” Maxie scolded. “You’re going to suffocate our baby!”

Kuru stared down at her chest. “*Pfft!* My breasts aren’t that big, lol.”

“This isn’t about the size of breasts. Although if it were, may I just say that they look perfectly fine and you don’t have to worry about a thing.”

“You were saying?” Kuru asked, rolling her eyes.

“You can’t keep a dog tucked under your shirt all day, regardless of bust size! It could die in there, or worse…”

“Worse?” Kuru questioned.

“It could soil your perfect tits.” (Truth be told, Maxie didn’t give two shits about the puppy. He was just jealous that the as-of-yet-unnamed canine was closer to Kuru’s bosom than he would likely ever be.)

“You worry too much, Maximilian-sama. I have loads of experience raising dogs,” she assured him. “Every time I killed the family dog, my parents would always buy me a new one, lol.”

Maxie stared at her, his mouth hanging agape.

“What?” Kuru shrugged, sticking her tongue out. “It was always an accident. No biggie, lol.”

“That doesn’t make it better,” Maxie scoffed. “Quite the opposite, in fact.”

-Ring! Ring!-

“Oops, that’s the bell,” Kuru said, stating the obvious. “Gotta go! Don't worry, Maximilian Junior-sama is in good hands! See ya later, lol!”

And with that, Kuru bolted out the door. Maxie sighed, sitting down as he resumed drinking his morning coffee (which was now colder than my ex’s heart).

“I hope Kuroni knows what she’s doing,” Maxie muttered to himself, sipping from his mug and doing yet another spit-take. “Wait a second, she named the dog after me?! That can only mean one thing, right? Right?!

Maxie, we all know what you’re thinking, and the answer is ‘no’. This does not mean that Kuru has a crush on you. She named the walking scrotum after you because you’re her best-friend. Nothing more, nothing less. Get your mind out of the gutter…

(To be continued…)

Kuromaru (クロまる)