The Kimochi Warui Diary
Jotaro looked at me and quietly mouthed, “What the fuck? Brothers?”
So, I’m no expert, but my theory has to do with the word “siblings” in Japanese. It’s spelled with the kanji for “older brother” and “younger brother.” It’s used even if the siblings being referred to are female. Maybe the Brother Sisters got their literal translations mixed up?
After the sake, Jotaro started ordering beers for us. Sure, bring ‘em on.
I’m not a huge fan of beer in the first place, but Jotaro is another story. He’s been pounding down beers like a frat-boy since high school. His friends have told me stories of him profusely vomiting during the middle of a drinking game, just to pick the beer back up and finish it off, all while retaining his expressionless face.
Jotaro gulped down his first full glass of beer, and the Borther Sisters voiced their admiration.
“Ohhhhh!!! Strong drinker!”
They were just two silly old aunties, but all the same, I could see Jotaro taking a bit of pride in it.
He had a girlfriend back home, so he wasn’t interested in female attention—he just liked it when people thought he was a badass. But all the same, that effortless demeanor had gotten him way more female attention in this entire trip! What the hell was with those girls in Mito?
Of course, that was a ridiculous thought to have—but now that it had formed in my head, it mutated into something sinister. I needed to add my own twisted sense of humor to dispel it.
And I knew just the thing.
It was time to unleash my power level:
「ちょっと待って,」 I said. Jotaro and the aunties went silent as I delivered my next lines.「彼はとても強いですよ。アメリカには…消防士ですよ！」
The two aunties looked at each other, and then back at Jotaro. If they’d been impressed by his drinking, the look on their faces back then was nothing compared to now.
「何？」 one of the aunties asked. 「消防士？本当ですか？」
「そうですよ」 I assured her it was true.
And then, auntie number one did something I would have never seen coming—something far better than I could have anticipated.
She stood up and called the attention of the sushi chefs. She pointed at Jotaro and told them that he was a 消防士.
Then, some customers minding their own business on the other side of the restaurant caught wind of the commotion. The auntie interrupted their meal just to tell them that the foreigner in the corner was a 消防士.
Even our cute waitress was told to stop and acknowledge the presence of the 消防士.
Jotaro turned to me. “What the fuck is a show-bow-she?”
Once everyone in the restaurant was informed about the American 消防士, they all turned to face us. They literally got out of their seats and stood up.
Then, they began to clap. That’s right—the entire restaurant stopped eating and stood up to give him a standing ovation.
My mind was blown out the back of my skull. Internally, I was laughing hysterically.
“Shouboushi” means firefighter in Japanese, and apparently, they garner way more respect in Japan than I could have ever known.