Season 2, Episode 21

EXT. TULSEN FARMHOUSE – DAY

A chicken walks past the house.

INT. TULSEN FARMHOUSE, LIVING ROOM – DAY

Shiro checks through the newspaper’s HELP WANTED section. Calif sets the painting she got from Aoyama over the television.

Mi brushes her hair which proves to be difficult. The brush keeps getting caught.

MI: Hey Dad, know any tricks?

SHIRO: You’re moving too slow. Once you hit a knot, pull back up and then push down. If not, try sticking a finger in it to untangle it.

Mi tries out Shiro’s advice. It surprisingly works.

KNOCK KNOCK Someone’s at the front door.

SHIRO: It’s open.

Sadie enters. She comes across Mi doing her hair.

SADIE: Didn’t think you cared about that.

MI: Can’t change my ways?

SHIRO: Sadie. What brings you by?

SADIE: I’m looking for Luegon or Gale. My chickens got out.

SHIRO (folds paper): It has been windy lately. Is your latch secured enough?

SADIE: It’s not the wind. I find footprints this morning next to the coop. Someone’s sneaking in and letting them out.

MI: Don’t point fingers at me. I would not do that to you.

SADIE: I’m not saying it’s you. This is something boys would do. They problem come from the housing behind our place.

SHIRO: That must be new.

SADIE: Fairly. Had to sell some land one year in order make ends meet and they built it there.

SHIRO: What are you going to do?

SADIE: Next time they come, there’s gonna be a funeral every day for a week. They take on step near my fields and it will be the last step they take.

Calif stumbles with the painting. She regains her balance.

SHIRO: Calif, can you deal with that later?

Calif takes the painting and leaves the room.

SHIRO (to Sadie): I might know a way to help that doesn’t involve a burial.

SADIE: How so?

MI (walks out): I’ll go get Kobai.

EXT. DOUGELL FARM – DAY

Around the chicken coop, shoeprints dart across the ground. Kobai examines them. Sadie, Shiro, Tyson, & Mi watch her.

SADIE: Are you saying that she can tell us who did this just by looking at their shoes?

TYSON: Think she can tell us what kind of gum is stuck to them?

MI: Give a few minutes and she will.

SHIRO: Kobai has extensive knowledge.

SADIE: Of what?

SHIRO: Exactly.

MI: The real question is what doesn’t she know? I can answer that. Anybody want to know?

KOBAI (stands up): The number of culprits we are dealing: 3. All boys, roughly in their early teenage years, 12-15, one has a cast on his hand, and one of them was wearing two different shoes. As for why, it’s unlikely they were bright enough to disguise their numbers. Simply put, they are not the best dressers.

TYSON: You got all that from muddy footprints?

Sadie walks to the front.

MI: You should see her with a bedroom.

SHIRO: Can you tell us their addresses?

KOBAI: Show the establishment in question.

The truck starts up.

EXT. LAKE FOREST COMMUNITY – DAY

A modern-day housing community with houses stretching the area and a sign to greet people that’s also the way out.

Sadie parks the truck on the curve. Shiro, Sadie, & Kobai wearing a Sherlock hat get out of the front. Mi & Tyson climbs out of the back.

SHIRO: Yep, definitely new.

MI (to Kobai): Do you think you can find these boys?

KOBAI: The density of this area indicates a 1-in-23 chance of finding the boys in question. Also, it is the closest location from the Dougell’s farm. The only thing needed to reduce the odds is-

BOING A basketball hits Kobai’s head. A group of boys ranging in age from 5 to 16 laugh at Kobai.

KOBAI: I believe now I shall engage in the eradication of some parasites.

SHIRO: Save it for after we find the boys we’re looking for.

KOBAI: 66.6% complete. Two of them are currently laughing at us. One of them is wearing a basketball jersey, roughly 14-year-old, and the other, possibly his lackey assuming he is 12, has on purple shoes.

SADIE (walks up): All I needed to here. (to boys) HEY! I want to talk to y’all!

MI: Should we stop her?

SHIRO (walks to boys): Those boys aren't going to listen to her.

Shiro steps past Sadie.

SHIRO (to boys): Hey, you in the jersey.

BOY #1, the one in the jersey, sees that Shiro is talking to him but Boy #1 doesn’t look like he’s going to listen.

BOY #1: What do you want?

Kobai throws basketball. Shiro catches it.

SHIRO: Does your mom know you’re out here?

BOY #1: What’s it to ya?

SHIRO: Quite simple. I have two angry daughters who would be more than willing to do whatever to all of you in a matter of seconds and I’m here to give you a warning.

The boys just laugh it off.

BOY #2: That’s good mister.

BOY #3: Oooh, I’m scared. They might make us have tea parties.

BOY #4 has a messy hair style that would not be approved by any reasonable parent.

BOY #4: Thanks for saving our dignity, Mr. Mama.

Shiro whips out a pair of scissors.

SNIP SNIP SNIP SNIP Shiro’s tears through Boy #4’s hair. The finished product is a buzz cut. The boys stop laughing.

SHIRO: Now then…

The boys look up at Shiro. He holds two scissors in his hands and looks at the boys with a cold stare.

SHIRO (CONT’D): Where are your parents?

KNOCK KNOCK Shiro knocks on one of the houses.

MOM #1, wearing workout clothes & is clearly Boy #1’s mom, opens the door.

MOM #1: What do you want?

SHIRO: Hello. I would like to talk to you about your son.

MOM #1: What, did MIKEY forget to turn in his homework?

SHIRO: No. My neighbor’s chickens got out last night-

Mom #1 not listening or caring.

MOM #1: Then make sure they can’t open the door.

Shiro does not like Mom #1’s personality.

SHIRO: Someone opened it last night. We were wondering what your son was doing last night.\

MOM #1: He was at a friend’s house. Now goodbye.

Mom #1 closes the door in Shiro’s face.

KNOCK KNOCK Mom #1 opens the door.

MOM #1: What-

KOBAI (in face): Which friend did he stay with?

Kobai corners Mom #1.

MOM #1: A friend.

KOBAI: Which one? What is his address? How often do they rendezvous for such overnight meetings?

Mom #1 attempts to fight back.

MOM #1: Now look, I already told you he was at a friend’s-

KOBAI: Vaguely: You did not give any descriptions, thus, you have not fulfilled the requirements of the question. Also, we asked what he was doing, and you were unable to provide a satisfactory response.

Mom #1 has never met someone as determined & thorough as Kobai. She has no idea how to get out of this.

KOBAI (CONT’D): Now then, what is the address of this friend he was with last night?

KNOCK KNOCK Shiro knocks on another house. Kobai & Mi stand on the sidewalk.

MOM #2, clearly a mother who is easily manipulated by their child by a painfully obvious fake smile, opens the door.

MOM #2: Hello. How may I help you?

SHIRO: Hello. We were wondering if your son had company last night.

Kobai sighs.

MI: Want’s wrong?

KOBAI: She is clearly of no help.

MOM #2: Last night? Oh yes. Ricky had friends over. Are you Danny’s dad?

Mi walks up the sidewalk.

SHIRO: No. I was just wondering-

MI (grabs Shiro’s arm, acts): Dad. I think we have the wrong house. (to Mom #2) Sorry about that. We’re looking for our lost dog.

MOM #2: Oh, a dog. You must be close to it.

MI: Very. Come on, daddy, let’s go ask somewhere else.

SHIRO: All right. Sorry to bother you.

Mi drags Shiro down the yard.

MOM #2: It’s all right. Mistakes happen. Bye now. Don’t be a stranger.

Mom #2 closes the door.

Shiro & Mi approach Kobai.

MI (normal): Ugh. I hope I never have to do that again.

SHIRO: You didn’t have to call me ‘Daddy.’

KOBAI: We had to pull you out. She was of no use.

SHIRO: I know. Don’t think I haven’t seen people like her before.

KOBAI: Though the rushed extraction did help in ending the confrontation quicker.

MI: Great. So we have one mom that doesn’t care and one who is nothing more than his toy. No wonder we can’t find anything out.

KOBAI: And there may be more. Listen.

The place is too quiet. Not even a car.

KOBAI (CONT’D): Father, I propose we vacate the premises.

SHIRO: Might as well. The tires might get slashed.

Shiro, Mi, & Kobai walk away from the house.

INT. TULSEN FARMHOUSE, LIVING ROOM – DAY

The entire household, Sadie, Thomas, & Tyson gather around Kobai. Mayla lies passed out in a chair.

KOBAI: After merely observing the culprits’ stronghold, I can determine that they shall strike again tonight.

TYSON: And what makes you say that?

KOBAI: Quite simple.

FLASHBACK: EXT. LAKE FOREST COMMUNITY – DAY

Still – Shiro asking the boys and the boys laughing.

KOBAI (V.O.): The manners they forgot when dad was interrogating them.

Still – Shiro talking to Mom #1.

KOBAI (V.O.) (continue): The parents being oblivious to their children’s behavior. And more.

Still – Kobai looks back to see the boys sneaking around.

KOBAI (V.O.) (continue): While Dad was talking to the first mother, I noticed the boys from before watching us. Apparently, they have never tried covert operations before.

END FLASHBACK

GALE: And that tells us how?

SHIRO: Simple. It’s like when Mi tries to sneak snacks in her room and thinks I don’t notice.

KOBAI: Also considering the state of the truck upon our return & the fact they we were neither egged, teepeed, or gunned down with water, the only possible answer is because they plan on striking tonight with our guard lowered.

SADIE: Clearly these boys don’t know me.

KOBAI: As far as exact time of arrival-

Calif raises her hand.

KOBAI (beat): Yes, Calif.

CALIF: Was it really that scary?

SHIRO: You know how well Mayla handles scary stuff.

NI (rocks on butt): How about we scare them?

TYSON: Scaring teenage boys? How?

Ni rocks back & forth on her butt.

MI: How about the Halloween Triple Wetter?

NI: Oh yeah- Wait. I can’t use lightning.

MI: Then we’ll add a twist to it.

THOMAS: Halloween Triple Wetter… Sounds like an old prank we used to do as kids.

KOBAI: How viable of an option is that?

MI: How often do people catch on fire?

Kobai gives a rhetorical facial reaction.

KOBAI (walks out): Then let us prepare.

Mi & Ni follow Kobai out of the house.

LUEGON (to Shiro): You let the girls do pranks?

SHIRO (picks up Xena): Halloween is the one time of the year we try to get Xena out of the house. One year, a group of boys scared Xena, Calif, & Mayla and stole their candy, so the others decided to get them back.

THOMAS: How scary is it?

SHIRO: Last I heard, those kids had to buy new night lights.

XENA: They got our candy back.

SADIE: Mind telling us what it is?

SHIRO: Never seen it myself. In fact, only those three know what it is.

Sadie has a dubious expression on her face.

EXT. DOUGELL FARM – NIGHT

A quiet, clear night. The air is still & a new moon darts the sky. Not even a cricket chirps.

RUSTLE Something moves in the corn. The boys from the community sneak through the towering stalks, thinking no one can see them.

The boys reach the edge of the field. They scan ahead.

POV The Dougell house is dead. No lights on. The truck is the only vehicle in sight. No one on the porch.

The boys slide down the edge of the field to the back of the house.

The coop is in sight. The boys ease out of the field. Once in the open, they rush to the coop. One of the boys grabs the latch on the pen.

CRACK A screen door open and slams against the house. The boys look over. No one stands in the doorway.

Boy #3 continues with the latch. Something slippery causes his hand to let go. He feels the latch.

BOY #1 (whispers): Hey, what’s the hold up?

BOY #3 (whispers): I don’t know.

Boy #3 checks his hand. A mysterious, green goo oozes out of the latch. Some sticks on his hand.

MI (O.S.): AH!

The boys look around. A figure staggers over from the other side of the house.

MI: Help… me…

Mi clutches her stomach. Something is not right. She falls onto her knees and lowers her head, almost as if she is about to puke. The boys watch.

Mi moans in agony. The moaning gets louder and more painful, as if something is climbing out of her.

MI: AHHHHHHHHHHH!

BOOM Mi explodes into flames, whaling away in agony as the flames engulf.

The boys scream in terror. A person just ignited right in front of them. They run for the fields.

Ni jumps out of the crops in pain. The boys stop.

Ni tries to hold herself up but clutches her stomach almost the same as Mi.

NI: Run. RUN! Before they- They- They-

Something happens to Ni. The boys shake in the steps.

Ni spits. Flowers grow instantly where she spat.

Ni lifts her head. Moss runs down her mouth. The boys shutter more.

Vines grow out of Ni’s mouth and wrap around her. Ni reaches out in terror, her hand now a vine with fingers.

The boys run for the shed as Ni becomes engulfed by vegetation.

INT. DOUGELL FARM, SHED – NIGHT

The boys barricade themselves in the shed, panting in fear of the sights they have seen already.

The boys check outside.

POV Nothing outside.

CREAK Something moves inside. The boys look around.

CREAK A wheel-barrel rolls to the center of the shed. The boys unable to turn away from it.

The wheel-barrel stops in the center, standing as if someone is holding it.

A flashlight rolls up to the boys.

CLICK The flashlight turns on.

The boys pick up the flashlight and shine it on the wheel-barrel. Nothing stands there.

The boys raise the light up.

Something hangs from the ceiling. The boys raise the light up to see what is there.

The light reaches the figure and goes out. The figure has moonlighting on it. It looks like a person with wings hanging from the ceiling from their toes.

Kobai turns around and gives a peering glare to the boys who have trespassed on her domain.

EXT. DOUGELL FARM – NIGHT

The boys bust out of the shed, screaming and panicking as they run away from the terrors that haunt this farm. They make into the fields, being the last they ever see of the Dougell’s farm.

Kobai, right-side-up, floats out of the shed psychically pointing a pitchfork beside her.

KOBAI: Well, (drops pitchfork) They were more cowardly than expected.

Kobai floats down. A burning Mi & Plant covered Ni meet up at Kobai landing spot. Mi & Ni laugh hysterically.

MI: Oh, that was too good.

NI: That was awesome!

MI (to Kobai): Well, well?

Kobai sniffs.

KOBAI: Five of them now have yellow underwear.

Mi & Ni revels in their victory.

MI: That’s how it’s done.

NI: Booyah!

MI: BOO-Yeah!

KOBAI: Hazza.

Tyson, Sadie, Thomas, Shiro, Xena, Gale, Daniel, & a sleepy Calif walk out and join the celebrating girls.

SHIRO (clapping): Wait a go girls. I was hoping for all of them to wet themselves, but five’s not bad.

TYSON: Now that was awesome. Y’all did this before?

MI: Want to see it again?

NI: Sorry. I used all the seeds in my mouth. That was awesome, though.

MI: Did you swallow any?

NI: No. I’m glad I didn’t. I’d have a hard time getting that out.

KOBAI: Considering the digestive powers of the stomach, you should be fine.

NI: I bet those boys were dying when they saw you hanging like a bat.

KOBAI: I had more planned out, but they were mortified just by me. I feel somewhat unsatisfied.

SHIRO: Be glad you got rid of those boys.

LUEGON: Yep. Scared ‘em half to death, I’d say.

SADIE (heads inside): Well, I’d better go put Sherely up. Won’t be needing her tonight.

THOMAS: You girls were awesome tonight. I can’t thank y’all enough.

MI: It was nothing.

NI: Can I have a chick when one hatches?

Mi flicks Ni on the head.

KOBAI: Just call this neighborly support and consider it a favor for looking after our sister.

THOMAS: Well okay then.

KOBAI: Though considering the number of days in which you have provided shelter for our sister and factoring in the amount this can save you in income and expenses, I estimate we still owe you-

SHIRO: Call it even and call it a night, Kobai. Favors means peanuts around these parts.

MI: Still… you’re welcome.

Kobai observes the moon.

GALE: Now then, shall we be heading home? Someone looks like she’s about to die on us.

SHIRO (picks up Calif): Yeah, might as well.

Luegon clicks the car keys. The lights to the van come on on the other side of the house. Gale, Shiro, Luegon, & Xena head to the van.

MI (to Tyson): See you later.

TYSON: All right.

Mi heads for the van. Tyson, Thomas, & Daniel head inside.

NI: Ko, we’re going. Something wrong?

KOBAI: Tonight’s a new moon.

NI: Yeah. So?

Kobai stares up at the sky. Ni looks up with her.

Kobai walks to the van. Ni continues looking at the sky. She gives up and follows Kobai.

FADE OUT