Stagnate Son p3

Justin hesitated as he tied down the final plank in his raft. It wasn’t large, but it was sturdy. Several logs served as the floor, with planks covering those and slanted planks creating a roof for him to sleep under. Both the front and back were open though, so we wouldn’t get trapped if something happened. He didn’t yet know if it would float, but there was no way it was coming apart with all the rope and nails he had used.

As the days had passed, he could feel Logic’s presence in the back of his mind. A single feeling was being sent to him, a single word.

“Stalling”, he felt from him.

He couldn’t deny it. He had been taking as long as possible to complete the raft up until now. Several sleepless nights had passed, and several failed attempts had sunk or broke in the river. However, today was spawn day so this time the raft had to sail. He didn’t want to be around to hear them again, wailing out in agony.

He grinded his teeth and took hold of the raft, it was time to set sail into that infinite wilderness. He carefully drug it to the shoreline as his ghosts watched. He passed the younger versions of himself and little Logic leapt onto the raft.

“Well is it going to work this time? I’m getting bored.”, he said.

“Some help would be nice.”, said Justin sarcastically.

“I’m literally a hallucination.”, said little Logic.

“You know my Logic has some sense of humor now.”, laughed Justin.

Little Logic scoffed at him.

“I’ve been thinking about our mission.”, he said.

“Mm, that is your job.”, said Justin.

“What is it exactly? We find the spaceport then we win, how is that helpful? Why were we given the nanites? Isn’t this just a test of our Easter egg skills?”, asked little Logic.

Justin stopped at the shoreline as the dancing shadows of the twilight dissipated. He looked up at the sliver of morning sun unveiling itself.

“He thought about that a lot. I figured it was to see if we could protect others, but…”, Justin stopped, knowing he would be interrupted.

“But Tute’s people must have infinite nanobots. Why would testing us with them like this make any sense?”, asked little Logic.

“I started wondering if he was malfunctioning, but Logic implied that we simply didn’t know whatever Tute did. He seemed off, excited even, when Emma thought of nanites. Whatever he’s doing with us, it isn’t random or an accident.”, explained Justin.

“So, is there really a point of going to look for the spaceport? Is that really the mission?”, asked little Emotion as he joined them.

“Well we can’t just sit here!”, whined little Logic.

“And we can’t stay here.”, said Justin checking the sky for the orb they saw at the last drop.

“Then let’s get going.”, said Morcant.

Justin smiled as his ghosts gathered around him and he pushed the raft into the river. It didn’t sink or pull apart as the current rushed by. Little Logic jumped on and danced about, with his counterpart soon joining him.

“It finally worked!”, they said in unison.

“Yea don’t get your hopes up yet kids, we haven’t seen it sail yet.”, said Justin.

Justin pushed the raft further into the river, until he could barely reach the bottom with his feet and leapt onboard. There was a bit of room in front of the wooden tent he built for him to sit on. There he sat with two paddles he had made and watched the shore go by as the river pulled him with it. The raft held its own against the current and remained true and steady as he sailed. A smile quivered on his face.

“This is okay.”, he thought out loud.

“I can’t go back there. I can’t save any of those people. All I can do is look for the spaceport. Maybe, maybe I really can help Tute somehow. Maybe he’ll bring them all back.”, he continued.

Minutes and miles past as he sailed. The river was fast but smooth, uniform as he remained in the center.

“How far should I go? Should I just stop every time I see a vantage point? Should I sail all the way down? Is this a super continent or a regular sized one?”, he asked himself.

He caught a glimpse of bubbling in his path and knew he wouldn’t have time to adjust his heading.

“No, couldn’t be. In the middle of the river? That doesn’t make any sense, I’m sure it’s nothing.”, he attempted to convince himself.

He didn’t hear a thing as the boat passed over the bubbles and the sky suddenly shifted. No, he had moved. It was just like the split second he was awake in his car wreck. One second, he was moving forwards, then dead stop, but this time he was moving straight up. He finally heard the breathing of the beast and accepted what was happening as the raft was flung at the shoreline.

He put his hands out as he and the raft crashed into the beach on the other side of the river. He could feel and hear it completely shatter around him. Tears leaked out of eyes he was too scared to open. Reality had once again become too much to bear.

“It’s okay, we can just try again.”, young Emotion tried to console him.

“Or we can just run along the beach, it would be faster and apparently just as dangerous.”, said little Logic nonchalantly.

“Why?”, asked Justin.

“Hm?”, his younger selves asked.

“Why wont these things just leave me the hell alone!”, Justin cried out.

“Yea that’s the spirit! Kill it!”, little Logic goateed him on.

“No wait! It was just defending its territory, we can’t blame it.”, said little Emotion timidly.

Justin stood and looked up with eyes swirling with hatred at the beast standing on two legs in the river. He grinded his teeth and growled unconsciously as he confirmed it was a Spino. It starred back at him and the wreckage of his raft, emitting a low pitches hiss. There wasn’t any hesitation from him this time, the unfettered rage young Logic held within him for so long was unleashed.

“Drop dead!”, he yelled.

He once again squat jumped at immense speed at a standing monster, but he was moving far faster this time. He was confident there wouldn’t be any reaction from the creature as he arrived at its face within just over a second. His fist was already reared as he launched it and himself through the beast’s skull. He caught what was left of it with his free hand, despite the shower of blood and brains surrounding him, and threw his other fist again, sending the corpse into the river along with himself.

There he sat at the bottom as the current ran past him, sweeping the body away and finally cleaning the stained blood off him. He watched the water and fish swim by as he silently wept.

“Why couldn’t I do that before?”, he thought.

“I could have saved him.”, he continued.

“You can’t ever have been as strong as you are now.”, said Morcant.

He looked around at his gathered ghosts amongst the waves.

“I don’t think this compares but, when I was a kid, I lost our pet. I was too afraid to fight the snake it had found, and sure enough the next day it was dead.”, Morcant went on.

“Sorry bud.”, thought Emotion.

“But as I got older, I was able to kill snakes with ease as I roamed the farm.”, said Morcant.

“Where are you going with this?”, thought Emotion.

“Maybe it will take time, but if you train your speed, strength, and tactics, maybe you’ll be able to protect people someday.”, explained Morcant.

“And how many people will die in the meantime?”, asked Emotion.

“They’ll all die if you do nothing.”, said Yujark.

“Are ya’ll saying I should go to that drop?”, asked Emotion.

“Perhaps you take a group with you?”, suggested Taysass.

“Just a few extra days can change someone’s life.”, said Tacktay.

“No!”, yelled Justin through the water.

“I don’t wanna see that again.”, he thought.

“You said it yourself. You can save more people by finding the spaceport, maybe even bring everybody back. So, let’s try again.”, said Morcant.

“You guys, I’m so tired. I’m so tired of this cruel world.”, he thought.

“We’re here to push you forward.”, said Morcant.

“What if I don’t want to move?”, he asked.

“Then let’s go backwards.”, said little Logic.

“Eh?”, said Morcant and Justin.

“There’s a drop today. Let’s go and ask Tute for a meeting, maybe we can accomplish something that way. Maybe we could get something out of him, anything.”, little Logic continued.

“So, what I just ask the orb if I can talk to him?”, thought Emotion.

“What do we have to lose? We’ve got all the time in the world.”, said little Logic.

“He’s actually got a point.”, said Morcant.

“Ya’ll don’t get it. I can’t go back there. I can’t see, I can’t smell those things again.”, he thought.

“Hey bud what did we talk about?”, asked Morcant.

“We’ve got your back!”, said young Emotion.

“Just turn off your senses and make your way to the hilltop. If we hurry, we might arrive before the bodies fall.”, said little Logic.

“You think?”, asked Emotion.

“Mm, you bet.”, said little Logic.

Justin laughed up bubbles at the futility of it all.

“Fuck it.”, he said.

He swam out of the river and found the mountain on the horizon. Far above a bright light was growing larger, a light he knew was the orb that brought the drop victims. He dashed towards the mountain down the riverbed. He didn’t know what he hopped to accomplish, but his desperation drove him, along with his ghosts.

. . .

It didn’t take long to make it to the edge of the valley. He looked up as the bodies began their decent. Raptors froze as they saw him. He walked slowly to the hilltop, making his intent clear. He wouldn’t make another futile attempt to stop them, his business was with Tute alone. He believed they understood this somehow as they scurried around him, almost ignoring him, but keeping their distance.

There at the top of the hill he lifted his hands into the air and spoke.

“Hey asshole! I wanna talk!”, he shouted.

The reflective orb gave no answers, only a view of his surroundings.

“God dammit Tute! This is ridiculous. Do you really want me to run around for years looking for a building? What will that accomplish? Why am I really here? Can’t we just talk?”, he yelled at the orb.

Only the sound of the wind and whispering of the raptors continued. He grinded his teeth as his face twitched and convulsed. He was finally too angry to cry as he thought of jumping up to the orb. The air around him grew wavy and distorted, as if a great heat was building.

“I just want to talk! Don’t make me come up there.”, he shouted as he dropped into a squat.

. . .

“What are you going to do?”, asked Emidance.

“Nothing, we’re already witnessing progress.”, said Tutelarius.

“You call this progress?”, scoffed Emma.

“He’s grown, and I can see further growth coming soon. The raptors in the area have also changed quite drastically, although I’m still not sure if it’s a coincidence.”, Tute continued.

“Is that what you’re looking for Tute? How far into the abyss he can dive? The difference he makes in animals hunting strategies?”, Emma spat out the question.

“You’re tearing his mind apart! Let alone what you’re doing to the others.”, she growled.

“This is all part of the plan. Also, perhaps you should pay more attention, the raptors here aren’t animals anymore, they haven’t been for a long time.”, said Tute.

Emma’s mouth fell open. She was dumbfounded. She had seen unending evil committed here, but she couldn’t believe this. Surely even Tute wasn’t this cruel.

“No, you couldn’t have.”, she whispered.

“It’s the whole point. Exploring the differences between us and them. Why it’s the very reason you exist. Legion wanted results, so I had to get to work. At first, I was just editing existing races, making them more hungry or feral, but then I had a thought. So, I created…”, Tute explained.

“Don’t say it!”, shouted Emma, looking away in disbelief.

“A new race.”, Tute finished his thought.

“Well actually three to be exact, but this was the only one that showed promise. Honestly, I’m surprised you didn’t notice considering how much time you’ve spent observing your little pigeon.”, said Tute.

“My albatross will bring an end to this madness.”, said Emma, staring up at him, her eyes shaking in fury.

“In due time, he’s no where near ready yet.”, said Tute in a plain a voice as ever.

“He’s trying so hard, but I can’t do anything to help him.”, she thought while looking at Justin through the sphere lens.

“If only he knew where the spaceport was. That was Tute’s only stipulation. If only I could show him what I see.”, she thought.

“But all he can see is the reflection… wait! That’s it! If Tute can deceive and manipulate people, then why shouldn’t I? If it’s for good that is.”, she thought as a wild idea came to her mind.

“Tute?”, she asked innocently.

“Yes doll?”, said Tute.

“Can I look at something?”, she asked, referencing the sphere to him.

“Sure Emi.”, said Tute, watching the raptors.

A wide smile enveloped Emma’s face as Tute gave her control of the sphere’s view, clearly not expecting her plan. She slowly moved it at first, towards the river. She went down it, increasing in speed as she went. Past a great mesa and through a forest filled with red water she finally turned the view to reveal the spaceport.

She saw Justin’s expression change and knew she had succeeded. A wave of relief flew over her. She had finally gave back, finally helped someone. She looked to Tute smugly to find the white in his eye had expanded greatly, almost consuming it. He was shaking, his arrows moving rapidly, it scarred her.

“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?”, his voice erupted throughout their chambers.

She had never seen him express emotion. Was he actually angry? It didn’t matter, she couldn’t back down now, not after watching all he had been through. She stood tall and looked right at him.

“I’ve given him a chance! He’ll find one of my people from the attack force in there with a ship and come to destroy you!”, she shouted back.

“WHO DO YOU THINK GAVE YOU THAT IDEA?”, his voice bellowed again.

“Huh?”, she mumbled.

“Emi! This was all apart of my plan! As soon as you mentioned the nanites I knew it would be the perfect way to develop him. I had finally found it, the answer I had been searching for all this time. He’s been showing progress, if only a little. He needs more time Emi, before coming here. Now Legion knows all about your little friend!”, ranted Tute.

“You… You knew about my people in the spaceport?”, she asked in shock.

“Of course, I knew. Emi this was the best shot we’ve had in all this time. I’ve spent two hundred thousand years waiting for this moment, to find someone like that again. Don’t you get it? You could have just ruined everything! You’ve just jeopardized the fate of the galaxy!”, he continued.

“but, I thought, I thought you…”, she stuttered as she tried to understand his motives.

The white in Tute’s eye shrunk down near a normal level as he stood motionless.

“Legion just contacted me. He knows about your friend. If we’re lucky that’s all he knows, or at least all he can prove. I’m going to go and try to salvage the mission.”, he said as he began to leave.

“Wait, Tute! What’s going on? For once would you explain things to me?”, she asked.

He stopped and turned back to her.

“I refuse to let you in on the depth of our sin. Don’t worry Emily, this time I promise I’ll protect you.”, he said before vanishing.

Emma stood motionless in the void as she tried to piece together the meaning behind everything. Millions of scenarios ran through her mind.

“Emily?”, she wondered.

. . .

Justin’s eyes widened. Although the orb wasn’t moving, its reflection was. It drifted down the river, through vast forests and plains, down to where the water turned red and became an estuary. There it entered what was probably an ocean and there, just slightly to the right, was a large shiny building. A toothy grin ran up to his now squinting eyes.

“Yes!”, he yelled.

“Logic?”, thought Emotion.

“We’ve won! Emma heard us.”, Logic’s voice returned to his head.

“Your back.”, thought Emotion in relief.

“Of course, victory lies just beyond the waters end.”, thought Logic.

“Why did you go?”, asked Emotion as his control brought tears to Justin’s face.

“You already know. Despair is your job. I lost the will to keep going after all my failures. You did to, for a moment.”, said Logic.

“I’m so sorry Logic. The others convinced me to keep going, but I’m just so tired.”, thought Emotion.

“I know. I’m not mad at you, I think you’ve done great. It must have been really hard without me.”, Logic consoled him.

“Really?”, asked Emotion.

“Of course, and now that I’m here to we can finish our mission.”, said Logic.

“You sure that’s what you want? Isn’t this living for someone else? Letting them validate us?”, asked Emotion.

“It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks about it. This is for us, and for the friends we lost here, we all want this. We’ll end the experiments here, solve Tute’s Tide problem, and use the nanites shrouding the Earth and the other worlds to bring everlasting peace. Whether people hate or praise us won’t matter. We all think this is right. We’re all on board and ready to go.”, explained Logic.

“Right.”, Emotion lied.

“I won’t lie to you like the others. I really hope we find a reason to keep going after this, but I don’t know if we will. So, if you still want to finish it when we’re done…”, Logic paused to hear an answer.

“Mm. Even if it’s bittersweet, I’m ready for an end to this mediocre tragedy.”, said Emotion.

“It’s settled then. I won’t stop you this time if you agree to do this. We can have one last adventure to finish things for us. Even if it’s long or bleak, it will be enough for me.”, said Logic.

“I’d like that.”, said Emotion as a teary smile formed on Justin’s face.

“Then let’s get going.”, said Logic.

“I can’t.”, said Emotion.

“Hm?”, asked Logic.

“I don’t want to see them all again, being eaten, being killed. I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to smell it.”, Emotion cried.

“You will if we stay here. We can only help everyone by getting to the spaceport as fast as possible. I don’t think they’ve landed yet. If we get started now, we can make it.”, said Logic.

“So, get up.”, Justin whispered to himself.

His right side lifted, then slowly, his left followed. He looked down, hoping not to see it.

“Good, now let’s get moving.”, said Logic.

“Right foot.”, said Justin as his foot stepped forward.

“Left foot.”, he continued.

“Right foot.”, he said.

The bodies could be heard landing in the flowers and grasses around him. He froze, knowing what would happen next. The tearing of flesh, the floundering of waking bodies, and the screaming began.

“I can’t do this.”, said Emotion.

“Well pull you forward.”, said Taysass.

He saw her feet appear and her hands reach out to his. She pulled at him. From behind him he felt Morcant’s furry hands pushing his back forwards.

“We’ve got your back too.”, said Morcant.

“Right foot.”, he said.

“Left foot!”, he shouted as the sounds of a futile struggle invaded his mind.

Justin drudged forward through the valley of death as he began his journey through an infinite hell.