Heart/Decision

"Woah, holy shit!" Daiya exclaimed, "It's-uh, it's another you! Woah..."

There I was, face to face with her again. She looked exactly the same; that cold stare that emitted from her green eyes, yet this time, there was a hint of sparkle that I noticed. It stood in front of me, unmoving, patient, almost as if she was waiting for me to do something. 

I don't know what it was, but a sharp pain in my stomach tinged upon seeing her. Why do I feel so hollow? That same sensation of drowning ensnared me, like I was back in that tunnel with my feet submerged in liquid. She just stood there, looking at me, while I kept sinking and sinking and sinking deeper in those thoughts. The ones where I wasn't good enough, wasn't strong enough, that I'll always be the same. That nothing will ever change despite my best efforts. I felt hopeless, yet...

"So, I, uh, I guess this is your manifestation? Oh, uh, wow, I-I can't believe it. How many times has this happened?" Daiya asked me, "It's literally another you!"

"This is the second time. Your heart comes out of your chest. It's very similar, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I guess so. Everyone manifests different. So-"

"Everyone?" 

"I didn't mention it, but there was another person in the laboratory with me," she paused, as if she was trying to remember something, "I only saw them in passing. I think they were like us. We locked eyes once. I couldn't make out anything about them except for the scars on their arms, which is why I asked you."

I rubbed my arms upon hearing that, it didn't comfort me in the slightest. The three of us stood in front of each other in silence; Daiya, my body double and me. What should I even say? How am I supposed to react? There was a noticeable difference between me and her even though we were a step apart. What did she like? Why did she resemble me? Where did she come from? That strange liquid...

"Actually, I have a question," 

"Sure..." Daiya replied, interacting with my body double, grabbing her hands and moving her shoulders, but she remained unflinching in her stance. Holding her gaze upon me. 

"Liquid," I paused, "There was a liquid that ran down her face the last time I saw her and it hurt, everything did. I felt what she did. Why?"

She kept probing, opening her mouth, running her fingers through her hair, I felt all of it. The sensation reminded me of those days at the hospital all those years ago. My body double backed away from her and in an instant, she was hiding behind me. For some reason, I didn't move away. I let her embrace me. The touch of her pale skin felt cold.

"Oh, I, I-I am sorry," Daiya stepped back, "I didn't mean to touch you like that. I'm sorry," she looked away and picked up the metal pipe again and started to swing it around.

"Tears."

"Tears?" 

"Yes," she lamented for a moment, pressing the side of her head, "I had a memory, it was like a vivid dream almost. They started happening after I had manifested a few times and started to understand more about it. There was a large room, with desks lined up in rows and kids sitting in each one. They all had different expressions. I was in the dream. I went up to each kid and asked them why they looked the way they did. "I'm sad" "I'm angry" "I'm frustrated" "I'm happy" "I'm jealous". 

She paused, "After that the dream ended. I left it feeling more confused than ever, yet I understood something as well. I could tap into these memories at will if I focused hard enough. I kept dreaming and dreaming, learning more about this disease of mine. Sitting in that white room, day after day, I came to identify these strange feelings of mine. What those memories meant. What if what we feel whenever we manifest are memories of the past that are connected to our powers?"

My body double rested her head on my shoulder and leaned her head against mine. A sense of deja vu washed over me, as if I'd done this before. Was this version of me, a body replica of Reia Ozuma, someone that had memories of the past? Who is Reia Ozuma? She might as well be a stranger to me. The touch of her skin felt foreign, yet familiar. 

"Why is memory so important? All it has done is hurt me." I couldn't stand it, the agony of facing myself each and every day. It felt magnified whenever I looked into the eyes of this clone of mine. A spitting image of all the strife I felt simply stared back at me to see. It hurt. 

"Because..." she approached me, holding her two fingers up and wrapping her other hand around it, "it's taught me so much of who I am supposed to be. Not what those freaks at the Science Department studied or are obsessed about, but me. A human. What is a person, a human?" 

"I don't know."

"Me either, but I know humans produce liquid whenever they feel sad. I saw it on the little boy in my dream and asked him what they were. He told me they were tears and that he felt sad. My manifestation is a heart, an organ that changes its rhythm depending on how I feel. It's not a coincidence. Yours is another version of yourself. I felt something when I met you, like you completed me. There are others like us. I saw one. They called them Experience VI. What if their’s is different too? We can figure out who we are," she paused before closing her eyes.

"Return," she muttered as I watch her heart form back into her chest, slowly filling the crater that was once there. All the blood evaporated and returned back to her, as if it was never spilled all over her body. 

Would figuring out who I am ease these thoughts? Would I understand what the man with the violet eyes meant? Would I be strong and be able to protect myself? Would knowing who I am do something for me?

"Okay, try it," she nudged me, looking at my body double, "You can only use it for so long until you'll tire out, especially since you've never trained."

"How do I do it?" I hesitated and looked back at my body double. I didn't want her to leave. There was something so raw and ugly of seeing her that amplified something deeper within me. Maybe she was me? For some reason, I felt she was a key to understanding more of Experience II. I couldn't rid her now when I finally got her back.

And then, it happened again. 

My body double turned to face me and opened up her arms and embraced me tightly. Her skin pressed up against mine, causing a sort of friction between us. It felt like an eternity that we spent interlocked with each other, neither one of us wanting to let go. In the moment of her disappearance, I heard a small voice, "Not all tears are sad," it whispered, "We'll meet again."

And just like that, she was gone.

"WOOOOOOOOO!" I heard a strange voice come crashing from above, it could only be one person.

"Hahahaha, and so we now know that strange liquid were tears! What a funny name!!" Dr. Vex screamed as he hovered above us, "I think I just found out where Experience III is! Neon train, anyone?!" Dr. Vex smiled wide as he could've.

Well, I did enjoy the neon train. I looked over at Daiya who simply just turned her head in  shame, funny. 

How much more will I learn about myself with these two?

***