Memoria

It all started when I began my first year of high school. There were some familiar faces, but the one that stood out the most was Sakura, my childhood friend.

We had always studied together, and she was always trying to drag me along to meet new people, but it never worked out very well.

In the second week of school, she came up to me with one of her new friends.

"Hey, Hikaru! Do you know Sugimoto?"

"Sugimoto?"

"That’s right, Kaede Sugimoto. Nice to meet you."

I was used to having Sakura by my side and never minded when she got close to me. But when Kaede sat down next to me, I panicked.

"N-Nice to meet y-you…" I stammered.

"Oh, no need to be nervous. I don’t bite."

"Hehe, Hikaru isn’t used to being around pretty girls."

"S-Sakura, what are you saying?" I exclaimed in defense—I didn’t need Sakura reinforcing my image as a shy guy.

"Hey, Sakura, that’s not true. Aren’t you childhood friends?"

"Yeah?"

"Then he’s used to being around you, and you’re a pretty girl too!"

Sakura started blushing, caught off guard by the compliment.

"H-Hey! I’m not that pretty…"

"Don’t you think she’s pretty too, Kikuchi?"

"Huh?"

I barely paid attention to the question; my focus was entirely on Sugimoto's face. She was glowing with a smile and an enchanting gaze as she waited for my answer.

Is Sakura pretty? Well, I’ve known her since we were kids, but I never had a crush on her, so I never really paid much attention to her looks. I’d only notice drastic changes, like when she decided to dye her hair pink to match her name.

But now that I take a closer look, I can’t deny that Sakura has truly grown into a beautiful girl.

"Yeah, Sakura is a pretty girl."

"See, Sakura? You shouldn’t put yourself down."

"Well, it’s just that… Ah… Never mind."

I decided to show some moral support for Sakura with a thumbs-up gesture. Sugimoto got serious for a second and then did the same, perhaps without even understanding its meaning.

Sakura furrowed her brows.

"Ugh… What do you two think you’re doing?"
"… Anyway, we were thinking about hanging out a bit after school. What do you think about coming with us?"

"This isn’t one of those group date things, right?"

I would hate it if it were. I’m sure I’d end up playing third wheel.

"Of course not! We just need someone to carry our shopping bags."

"Sometimes your honesty stings a little."

"And why would it be a group date? I wouldn’t invite you to something like that."

"Sometimes your honesty stings a lot. Way too much."

"… Who knows, maybe you’re just desperate to find a boyfriend."

"Huh?! Who do you think you are, calling me a spinster?!"

Sakura grabbed my ears with a lot of force and started pulling them upward. Pull them off! This wasn’t just retaliation—she was trying to rip my ears out!

"Ow, ow, ow! Stop! Stop it already!"

"Apologize, you idiot!"

"You’re going to pull them off!"

"I don’t hear anything yet!"

"Ow, ow, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!"

We were interrupted by laughter next to us.

"Pff… Hahaha! You two are so funny."

Kaede was laughing at our expense. Sakura eventually gave up her retaliation and went back to her seat in front of me.

"Hmph! It’s not my fault this idiot says such nonsense!"

"Domestic violence. I’m already used to her wrathful ways."

"Haha, I can tell you two have known each other for a long time."

"Well, I guess Sakura and I have known each other since we were kids. We’ve always lived next door to each other."

"Watch what you say! If you tell any embarrassing stories about me, I’ll rip your ears off for real!"

"I just might take my chances…"

"Forget that. So, are you coming with us or not?"

"I don’t know if I really feel like it…"

"Oh, don’t be a party pooper again."

Sakura can call me a "buzzkill" all she wants—I’m already used to her complaints about my tendency to isolate myself from the rest of society.

But this time, she wasn’t alone.

"Come on, Kikuchi, it’ll be fun."

Kaede looked directly at me. For some reason, my heart started beating faster, and I felt my cheeks heating up, as if something inside me was on fire.

I couldn’t tell if it was just my imagination, but I felt like her gaze was getting closer and closer, as though she was about to devour me. I felt cornered.

"Fine…"

"Yay!"
"I told you we’d convince him if we both came together."

"So it was all part of some evil plan…"

When I looked at Sakura, for a moment, I thought I saw a serious expression on her face.

"... Yes! Your presence definitely made a difference."
"Now let’s see… It’s not like I have a ton of money to spend on clothes, and I also need some new makeup…"

"Oh! I know a great store! Let’s go there!"

The two of them started chatting about makeup brands and new clothes, and I ended up completely lost.

...

Later that same day.

I’d love the idea of being on a date with two beautiful girls at the same time, but I felt more like a domestic automaton, carrying bags from one store to another.

After they finished their shopping, we went to a pastry shop because they wanted to eat crepes. I ordered one for myself, and we sat at an outdoor table to eat.

The two of them were chatting away animatedly while I sat nearby, listening attentively and trying to find a chance to join the conversation.

"Why do we even need to go to school? Isn’t it just a waste of time? We have all the information in the world on NeNe!"

"Ahh, Sakura, it’s not that simple. There’s a lot of misinformation on the Neural Network. You can’t just trust it blindly."

"Besides, adults think we teens only care about silly stuff. They probably believe we’d spend the entire day slacking off and getting distracted."

"But if they’re going to monitor us anyway, doesn’t that mean they can see if we’re studying or not?"

"That’s not the only reason…"

My attempt to join the conversation made them both turn to me as if they’d forgotten I was even there.

"Hm?"

"Eh, well, some people say the reason they keep the school system isn’t just to teach us but to keep us under control."

"Control?" asked Sugimoto.

"You know, if we stayed home, our parents wouldn’t be able to monitor what we’re doing, whether we decide to go out somewhere or who we’re with.
By making us go to school, they get a certain peace of mind knowing we’re in a 'safe' place."

"See, Kaede? It’s a prison! He just admitted it!"

"School might be a place designed to control us, but it’s also a way for us to build connections with others.
If it weren’t for school, we wouldn’t be here today."

"Well, you’re right."

"I’m glad someone as cheerful as you joined our class, Kaede."
"It was a lot of fun hanging out with you!"

Indeed, even if I had been "enslaved" by the two of them, I couldn’t deny that I enjoyed being invited out by them. I felt like I needed to say something.

"Me too… I also had fun today, despite all the work."

Kaede blushed slightly.

"You’re both going to make me feel shy."
"But I really enjoyed spending time with you, too."
"I hope we can keep enjoying school moving forward."
"May every day be as fun as today was."

Once again, I felt that burning sensation inside of me. I wasn’t used to this feeling, and I wanted to leave as soon as possible. But Kaede’s shy smile as she spoke those words left me frozen in place.

Over time, we started including more of our classmates in our after-school adventures, but the bond between the three of us remained strong. We didn’t go out every day, but it became a regular part of our routine.

It didn’t take long for me to realize that what I felt for Kaede was love. But I never had the courage to confess my feelings to her. I was afraid that doing so would ruin everything and that I’d lose those moments we shared.

If you ask me why I fell for her, I think it’s because Kaede was the complete opposite of me.

While I stuttered, Kaede spoke with spontaneity. While I distanced myself from others, Kaede got along with everyone in the class. While I viewed the world analytically and a bit negatively, Kaede was optimistic and somewhat innocent.

...

On that fateful day, I wasn’t with her. I was on my way home when Sakura caught up to me, out of breath and with a look of despair in her eyes.

"What happened?"

"Huff... Hikaru..."
"…"

"What is it?"

"Kaede..."
"... Kaede was found dead in the school courtyard. They said she jumped from the rooftop."
"…"

"... That’s… impossible."
"Someone like Kaede would never do that…"

… But that’s exactly what happened.