41 Usagi Days / Ruby-Colored Days, Pt 2

- 41.1 -

R.A.B.B.I.T. didn't like people calling it "Ithaca Station".

The formal designation was: The Research and Acquisition of Battle Broadening Information and Technology (R.A.B.B.I.T.) Compound for Strategic Planning.

Most folks just called it "The Compound", for short. But Ruby still always referred to it as Ithaca Station, both in her head, and around Ivy and Violet.

Ithaca consisted of a large, central atrium, with multiple floors. At the top, a dome-like holographic sky cast artificial sunlight during the day, and a fake starfield glittered at night, as it was doing right now, as Ruby walked through the atrium.

It was a bit like a shopping mall, Ruby supposed—the Usagis had seen plenty of those, when roaming around various suburbs throughout the land. Then again, those had all been abandoned, and nearly falling apart, so Ruby couldn't exactly picture what they'd been like in their prime. But layout-wise, the Compound was pretty in line with what she'd seen in the malls: basically a long oval with a central open area, lined on the sides with residences, offices, shops, and various facilities.

Ithaca had everything you could want. There was even a bowling alley and some restaurants. No ramen shop, sadly—but there was a pretty good okonomiyaki joint that she once went to with Ivy, Violet and Lucy.

The konbini was all the way on the other end of the atrium. There were others scattered throughout the atrium, but this one she was headed to was the only one open at night. It was about a ten-minute walk from her place.

She passed by a few familiar faces. No idea what their names were. She'd never once made an effort to get to know her neighbors. A few of them waved to Ruby, but Ruby put up her hood and pretended she didn't see it.

A bit rude, maybe—but Ruby didn't want to be seen. She hated it. She felt so … visible. Why couldn't Ithaca just be empty!? Then she could make her konbini runs in peace.

- 41.2 -

Ruby's biggest fear upon entering Ithaca, was what R.A.B.B.I.T. would do with the Usagi. She thought they might try to dissect it and perform experiments on it, to try and reverse-engineer and understand the technology behind it. Ithaca was, after all, a weapons research facility, at the end of the day.

But surprisingly, R.A.B.B.I.T. never really seemed interested in their physics-defying kei-car. It sat now, in the lower levels, in one of the testing facilities. Ruby was allowed to go down and drive it, for fun, around the track, as long as she filled in the required paperwork.

Ah, yes. Paperwork, paperwork.

You could come and go as you pleased, taking the funicular system back up to the main gates, above ground—as long as you filled in the required paperwork.

You could use the pool, the gym, the bowling alley, and other recreational areas—as long as you did the paperwork.

You could even apply for an increase on your credit allowance—as long you as you, you guessed it, completed the necessary applications. (You also needed a convincing argument as to why you needed more credits. Wanting more instant noodles was not one such argument.)

- 41.3 -

At about the halfway point between her apartment and the konbini, Ruby had to lean against the railing, and catch her breath.

She'd been having all sorts of problem, lately.

Brain fog. Chest tightness. Intense panic. Even … digestive issues.

They came and went, at random. She could go days without any issues, and then suddenly, out of nowhere, she'd be feeling like she might literally collapse on the spot.

The one doctor she'd been seeing, Dr Black, at the walk-in clinic downstairs, assured her there was nothing wrong. They'd run through all the blood tests, and X-rays, and everything came back fine.

(Dr Black, during the most recent consultation: "Are you stressed out, Ruby? Anxious?"

Ruby: "I don't … think so. What's there to be stressed out about? No bandits. Full meals. No need to worry about getting sick. Everything you could possibly want can be found in Ithaca, right?"

Dr Black arched an eyebrow.

Ruby: "Sorry. I mean—The Compound."

Black: "Well, my prescription for you … is to relax. Take it easy."

"… Seriously?"

"Yes. Seriously. I can tell you're tense, even if you don't realize it. Constant, prolonged muscle tension can explain a lot of your symptoms here. What's bothering you here is completely, in my opinion, psychosomatic. … Ah, 'psychosomatic' means, the symptoms are real, but the root cause is psychological."

Ruby, snapping: "I know what psycho-semantic means! So, what, doc—it's all in my head?"

"I didn't say that. Your symptoms are real—but they're a manifestation of deeper, mental issues. There's nothing I can do for you—except maybe ask you … What makes you happy? I can't answer that for you. But if you know, then I'd suggest pursuing that. Mental health is paramount, Ruby Hanasaki. Fix the brain—and the body follows.")

Ruby leaned over the railing, staring down at the central area below. The water fountain, shut off for the night. Some indoor trees, a few benches.

What makes you happy?

Ruby had never really thought about it. All those years, roaming from place to place, helping random people, delivering packages … Had that been happiness? She genuinely didn't know. At the very least, she had felt alive back then. She knew that much.

From behind her, a voice. "… Ruby?"

- 41.4 -

Ruby spun around.

It was Ivy, a white towel draped over her shoulder, her hair still wet. Probably just coming back from the pool.

"… Hey."

"What's going on? We haven't seen you in forever."

"Yeah … You know. Just … busy," Ruby lied. "Been working on those manga you gave me."

Ivy nodded. (… A bit too sympathetically, Ruby thought.)

Ivy: "Where you headed now?"

Ruby: "Just … R.A.B.B.I.T.-Mart."

"Did you have dinner yet?"

"No. I was … just about to … No."

"You can join us, if you want."

"No, no—I don't want to be a bother."

"How can you say that? You know you're always welcome at our place. We miss you!"

Ruby tightened the straps on her hood. She just wanted to get away. All she wanted to do was go to the konbini, and head back to her room. She muttered, "I'm sorry. I don't … I don't know. I'm sorry."

And she turned to leave—but Ivy caught her arm before she could go.

Ruby, surprised, turned back to look at Ivy. The latter's face a genuine look of warmth. The kind of patience and understanding Ruby knew her friends would always have for her.

… The kind she didn't deserve.

Ivy: "Come on. When's the last time you had a real meal? Violet's making curry rice tonight. Doesn't that sound good?"

Ruby nodded, slowly, unable to meet Ivy's glance. She couldn't think of an excuse, anyway.

Plus, curry rice did sound pretty good right about now.