Ego/Trip

After being trapped behind these brown double doors so long, something about the familiarity of the glitchy landscape felt comforting. It was the same as always. But now, it had a different beat to it. The hum of the buildings, footsteps of those who lived down here, the mindlessness of their movements. The darkness. I could only feel sorry that I had ignored the reality of all for so long. 

"Well, I don't have all day. Let's go," Addison barked at the three of us. "Grab on to me or each other while one of you makes conta-"

"Hold on," Daiya interrupted, "What are you doing down here? You brought us down here and left us in this hellhole and expect us to believe you're just helping all of a sudden?"

"It was my job. Just like it's my job to take you back up there," she pointed above, "Now, let's go. Save your chat for later." She kept eyeing Experience III, then back towards me.

I wondered about the inmates. Did we do the right thing? It was clear that they suffered but what now? Even if they managed to escape, where would they go? And my body double. That icy sensation that emanated from her hands when she ripped that guard's stomach open. I felt it. I felt her kill somebody. I killed somebody. Am I responsible for the actions of her? She was me, no? I di-

"Reia," Experience III tugged on my sleeve, "Are you okay?"

I snapped back to the moment. Was I okay? I never stopped to ask myself that question, so it made sense that I had no answer. "Yeah, let's go."

+++

Instantaneously, we transported back above ground to Nolan-50. The odd reflections of the red surface that reverberated upon the touch still threw me off. I looked up at the vast yellow sky that eclipsed the cherry buildings and wondered how far this world went, or if there was even an end. To know that such beauty was built off the backs of the workers down below...

"This is as far as I go. Good luck. The train should take you as far as you want. I let them know to permit you for wherever you decide to end up." Addison waved us off but before she left, I needed to know something.

"Wait," I stopped her, "Who sent you? Was it Franz? And I didn't see any guards before in any other Nolan, why this one?"

"I told you," she turned around, " Nolan-50 is a checkpoint. Guards reside at every one of them. The next one is Nolan-100 so Nolan-70 should be okay. You're on your own after that."

"You didn't answer my question,"

"Look, isn't it enough that I got you on the train and brought you above ground? What more do you want from me? You want a step-by-step guide for everything? Figure it out."

"But you didn't have to help us," Daiya taunted, "Are you satisfied just being a foot soldier? Not knowing what direction you'll end up, just following orders? Sounds boring to me."

Addison stepped towards Daiya and got in her face, "You especially piss me off,"

"Why cause I'm right? It won't go like last time, I hope you know that." Daiya spouted back unflinchingly.

Addison sighed and walked off, "Just leave. I didn't think I would see you again, so you've already defied my expectations," she turned towards me, "He told me to arrest the both of you and send you there. Wishes of an old colleague of his."

Dr. Vex! So, he did get captured on purpose! I clutched on to the notebook in my pocket a little tighter.

"Wait so-" 

"I don't know anymore. Stop asking. The train is going to depart soon-"

"Why not come with us?" I asked her, "Don't you want to know? He trusted you enough to do that. Don't you think that's worth exploring?"

Addison burrowed her face and opened her mouth to say something, but instead, straightened her uniform and adjusted her cap. "My job is here at Nolan-50. Don't miss the train."

Experience III tugged on the edge of my suit jacket, "Look! The train! It's pink and green! Woah!"

I smiled at the boy. That's right. He's never been up here. I felt the same way when Dr. Vex brought me here for the first time. I did love the neon train. 

Addison took one good look at the boy. She walked over and wiped her hand over his body, changing his white linens to a standard black suit. "You shouldn't stand out too much-"

"Change it back," he said.

She stood there stunned and I barely saw, almost unrecognizable, a faint smile tug at the edge of her lips. "Very well."

Addison changed his uniform back to what it was and turned to Daiya. And to my surprise, she stuck out her hand. Daiya grabbed it and shook it back. Did that have something to do with a bond between two people?

We boarded the pink and green train with the rest of the passengers, and something felt warm about seeing Experience III ride the train for the first time. Who knew a shared event could bring you such a feeling. How odd. 

"She was nice," I heard Experience III tell Daiya.

"Oh yeah, how do you know? She's still mean to me. But I guess anyone can change."

"I heard some of her thoughts!"

"What'd they say?!?!"

"Not telling, hehe!"

As I looked out the window, I saw her standing there firm as ever. Her image faded away as we turned the corner around Nolan-50 on the pink and green tracks. The sweetness of the moment almost made me forget the growing anxiety of what lied ahead for us.

I hoped we would see each other again. 

"Departing Nolan-50. Departing Nolan-50. Next stop Nolan-51. Next stop Nolan-51..."

***