What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger… Unless it Kills You

I don't remember how I got back home, but I was still conscious; I do recall returning at around dinner time, but just walking past everyone and going straight to bed. I think Mother asked me to eat, but the very notion of food made me nauseous.

I was aware of the morning Sun the next day, but I had no intention of getting up. It would take nothing less than a full circle of necromancers to raise me from this bed. And that's not completely an exaggeration, my body felt like a leaden rag doll. Sure, I was aware that Moonlight Guardian would be expecting me, but... Yeap, just going to stay in bed. I could worry about that some other time.

However... "Time to get up, Indigo," declared Moonlight Guardian. She had found me! Yes, I'm aware that wasn't exactly any great feat, but I wasn't exactly thinking straight. I hid under the blankets, hoping she would just go away, but she threw them off and dragged me out of bed.

You monster! Couldn't you just shank me in my bed and be done with it, like a normal masked aberration!?

"Indigo," Mother called out to me, not the least bit concerned that her son was being carried off to the gulags. "Have some breakfast before you go. You skipped dinner yesterday."

"I'm not hungry." I could feel the bile begin to gurgle up from the mere mention of food.

"That won't do, Indigo," Moonlight Guardian interjected. "You need to eat to keep up your strength." What are you doing? Haven't you tormented me enough?

Somehow I managed to choke down breakfast, every bite, more laborious than the last. What cruel torture this was. I can only thank God that there was no green fruit, otherwise it would have taken an exorcist to stop the projectile vomiting.

And thus, day 2 began. It was a repeat of the previous day, minus the initial explanation... and enthusiasm. My legs were like cast iron; the fact that I could walk at all had to be a lesser miracle. I had to think she was trying to kill me. There could be no other explanation.

Moonlight Guardian didn't make me wear weights, but I could clearly see them lying nearby, a constant threat for slacking. On my first attempt of the day, I managed to do better than my last attempt of the previous day, but that isn't saying much as I literally crawled across the finish line. This would also be my best attempt of the day, and my performance quickly diminished from there.

After several rounds, I vomited out the entire contents of my stomach, and then some. This was it, I was about to die or so I hoped. All I had to do was just let go and embrace the sweet release of death. However, to my surprise, Moonlight Guardian came over and rubbed my back. This sudden display of concern seemed completely out of character, but it did wonders for bolstering my spirits. She even wiped my mouth with a cloth that she produced from somewhere. Strange that she would have that so readily available... Regardless, I was taken in by this sudden show of kindness. It occurred to me briefly that I might be suffering from Stockholms syndrome, but I couldn't help but feel affection for her at that moment. That was quickly remedied, however, when she forced me to eat a piece of fruit she also apparently had at the ready. She practically shoved it down my throat... Or insistently fed it to me, if you want to be objective.

And so the days continued with the same monotonous yet highly effective torture, eventually just rolled into one big blur. At some point, my mind had dissociated from my body and just went through the motions. Occasionally, a threatening comment from Moonlight Guardian would snap me back and the suffering would return in full force.

It was during these dissociations that I had time to contemplate my life's decisions.

I clearly shouldn't have bothered the scary lady. I should have trusted my initial instinct and regarded her as a creature that crawled out of Amityville.

I had a good thing going. I should have just accepted the rescue and returned to my normal life. I could be talking to Dawn right now about the value of adding a winch to the village.

What kind of training did I expect from a warrior of superhero-level skill? The Saitama workout?

I wasn't sure which attempt it was or how many days it had been, but it must have been during one of these musings. I don't even remember it happening for that matter.

There was a soothing sensation. It felt nice, cool, and tingly, relaxing away all my aches and pains from all that running... RUNNING!?

My eyes shot open. I should be running! Where was I?

"You are awake." I shifted my gaze to see Moonlight Guardian rubbing something on my legs. I didn't know what it was, but it was the source of that pleasant sensation. And I felt it not just on my legs but my entire body. It was then that I discovered that I was completely naked, save for a loin cloth to protect my modesty; I might have cared, if I didn't feel like I'd been hit by a bus… or several. I saw my mask lying on the ground next to my sleeping pad.

"And here you are again after I had just praised you for going so long between incidents," Horizon Healer's thought came into my head with his trademark exasperation. "But I guess Moonlight Guardian is to blame this time." He picked up my mask and placed it on my head. "That's some good stuff she is using on you. It's made with that fungus you found way back. It has some of the strongest healing properties we know of. Probably the only reason you are awake, and not a week from now."

"Have I been asleep? How long has it been?"

"two days. Moonlight Guardian has been checking in on you and has insisted on rubbing that medicine on herself."

"Really?" I think there might have been a twinkle in my eye as I looked back at Moonlight Guardian. She didn't respond, just moved to rub some of the ointment onto my shoulders. I can't say I have had too many massages, but this felt heavenly.

Perhaps because of this, I suddenly felt like I didn't want to let her down. However, "I don't think I can run today, Moonlight Guardian." I didn't think I could even lift my head, let alone get up. Still, I tried anyway. But as soon as I did, I was pushed back down by Moonlight Guardian.

"Rest." It was a gentle command.

She continued applying the topical remedy for a while longer, but she eventually finished and got up to go. "Make sure you apply this daily. It will help you recover." Before she left, she pulled a blanket lying bunched up next to the bed onto me, straightening all the ruffles as she did so. "Take this time to rest. I will be back when you are fully healed."

Though she was leaving me in the care of Horizon Healer and the rest of the Healers, I couldn't help but feel closer to Moonlight Guardian as she departed. Despite the hell she had put me through for the past... Some foggy number of days, I felt a bond had formed between us. Indeed, I must have been suffering from Stockholm's syndrome.

I spent the next three days recovering. Moonlight Guardian had commanded me to eat, but she didn't need to worry on that front; my appetite had returned with a vengeance, and I wolfed down anything that the Healers placed in front of me. Even the green fruit wasn't entirely unpalatable, which I felt they served too much of, perhaps because it was in season, but I digress.

Though my body was a wreck, I could still use fox magic just fine, which saved me the indignity of having to have someone feed me, as I couldn't move my body. The ointment on the other hand was a different story—it's hard to manipulate a viscous substance with precision. So, Horizon Healer helped me with this for the first day of my recovery. After that, I regained enough strength to articulate my arm, and combined with the hack of using fox magic to handle the more strenuous gross motor tasks like sitting up, I could apply it myself.

Other than this, I slept, and thanks to the ointment's pain-relieving properties, I enjoyed the deepest sleep I have ever had...

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The shrine was by no means large, maybe 3x3 meters. It was simple but elegant, with only a single idol on the far wall. The room was well lit, not by an interior light source, but by two skylights that let daylight through the steepled roof. Opposite the statue, a double door that opens outward was ajar.

Exiting the structure, I was hit by a radiant clear midday sky. The ground however was barren with no vegetation whatsoever. This felt out of place with everything else, but looking around, I soon discovered why. Far in the distance, I saw snow-capped mountains, and the greeny and low floating clouds below. I was on one such mountain, and only then did I notice the snow that had been cleared from around the shrine.

Off a ways from the shrine, on a small rocky outcropping, sat the figure of a man. I felt there was an invitation to join this figure, and that refusing would be a missed opportunity. As I approached, the form of an old man draped in robes staring into the sky began to solidify.

"You are here." The man addressed me while not moving his gaze from the sky. I reached the side of the rock he was sitting on and saw this man had a long white beard. "Come, have a seat." He was moving his mouth and words were coming from it. Was he speaking English? He must be because I understood him.

Seeing no reason to refuse his offer, I hopped on the boulder beside him. Waiting for him to say something, I stared at the ground beneath me, observing the various patterns and shapes made by the cracks and fissures in the rock. If you looked at them correctly, you could assemble numerous images: a grasping hand, a broken hammer, a grinning demon...

"Do you see anything you like down there?"

"Umm... No, not really." The old man continued to stare at the sky without breaking sight. "...If you don't mind me asking, what are you looking at?"

"The sky of course!" I looked back to the sky, reaffirming it was just a clear sunny day. Only...

"Where is the Sun?"

"Where it's always been."

"But it's not in the sky..."

"Are you sure about that? Maybe you are not at the right vantage point to see it?"

"The only time you wouldn't be able to see the Sun on a clear day is at night!"

"And why do you assume it is day?"

"Because it is bright out, and the sky is blue!" I felt myself drifting into a nonsensical argument.

"And yet, the Sun is nowhere to be found." That gave me pause. How was it so bright if there was no Sun?

"So where is this light coming from...?"

"Light isn't what gives you vision here, it is your ability to see." I didn't understand. "You are very good at seeing what is, but lacking at seeing what could be." Wait, was he saying I had no foresight!? "It's not a criticism, it is a trait shared by nearly all mortal creatures." I still felt like he was being condescending.

"Then what do you see?" I said in a huff, crossing my arms.

"Turbulent skies." Until that statement, his words had been relaxed and calm, but this statement belied a foreboding. A wisp of anxiety passed through me.

"What do you mean?"

"It was wise to seek Moonlight Guardians tutelage." Moonlight Guardian...? Isn't she...

He stroked his beard, and for the first time looked at me, "By the way, how have you liked it here?"

I awoke with a start, and my brain began its context switch, swapping out the dream for waking knowledge into my working memory. What a strange dream. If I didn't know better, I might think it was trying to tell me something. But I didn't put any stock into that woo-woo stuff, and I say that fully aware that I am a psychic (fox/cat)-like creature.

I had just finished my third night and found the sun was bright. A perfect complement to how I felt. The last of the aches had gone, and the blisters on my feet had healed. I got out of bed and felt lighter than I could ever remember; I guess Moonlight Guardian's training did have some effect...

Horizon Healer gave me a once-over before giving me a clean bill of health. Before I went I got to eat one last meal at the clinic. It was quite tasty and was the perfect complement to what was shaping up to be an ideal day. With a full belly, I thanked Horizon Healer for his bedside manor and turned to the door only to find...

"You have made a full recovery." Moonlight Guardian was leaning next to the door. Had she been keeping tabs on me? I guess that came as no surprise, but I did find it curious that she knew so quickly that I was back up to par.

I was a little nervous, I hadn't steeled myself yet. "Yes, I am good now." However, I had decided I was going to take this seriously. Life wasn't all fun and games.

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Once again, we found ourselves at the starting point on that first platform. However, this time, I felt confident. Now that I had a chance to move around more than in the clinic, I could tell that not only had my legs become stronger, but also my cardiovascular system; I felt like I could sprint around town indefinitely like a video game character and never tire.

"Alright, Indigo, you are familiar with the route," Moonlight Guardian said, indicating we would pick up where we left off.

"That I am." I could feel the grin creep across my face; I had this!

"Good, this time, you will run it in half the time." She said it so casually...

I looked at her, pleading for clemency; You were so kind to me back at the clinic. She ignored me and began to wind the clock. Of course, monsters don't grant reprieves. "And start."

I took off running full throttle. This would be my only chance. The only hope I had was to get it the first time, while I still was completely fresh. If I failed, it would be a repeat of last time.

I put everything I had into this run. Inspired by my assistive use of fox magic to aid in gross motor movements back at the Healer's den, I used fox magic to propel me even faster. I thought it might be cheating, but even with it, my chances of success were doubtful, and without it, impossible. So it was the only choice.

I could rocket using this trick, but I soon realized I had to throttle back on the fox magic if I wanted to sustain it over the entire course. Even still, it greatly increased my speed. It was a shame really, I might have enjoyed speeding through the village, watching everyone pass as a blur as they expressed startled reactions, but with the knowledge of what failure entailed, I could not.

The course streaked by, and before I knew it, I was nearing the finish line. On the way back down, I renewed the effort and pushed the pace, ignoring all pain. On the last stretch, I saw Moonlight Guardian looking at the watch. Did that mean I still had time? I disabled the governor and somehow managed to scrape out just a bit more speed at no small expense to my body. I powered across the finish line and collapsed. She must have grabbed me with fox magic to stop me from falling off the platform.

Though I felt like I had zero ATP left, I still managed to turn my head to face Moonlight Guardian. I prayed to the Deity that I had made it.

"...Again."

If Thanatos himself had just shown up before me, the color could not have drained out of me more. To the contrary, his visit would be a welcomed diversion. Still, acting purely on the subconscious habit hammered into me over the past iterations, I got up and began to run again. However...

I fell flat on my face as something grabbed me by the tail. I turned back to find Moonlight Guardian holding me. "That will be enough." Needless to say, I was more than confused, probably only exacerbated by the fact that I had no calories to spare for nonessential brain functions.

"But don't I need to finish on time?"

"Truth be told, you did finish on time." She let go of my tail. "I didn't expect you to."

I stared at her; I might have been more forceful in my demand for answers, but I was exhausted both physically and spiritually.

"I expected you to put everything you had into that run, knowing you would be completely exhausted," she explained. "After you failed, I needed to know that you would not lose heart and continue, though you kind of messed that up by actually succeeding."

"But if I didn't make it that first time, there would be no hope of success in further attempts."

"That is the test of fortitude." I must have frowned. She never had any expectation of success. "Though I am impressed that you used fox magic to aid you."

"I would have had no chance without it..."

"Still, I needed to see that you would not give up." She turned her head and looked off. "Honestly, as long as you gave it your all and didn't quit, I intended to end this exercise here."

After hearing this explanation, I felt like someone was vigorously striking flint on steel, desperately trying to start a raging fire of anger at this injustice, but there was no fuel to catch.

Moonlight Guardian helped me to my feet and patted me on the shoulders. "Take the rest of the day off." Well, that was news. I felt pretty banged up, but I could still probably enjoy it. "We will begin the second stage of conditioning tomorrow."

My swallow was audible.