Are you a bloody lunatic?

“House Edelweiss? They’s a pretty big deal, ain't they?” I asked, trying to hide the waver in my voice.

“Ye must be from kwyte þe ways away, I suppose. þough I had presumed as much from youre queer manner a' speech. Aye, House Edelweiss be, as ye sayest, a ‘big deal.’ þey retane lordship o'er much of þe souþ, as þey haþ for many a year. I’ve served under Lord Edwyn Edelweiss for as long as I’ve been a working man. Brilliant man wiþ a brilliant mynd, my lord ys.”

“I see…”

I tried to steady my nerves, but it was setting in more and more that this situation was about as bad as it could possibly be. If the old man had worked under her family for that long, there’s no way he wouldn’t recognise Alice’s face if he saw it. It was far too late to turn him away now, all I could do was hope Alice would stay still in her sleep.

“Actually, news reached myne ears this day þat milord haþ found himself in a spot of boþer,” the man said suddenly.

“Oh? Pray tell, woulja?” News shouldn’t travel too fast in this world, so I had to ascertain whether he knew about Alice’s situation or not.

“A colleague of myne passed by me along þe road. He informed me þat þe young lady Alice Elizabeþ Edelweiss, þe Lord’s only progeny, disappeared from her home late upon yester even. I suppose not þat ye young travellers haþ happened upon a young lady along þe road?” He asked, confirming exactly what I hoped he wouldn’t.

“Your mate was the people trader in a cart like your one, right? 'e asked us the same thing earlier today. Sorry, mate, but the roads been empty s'far as I’ve seen. Doubt anyone but us is enough of a nutter to walk this road on foot in the stormy season. ‘specially not on 'er own”

“...I spoke naught about her travelling on foot. Nor alone.” The man took his eyes away from the fire and looked me up and down, and I felt myself break out into a nervous sweat. “Wouldst it not be most obvyous to assumest þe young lady of an affluent house to moveþ on horseback? Much as one would expect a traveller family to do, might I add?”

“I-uh-we-I…” I broke out into a stutter, panicking completely. “Wha-when the other chap asked us about it earlier, 'e said she ran away on foot, obviously. That’s why I knew.”

Even if the excuse was good enough, it was clear that my panicked state did not convince him. The dull glow of flame bathed his face in a yellow light, and the sight struck me with fear.

“Who art ye, truly? And who be'þ under þat cloak? Answer me honestly, boy. I’ll abyde no further deceit.”

“I-what reason would I have to lie?”

“What reason indeed?”

He rose to his feet and drew a concealed dagger from his sleeve, aiming for my neck with a swipe much faster than one would expect from an aged man. I threw myself backwards and narrowly avoided a fatal cut, though the blade nicked my chin and drew blood. I scrambled to grab Alice’s sword, while the man moved his attention from me to her, rolling her over and seeing her face.

“‘Tis as I þought. Why ys a nameless forenner travelling wiþ þe young lady of þe house?” He said, pointing the dagger at me.

“Her dad, he… he tried to lock 'er up for speakin' out against 'im. She’s 'ere 'cause she escaped. If you take her back now, he’ll just chuck 'er in prison and let 'er rot.”

“Aye, I know of þe sercumstances. ‘Twas not þe girl, but ye þat I asked about. What bisness hast ye wiþ þe young lady?”

“She saved me life along the road. I decided I'd repay 'er that.”

“And ye wishest to do so by protecting her here and now, ys þat it? A fool ye art. I can tell simply by syte þat ye’ve held not a single sword in yourr life. Ye will achieve naught here but to rase þe deaþ toll from one to two.”

“Death toll? That’s your lord’s daughter, you can’t be plannin' to kill 'er?!”

“þe young lady haþ been a þorn in her faþers syde for long enouf. Myne orders be to capture or dispose of her whichever way I deem fit.”

“You can’t be serious?! You really expect me to just let you kill 'er in front of me? Are you a bloody lunatic?!”

“A pity þat ye knowest not what ys best for ye. þough it bringeþ me no joy, I will stryke ye down in þe name of my master, þe Lord Edwyn Amadeus Edelwei- argh-!”

His declaration was cut off by a short gasp of pain, followed by him falling to the ground and desperately gripping his bleeding leg.

“I have heard kwyte enough, Ulric.” The voice came from the girl I had thought to be sleeping, rising to her feet and looking down upon the pathetic man in front of her. “I should have expected noþing less from a treacherous weasel such as þyself.”

“You… whelp! Ye cut me!”

“Complane not, thou rotten man. I avoided þy vytal artery, þou willn’t bleed out. þou ought to þinkest þyself lucky to receive þe mercy you grant not to oþers.”

Sure enough, there in her hand was a small knife, dripping with blood. I had no idea how long she had been awake, but clearly it was long enough to grasp the situation and act, even when I couldn’t.

“Alice…”

“þou... þou faced down þine own deaþ in defence of me. Why? þou benefit naught from putting þy lyfe in peril for mine own,” she asked me, reaching down and taking the dagger away from the man writhing in pain.

“Why? I mean… you’ve already extended every kindness under the sun to me, ain't ya? What sort of cowardly bastard would just sell ya's out after all of that?”

“I… see. I… þank þee for þy bravery.”

She turned away from me, and though it was difficult to tell under firelight, for a moment I thought I saw her turn a little red. It would have been very cute if she wasn't currently holding two knives.

“So… what are we doing about 'im? I’m guessin’ we ain’t killin’ the rat, but we can’t so bloody well leave ‘im be'ind ‘ere, can we?” I asked, pointing at the man named UIric, still clenching his bleeding leg.

"We cannot... what, pardon? Please, repeat þyself."

"We can't leave him here," I said, enunciating every syllable.

“Ah-! Aye, I suppose we cannot. He must seekeþ medical attention kwikly if he is to avoid infection. þough, it taketh but one horse to carry a man…”

She turned her head back to me, a devilish smile upon her face. This time, somehow, the bloody knife made her look more cute.

***

“I’ve a message for þee to deliverest to my faþer,” Alice said to Ulric, who’s wound we had wrapped with his cloak. We had set him upon his horse, with the warning that we’d cut him down on sight if we saw him turn from his path to the Edelweiss home.

“Yes, yes, speak youre damned message and send me on my way already,” the man snapped. For someone who served directly under a lord, he had the manners of a five year old.

“Speak to him þus: ‘I, Alice Elizabeþ Edelweiss, hereby retract my renunciation of þe Edelweiss name, and instead claim þe house as myne own. Be it in a week or a decade, I will return to my home and remove him from his seat as head of my house. As þe only daughter and one true heir to þe Edelweiss name, I will not allow him to pervert it any furþer.’”

“A declaration of war? Art ye a fool, girl? Ye stand not a chance in heaven nor hell against your faþer. Ye’ve no allies nor any strengþ of youre own. Everyþing ye have, and everyþing ye be, ys borrowed from him.”

“It ys myne by ryte, and by myne own power and þe grace of God, I will see it in my hands before I die.”

“A stupid declaration from a stupid girl. But fyne, I’ll deliver your blasted message. If þere be'þ naught else, send me off already.”

“If we meet again, I shall extend no furþer mercy. May we henceforþ never cross paþs, for thyne own good.”

With that, Alice gave the all clear for Ulric to take off, and away he went on his still-exhausted horse. I felt bad for the poor thing. Not just because it had so little rest, but because it was owned by such a pathetic man.

“So… you’ve changed your mind? You’re gonna take back your ‘ouse?” I asked, as we returned to the campfire.

“I… still hesitate to call it þe ryte decision. However, if my faþer haþ ordered me killed, I have little choice. Myself and þose around me shalt be in danger, not just of capture, but of deaþ, at any waking moment. Such a lyfe cannot continue indefinitely. þus, it seemeþ þat to fyte be'þ myne only option.”

“Do you think you can win?”

“...I know not. Ulric’s words beareþ truþ, I have little to my name þat comeþ not from my faþer. I may have allys in my faþer’s camp, but his house be’þ loyal to him. þey will come not to myne aid. þe paþ to claiming þe headship of þe Edelweiss house ys… set to be a þorny one, to sayeth þe least.”

That was an understatement. I didn’t know much about this world’s politics, but even I knew we were facing down impossible odds. Still, I had sworn to myself I would help Alice even if it killed me. I’d be there with her all the way, even if the world itself became her enemy.

For now, though, there was nothing I could do but sleep on it.