Learn and Improve - 2

2

???: I have to say, the time you are putting in is paying off, and I would like you to keep it up, because your own efforts are leading you to develop as athletes, and also as individuals. As your coach, I am really happy for you… And with that said, I hope to see you full of excitement in our next training session!

We all responded in unison as was usual when saying goodbye. Then we went to grab our things, which were in one of the corners of the gym, piled up on a wooden bench.

We were a group of people of different ages, but communication between us was actually quite good. Although, naturally, closer relationships were formed between some.

In my case, I became friends with a twenty-one-year-old guy. We were both exhausted that day, and he could not help but complain while we were talking.

Isak:

When training, he would put his long hair up in a bun. It’s almost blond color was very similar to his eyes, which he said were “honey-colored.” He was a bit taller than me, thinner, and certainly more of a sports fan than I was. He also tended to be a bit clumsy or pessimistic, but most of the time he was quite funny and very honest.

Isak: Bro, I still can feel the punch you gave me in the eye…

Twen: I'm sorry... But the coach asked us to be more serious. I don't know what came over him, but this training was too demanding...

Isak: I know… But we did it, didn’t we? Plus, it didn’t seem like you were having much trouble during training. I mean, you did everything right and you were even smiling the whole time.

Twen: Really? I didn't notice… But I've been feeling pretty good lately, like my mind is working at its best all the time.

Isak: I'm happy for you, but I can't take it anymore...

As we talked, I grabbed something I had left on my bag during training. The familiar black and white mask I wore (almost) all the time.

Placing it in front of my face made me feel relieved, as if something had been missing until I put it back in its place.

Twen: I'm done for today too. After so long without my mask, I’m starting to feel dizzy…

Isak: I forgot that happens… Wait, but you still train without it? And at that level? That's sick! I wonder how much you could do if you ever left it on to train.

Twen: I'd like to know too, but it's not something I can do with other people around. It's too dangerous, I'm sorry.

We both felt disappointed at the thought, because we knew it was true. With the endless amount of things that could happen, it would be too risky to use my powers outside of a completely controlled and safe environment.

I removed the bandages covering my hands, exposing my fingers, my wrists, and the foul smell of trapped sweat.

I then covered my torso and legs with more sportswear, all absolutely black to fit my simple color palette. Everything else went into my bag, and with that I was ready to go.

Isak and I grabbed our things and headed for the gym exit. But halfway there, he stopped and turned to me.

Isak: Bro, I almost forgot. Exam period is approaching.

Twen: That's true... I'm impressed by how quickly time has passed.

Isak: The thing is, I was thinking about going out with some friends for drinks when we're done with all that. You probably know Many. He's going to be there.

Twen: Yes, I know him... And I'm starting to think that there is no one in Novadía who doesn't know him.

Isak: You're right! That's awesome... But anyway, the thing is that I would love for you to come with us. If don’t drink alcohol then we can do something different, but the thing is that you're invited.

Twen: If you put it that way, then I don't see why not.

Isak: Nice! So now we just have to wait until we finish the exams… And pray to pass.

Twen: Rather than begging, we should study… But I get the idea.

???: Sure thing, kid! You have to work hard to get what you want.

Both Isak and I received a tap on the shoulder from our coach, who caught us by surprise. He had a big smile on his face.

Twen: What's up, Coach? You look excited.

???: Because I am! I wanted to talk to you about something, kid. You have a moment?

Twen: Sure, no problem.

Isak: Ok, then I'm off. See ya!

After giving me a high five and shaking the coach's hand, Isak left the gym. I wanted to do the same, but I just could not do it yet.

???: Well, I'll ask what I came to ask. Kid, on your first day here you said that you already had some experience with martial arts. But… How much?

Twen: Before coming to Novadía I trained in quite a few places and always different things. I started with something that focused more on grips and locks , but slowly I got into other more aggressive arts .

???: I see… So that’s where your way of moving and your postures come from. And why did you try so many things and not stick to one?

Twen: It was mostly because of my friends. I started training with them, then I decided to try something different, and then I lost a bet… But I really enjoyed it.

???: That's what I wanted to hear! There's no point in doing this if you don't like it, right?

The coach tapped me on the shoulder again, this time with a force he did not quite measure. He was cheerful as always, but that was not all. It was clear that he still had something important to say.

???: You know, kid, here at the “Golden Heart” we are glad to have an OV carrier among us, although it seems strange to us that you have chosen a place like this, which since its beginnings has not been able to stand out among the other gyms in the city…

Twen: Coach… Is this a sudden emotional talk?

???: Not at all! Who do you take me for? What I came to do is deliver a proposal to you.

Twen: Well, let me hear it.

???: You see, some of the people you have been training with have experience competing in regional tournaments, and some have even competed nationally and abroad. As a coach, I love seeing these athletes representing the Golden Heart and putting the results of their own efforts to the test.

He said this while pointing to the photos hanging on the walls. In them, I could see people with medals and trophies, and there was even one of someone in the middle of a fight.

The coach smiled at them, but there was a hint of nostalgia in that expression, which made me think that perhaps the best was already in the past.

???: Currently, our best fighters are already close to retirement. And, as a coach, I must and want to care about future generations… That kid, Isak. Hasn't he told you anything about it?

Twen: Not about what I believe you are trying to say…

???: I will start to encourage competitiveness during training… It’s not an obligation, but in a few months there will be a tournament in Novadía in which many rookies will participate, and it’s not a bad opportunity for the newest ones to start getting to know that world.

Tournaments like that were common in Novadía. At least, as common as the thousand other sports that could be found in the city. I had heard about such things from both Isak and Many.

???: Maybe the Golden Heart is not the best gym in town, but we can’t lose motivation. I have already mentioned it to others and there are three people who are willing to enter the tournament.

Twen: Isak one of them?

???: Exactly. In fact, he asked me about the tournament even before I mentioned it to him. He seems to be a real fan… And, on top of that, he asked me if you were planning to participate as well, but I couldn’t tell him for sure because I don’t know your answer yet…

The conversation took exactly the path I was expecting. Although the coach did not say the exact words, his intention was clear in his gaze, which was waiting for my answer.

Participating in a tournament to represent the Golden Heart is something I had been considering for a while. Long enough, at least, to have a previously prepared response to his proposal.

Twen: Coach… I really appreciate your proposal, I think it is a great opportunity for me and for the others, but my most honest answer in this case would be a no .

???: Then… What? Kid, are you serious? With your experience and how happy you look when you train, I thought your answer would definitely be a yes. What a surprise…

Isak had mentioned that too. Did I really smile that much during training?

In any case, my answer really confused the coach, who still did not seem to believe me.

Twen: I really enjoy martial arts, but what you are proposing to me means much more than just facing another athlete in a ring outside the gym.

One of the main reasons I had to decline is that, if I were part of the team, there was no way I would not take it completely seriously.

Twen: Training competitively means seriously dedicating yourself to training, demonstrating discipline, perseverance and fully preparing yourself to meet your goals. And that sounds great, but it also involves certain sacrifices that I have no intention of making…

The coach seemed to understand what I was saying, but he still did not believe it.

Twen: I learned martial arts because I find it fun, there is not much more to it than that, so I would like to keep this as a hobby…

???: I can understand that, but… You and Isak seem to be the ones who are more serious about training, I've seen that. Can you really say that you're just here to have fun?

Twen: Just because I want to have fun doesn't mean I think this is a joke...

???: Is that so? … Well, if you say so, then fine! But I hope I can continue to see that excitement during your next training sessions, okay?

Twen: Of course…

In a quick change of attitude, the coach burst out laughing and slapped me on the shoulder again (it was already a bit painful). After that, he said goodbye to me by shaking my hand.

And so, although I was a little confused, I was finally able to leave the gym and start my way home. The rest of the people who had been training at that time had already left, so both the gym and the streets felt empty.

Once outside I could hear the water flowing, since the Golden Heart was right in front of the Novadía River, on the north side.

Like every Wednesday at 7:00 p.m., Novadía's public transport seemed to be wrapped in a slight chaos, where finding a free seat was nothing more than a dream.

Luckily for me, the nearest station was one where many people usually got off, so my chances increased.

But that does not matter much if my plan was to walk home.

Some say it is a strange habit, but I prefer to walk any journey that I do not consider too long, unless I feel really exhausted.

The colors of the sunset and this constant, monotonous movement of my body create an ideal environment to calm down and reflect. It is at times like these that my thoughts used to expand and reach unpredictable places.

It is the same thing that happened the day I met the Golden Heart. Back then, I was on my way home, appreciating the beauty of Novadía until I got a message from my mother, then one thing led to another and I ended up at the X-Café.

In fact, I found myself climbing the same steep stairs as that day, from which I could see the river and the other side of the city.

After climbing most of the steps I came to a small viewing platform. There were two wooden benches and high railings to prevent falls, but there was not a single person nearby. The only living being there, apart from me, was a white cat.

I stopped for a few seconds to look at the city, which was still beautiful, and then sat down on a bench to rest, thinking about what had just happened at the gym.

As Isak said, I was feeling pretty well during my last training sessions, and my performance was just as good.

On the other hand, I was not so happy about the coach's proposal. Even though I had decided long ago that I would refuse, I still had this feeling that I had done something wrong.

That thought was spinning around in my head, similar to the cat that walked between my legs and then sat down next to me. He was wearing a thin black collar with his name written on it.

Twen: “Elmer”… An interesting name for a pet. I like it.

I do not know why Elmer was there, but I do know that he was very affectionate, and let himself be petted without complaining.

With one hand on his head and my body resting on that bench, I felt as if fatigue was beginning to take its toll on me. I struggled to keep my eyes open, at least until I stopped worrying about it.

…

I was sent back to that dark place, infinitely wide, silent and completely empty except for my own presence.

Twen: Hey … I had already decided a long time ago that this tournament thing isn’t for me, but I still feel like I did something wrong. It’s not that I have any doubts about it… But then, why do I still feel like I did something wrong?

Obviously, it would seem that I was talking to myself, as I usually do, and that I did not expect an answer. But, somehow, a voice reached my ears.

???: Seriously? … You are joking, right? Are you playing dumb?

From somewhere in that dark room, that voice answered me in a sarcastic tone. It was, in fact, my own voice, although it was impossible to explain where it came from or how it could hear and respond to me.

???: You have superpowers, dammit! There's no excuse strong enough to make it impossible for you, right?

Twen: I know, I know… But the fun is doing this without the mask, and you know it.

???: Well, take it off when you go to a tournament, that's obvious... But you can't just ignore your powers. If there's something in your technique that you don't understand how to correct, you can learn it in an instant with your OV. It's that easy!

As I said before, the potential of someone who has a bond with an object is infinite, and it is something I was perfectly aware of.

???: If you have problems with your nutrition, you change some things inside your body… I have no idea how, but you can experiment. That's what you usually do! Are you exhausted? OV! Are you running late for your training? OV! Did you have an accident and lose a leg? OV!

Twen: But don't you see the advantage that would give me over the others? It's too much! The competitiveness of the sport would be meaningless if I used my mask to take shortcuts or do tricks.

In competitions, it is entirely permissible for someone vinculated to an OV to compete against someone who has not done so. However, by regulation, any use or influence of the OV is prohibited.

My problem was not with the rules, but with what I personally considered correct and fair.

Twen: Fighting doesn't only happen inside the ring. In order to prepare myself physically and mentally, to get to know my opponent and for other things, I could use tricks to arrive at the tournament better prepared than the others... And I think that would be cheating.

???: I know why you say that and I guess you have a point, but… Admit it, you don't even believe it yourself.

Twen: Huh?

???: Everything you say about justice and all that makes sense, of course it does, but you still don't feel satisfied with it and the reason is quite simple. You think you're wasting your abilities, right?

Twen: I…

???: And I say that even if we leave aside your OV. You are capable of doing much more. You and I both know that.

I am sure that from this point on in our conversation, the expression I had beneath my mask changed. The mere thought of me wasting my powers, my own abilities, had always been a bother to me.

Twen: I'll never be able to do everything my mask allows me to do, I'll never be able to bring out my full potential. Never.

???: I know that, and there is no one who can do it… But you will keep trying, right? Because you said it yourself: Anyone who does it is worthy of respect, it’s something admirable. Or are you lying to others?

Twen: What are you saying? That's why I'm in Novadía!

???: Yes, I remember.

Twen: I came here because the JJRU is my best option to learn about object vinculation, and I'm doing what I can to learn what no one else knows yet.

???: And there you go again, talking about what you can do…

Twen: It's not just about the theory. I experiment daily, looking for new possibilities, uses for my powers that I haven't considered yet… I want to look beyond the obvious, to understand how the powers warp the universe, the scientific argument under which they work to take them to the next level…

???: Listen, I don't want to deny your efforts to achieve that goal. I mean, a lot of people seem to have faith that you will make it… But I still believe there are things that you are not doing.

Twen: But… So I'm not doing enough?

I was really getting irritated listening to that voice, my own voice, because it knew exactly what was wrong with me, and it was making me feel humiliated by my own words.

???: This isn't about doing enough or not doing enough. And, in fact, it's not specifically about the tournament either… I want you to meet new emotions, people, experiences, and to challenge yourself. That is making the most of your potential. Doesn't that sound good?

Twen: If it sounds good…? Of course it does! I also want to make the most of my own potential, and I’m looking for a way to achieve that… But this is not the way.

???: And what is it, then?

Twen: I don’t know…

We started that conversation because I was looking for an outcome that I would be happy with. It is not that this voice in my head really knew what the best option was, but it might lead me to consider a new point of view.

Twen: I don't really know, but this won't get me to what we're looking for.

???: And what are you going to do about it?

Twen: I… I’ll keep searching. I won’t enter the tournament, but I’ll help Isak with his training. And I’ll also help Lani overcome her problems with the OV…

???: Will that be your way of making the most of your potential?

Twen: More or less… It might be for now.

???: Well, you don't sound very convinced... It seems to me that you'll have to keep looking.

Saying that, the voice really seemed to lose interest in me. Maybe because, in a way, I was losing the desire to listen too.

???: Anyway, I think you should think about going home now. You've been sitting on a bench outside for a while now, it's getting dark and your body is all sweaty. It wouldn't be good if you ended up catching a cold.

Twen: Yes, you are right…

???: You know… Sooner or later we’ll have this conversation again. I hope you’ll have a better answer by then.

There was still a bittersweet feeling inside me, but I did not think there was a way to get rid of it yet. It was not the first time I had felt it, nor the first time I had tried to get rid of it.

I looked up and raised one of my hands. And, even though I could not see who had been talking to me, I said goodbye to him.

…

I came back to reality. When I opened my eyes I could see that the sunset was almost gone, and I could also see Elmer. He was still in the same position as before, calm and silent.

However, I soon noticed that the two of us were no longer the only living beings in that place.

There was an extra weight on my body and just by moving my eyes I could understand why: Cats. There were two of them on my lap, another playing with my shoes and another on my shoulder.

They all had different colored fur, different shaped collars, and slightly different weights. But for some reason, they had all come to rest next to me.

As someone who has a link with an OV, I probably would not have had any trouble getting out of there without disturbing the cats. There were a million things I could have done, I know... But I did not.

I just did not want to do it. I just stood there, as still as Elmer, not even knowing if he was awake or asleep.

I could still see a bit of orange in the sky, similar to the lights that lit up the streets of Novadía. I could also see one of the first stars, white like the lights coming out of some windows on the other side of the river.

I remained in that position for a few minutes, moving nothing but my eyelids, not thinking about getting up, with a blank stare.