Chapter 10

Milady

The train sways and rattles through the night, but Milady cannot sleep. She stares out the dark window. How did they end up here? On their way to a mythical, potentially unstable wizard she isn’t even sure exists, to ask for help to undo the worst mess she’s ever got herself into. Together with Lucy, who still doesn’t know why she’s here…

She glances at her. She’s so small, huddled up on her seat, her head resting against the window, snoring softly. Milady turns away. Don’t think about it. It’s for the best, they need her. There is no other way.

The dark landscape whirls past her. It wasn’t as if she thought crossing the worlds would be easy. She always knew it might go wrong, but she always imagined that they would be able to handle it. Between the two of them, she and Gullvi had always found a way. But she’s not sure they will this time.

Once Lucy fell asleep, she went through every single book in her library. But they all told her the same thing. The spells had been cast correctly; the ritual space duly prepared. Had it been the invocation? Calling the powers meant weighing every word and, without using their names because that would mean a death sentence to reveal them to the Guardians, she’d written something that she’d thought was foolproof. But maybe it hadn’t been in the end? At least it wasn’t Lucy that was at fault. The guardians had accepted them but had taken Gullvi instead. Why? And why couldn’t she close the portal?

She shifts, disturbed thoughts creeping up on her. What if they won’t make it? What if they won’t be able to close the portal? The books, unsurprisingly, lack a troubleshooting section, and all she is left with is the hope that they will find a solution before it spirals out of control. Good luck with that.

They only have this alleged legendary magician. The elusive mythical creature that, for all she knows, might just as well be someone who ate too many mushrooms and never came out on the other side. Why isn’t there a manual for this? She sighs and, for the umpteenth time, chucks up her jacket as a pillow and closes her eyes, trying to sleep. But no sleep comes, only images from yesterday.

It hadn’t been difficult to find Lucy; a simple trace spell had led her to her. It had been tricker to convince her to come with her. But they needed her. She’d hoped that if she was honest, Lucy would see that she had nothing to hide, and she would trust her again. She didn’t tell her the real reason she had to come with them, though.

It is true that the shadow beings will come after them, but it is Milady and Gullvi that they will aim for. Lucy will simply be a gateway. Her nightmares showed they were still around, and the veil would be thin until they managed to close the portal. But the shadow beings are not the real issue. Lucy has a part to play in closing the portal, banning the Shadow Man, and finding the answers to what happened. Milady just doesn’t know what part yet.

Lucy’s tear-stained face floats by, and she opens her eyes. No, that’s simply how it is living on the street. She isn’t the first to be tricked as a rookie, nor will she be the last. Milady eventually learned the rules of the street and taught the ones around her not to fuck with her, but not before getting bruised. It would be the same for Lucy. The faster she learnt that the easier her life would be. But the image of Lucy crying on the ground won’t leave her.

She must have dozed off in the end, because she wakes up to the conductor announcing they will arrive at their destination shortly. Lucy is awake; she’s leaning against the window, staring out at the suburbs coming into view. She doesn't look at Milady as she stirs, and when the conductor announces they need to prepare to disembark, she simply waits for Milady to get up and follows her out. They will change trains here, and in a couple of hours, they will be in the Wizard’s town.

She offers Lucy a sandwich while they are waiting, and she takes it without a word. Shortly after, the train arrives, and Milady takes her backpack, and Lucy follows her onboard.

The train rattles out from the station. What if the Wizard won’t be able to help them? Then she’ll have to face the Shadow Man. What then? She’s searched through the books for what he might have meant by “I’m the one running this world”, but of course, they won’t give any answers. And once Gullvi had regained her consciousness, she didn’t remember saying that the worst was yet to come, either. She sighs and leans against the window. If she comes out of this alive, she’ll leave Lucy behind and go back to her old life. Lucy had already seen too much, and the night before leaving, Milady had stepped over the line.

“Can you stay with me?", Lucy had asked as the night was falling.

It was the only time she talked to Milady, when she was afraid and the nightmares were looming over her.

“It’s a long day ahead of us tomorrow; we’ll get up early. Try to get some sleep.”

“Please…”

Milady had watched the door to her room, then sat down by her bedside. She needed Lucy to trust her.

“They can’t hurt you, the dreams.”

Lucy had simply nodded weakly.

“Can’t.. can’t you tell me a story?”

“A story? About what?”

“How did you end up on the street?”

Lucy didn’t know it was a question you didn’t ask. Whatever your life was before coming to the city, it stayed in the past. But it was too late. Milady doesn't know why she shared what she did, and she wishes she could undo every word.

“I came from a shitty home. My father wasn’t… the best, you could say. I ran as soon as I was old enough to stay by myself.”

Lucy had gasped.

“Really?”

“I came here and started to make a living. And with time, I got introduced to magic, and I started to work with that.”

Lucy had said something in reply, but by then, Milady realized she’d said too much, and she’d quickly got up.

“It will be a long day tomorrow; we better sleep.”

She’d left without a word, but the door had already swung open. The person she’d been before she had shed her name and become Milady was creeping out, and she’d spent the rest of the night pushing her back in.

A bell rings, and she realizes they are almost there. It’s a small town, and they pass from the countryside to buildings in a matter of minutes. Soon, the train halts by the station, and Milady picks up her backpack, and they leave the train.

She doesn’t know where the man lives, but rumour has it that he lives on a hill outside of town. It’s her best bet, and she walks over to a guard by the door.

“Excuse me, we're looking for a house on a big hill outside of town. Do you know of any?”

The man points out the door and to the right.

“Just follow this street; it will be on your left as you exit the town. It’s no more than a half-hour walk.”

She thanks him and gestures for Lucy to follow her, and she does so without a word.

It’s not difficult to find it, and as they stand at the bottom of the hill, Milady takes a deep breath. This is it. She can’t turn back now. Do or die. She hears Lucy follow her as she starts to climb.

She’s all sweaty as she steps up on the porch. It’s a rundown house with more rooms than she cares to count. The windows are dark, and the porch is neglected, with broken planks spread over it. She hesitantly knocks on the door. For a long while, the house is quiet, and when she’s almost concluded that maybe he wasn’t real in the end, the handle turns, and the door swings open.

Lucy steps behind her. The man that opens is nothing as she would have expected. The legend, the mythical wizard, is old, but surely not 300 years and shorter than her. White hair, an ordinary jumper and shoes that must be older than her; he looks up at them with something Milady can’t decide if it’s curiosity or indifference.

“Yes, how may I help you?”

She didn’t prepare anything to say.

“Are you the legendary magician?", she blurts out without thinking.

Shit, what kind of opening is that. She doesn’t even know if he’s real.

“I could be. Sometimes I am. Who's asking?”

“My name is Milady", she says, and then stops.

She can’t use her taken name with him; that would be bad if he’s the real deal. She takes a deep breath.

“Jenna, my name is Jenna. I'm looking for advice.”

The man watches her.

“What kind of advice would that be?”

Milady looks around, not sure how much she should reveal here on the doorstep, but he doesn’t invite them in.

“It’s about crossing the worlds and closing the portal. We fucked it up.”

The man looks at them for a moment and then says,

"Come inside.”

He leads them into a dark hallway, and the dampness becomes a wall as the door closes behind them. They come to a living room where a fire is burning, and he gestures for them to sit.

“So tell me what you've done, he says as he takes his place on the opposite sofa. “

It’s the only invite she needs. She tells him how she saw the Shadow Man and realized something was stirring. How she went to Gullvi, and they decided they needed to cross the worlds. She tells him the story of how she found the price and that it was Lucy. How they prepared everything according to the books but right before the ritual, Lucy also saw the Shadow Man, and they didn't know what to do about it but decided to go with it despite it all. That they managed to cross the worlds, but it was Gullvi who became the price, while Lucy came with her. And how she’d found the portal, but it wouldn’t close.

The man sits silently until Milady starts to wonder if they’ve actually come to the right place, and then he says,

“There's something you're not telling me.”

She forgot to tell him about the Shadow Man. And so she tells him how he had come to Gullvi, and Milady had met him in the alley, and what he told her. When she’s finished, the room falls silent. At some point, the man gets up, makes them tea and comes back to the table. He still hasn’t said a word.

Milady starts to wonder if he knows what she’s even speaking about. Maybe he simply is a pot-smoking recluse who’s had too many mushrooms in his life to remember what they had come for? But she stays quiet, drinking her tea. After a long while, he clears his throat and says,

“You've got yourself into quite a mess, I must say.”

Milady sighs in relief. He knows what she’s talking about. He’s the real deal.

“But I don't know what went wrong.”, she says.

“Please help us", Lucy suddenly chirps.

Milady stares at her. She didn’t give her the instructions to be quiet, but she thought that was obvious. Since when did she become a magic expert?

“Silent", she whispers.

The man turns to Lucy,

“What is your name?”

“Lucy”

“And they used you in the ritual?”

Lucy nods and starts to cry. The magician murmurs to himself,

“That explains something, at least.”

“What does it explain?", Milady asks, ignoring Lucy.

This is too important to waste on crying. He doesn’t answer her question but instead says, without any hint of arrogance,

“You were afraid of the Guardians, weren’t you?”

“Of course, you need to be cautious with them.”

“No, you were afraid of them; you tried to bribe them.”

Milady frowns. Bribe them? No, they paid for their crossing. Just like the books said. Maybe he doesn’t know what he’s on about in the end. He continues,

“Do you understand who they are?”

“They are the guardians of the world.”

He doesn’t comment but says,

“You never thought about fighting your way through?”

That’s it. They’ve wasted their time. Fight your way through the Guardians? You might as well kill yourself on the spot. Who the fuck would come up with that idea? He obviously has no clue about magic.

The old man doesn’t seem to notice her reaction because he continues,

“You tried to bribe them, and they took the weakest of you.”

The weakest? What does that mean?

“And you didn't have harmony in the circle. That also explains some of the things.”

Is he making this up on the spot? There is no such thing as “harmony” in magic. You need the right set-up, the right deal and the right payments. Maybe he sees her face because he says,

“There are a lot of things that you don't know. “

Lucy peeps, “But can't you tell us? Can't you tell us what you…”

“Shut up!", Milady whispers.

“This is what I mean", the man says. "You don’t have harmony between you. How do you expect your spells to work as you want if your intentions are not clear?”

What the hell is he talking about? She’s not an amateur, she understands how magic works, better than most people.

“You don't know what you don't know. And because of this, things got out of hand when you crossed the worlds. You got tricked. You became the victim of the Shadow Man. He tricked you into it.”

She takes a deep breath and reminds herself that it’s considered rude to shout at people in their own homes. She’s just about to reply when Lucy chirps, “Please teach us, tell us what to do.”

“Can you just be fucking quiet?", Milady mouths at her.

His face softens as he looks at Lucy,

“I could teach you. I could tell you what to do, but you will not understand it.”

Of course she won’t fucking understand it. At least he sees that much.

“But you can tell me", Milady says.

“I spoke to both of you", he says, turning to her.

“But what shall we do?", Lucy asks.

“You need to find harmony between you before you will know what to do.”

He stands up.

“Come back when you’ve found it, and I can help you.”

He leads them out, and Milady waits until he’s closed the door before murmuring, “What a fucking waste of time. And why couldn’t you keep your mouth shut?", she adds to Lucy. "You are not here to think or speak. What do you know about magic?”

She kicks a stone as they walk down the hill. So now it’s just to tell Gullvi they are screwed.