Wounds

The rain let up and the dark cloud passed over leaving dour grey skies in it’s wake. I laid up against a tree clutching my side. Right before I hit the ground, I morphed into my cowgirl form and she took most of the impact from the fall.

I clutched my side, the cut was gone and the pain had dulled but it still stung and continued stinging. My legs felt like they may have been sprained as well. I fell from a great height, it would be unreasonable to expect my endurance to hold out against such a landing.

After a few minutes of sitting around I raised myself to my feet. My legs continued to ache. I limped forward. It was probably best that I return to the crater since I knew it was safe there and so that was what I decided to do.

I morphed into the Buckomondor and galloped. I’d flown about 3/4ths of the way to the charcoal forest so by my estimation based on my average galloping speed, I’d be back home in about 2 hours.

Or so I would have liked to say. Despite not having any visible wounds, I still felt their presence and it was slowing me down. It didn’t seem like they were getting worse but they also weren’t getting much better. On one hand this was good to know. Changing forms essentially halted the damage to that form, but it didn’t do much for the pain. I wondered if this would be a good stopgap measure in case of a just-short-of fatal injury. I also imagined it wouldn’t save me from an actually life ending blow. It would be nice if I just lost the ability to change into that one form but judging from the results of this battle, I was 99% dying in any form would be permanent.

This also meant that until I found some kind of medical treatment, I should avoid morphing into the eel; I would probably bleed out if changed back. It was also too soon to go a second round with the cloud monster just yet. It’s better to stay on the ground for now.

I came to a stop. Maybe, this was a sign. The crater was safe but there was also nothing that would be of use in that area. I needed healing or medical treatment. It might be a better move to seek out a new area and cross the canyon. I’d need to go the long way around but as long as my wounds weren’t worsening then it wouldn’t be a problem.

There was still the possibility of a time limit or that some kind of energy maintained my different forms and that I might revert back to cowgirl eventually.

In that case I would need to stop, set up camp, and wait for the cool down period to end. It would make me vulnerable to attack. I already felt bad about making her take the brunt of the fall damage, I couldn’t have her getting any more injured.

Do I go back to safety and hope that a solution just happens upon me or do I go actively searching into the great unknown for it?

My curiosity had nearly gotten me killed not long ago, and as Jiro I was never a risk taker to begin with. I guess all the new abilities got to my head. The “wait and see” approach was probably the better option yet I couldn’t make myself move. My hooves were firmly dug into the dirt.

It was safer but what had that ever gotten me. Late lonely nights with my hand. A big empty hospital room. My brother and his family becoming so distant. My best friend leaving me! Memories welled up with an intensity I hadn’t expected. I hadn’t lived a bad life, but the regret and guilt piled up. Safety should be cherished yet it also left me isolated in a way I didn’t fully understand until much later.

I couldn’t lead the same life I led before even if it would be so easy to do so.

The choice now was as clear as day. I wasn’t going to sit and wait for death to come for me this time. I had a bet to win. I would survive from now on, any way I could.