Volume 1 – Chapter 3: Fractured Normalcy

"I would fall in love with a woman, not a man, if I am to live a life with one year to live."

For a second, my brain refused to process it. Maybe I was dreaming. Maybe it was just Aiko dropping something.

Then I heard Mom’s voice. Sharp. Unsteady.

I sat up, heart pounding.

"...How much longer do you think we have before everything falls apart!?"

Dad's reply was quieter, but just as tense. "Lower your voice."

I'd toiled upstairs and was now leaning on the railing I stood by the wall.

Mother was there at the kitchen table. Her hands were on the edge of the table as if she needed this

support. At her feet a broken coffee mug was half-fill with the black liquid that spilled out from around the sides.

Dad stood across from her, arms crossed.

"I saw the news," Mom continued. "The government is still regulating that they have a plan, even though we know for sure that it is absolute nonsense."

"We don’t know anything for sure."

She let out a hollow laugh. "Exactly. That’s the problem. We don’t know. And when we finally do, it’ll be too late to do anything about it."

Dad exhaled slowly, rubbing his temples. "So what do you want to do? Pack up and run? Where? There’s nowhere to go, Hitomi."

Mom’s fingers curled into fists. "I just… I just want us to be safe."

Safe.

That word didn’t mean anything anymore.

I turned away before they could see me.

[April 19 – 9:15 AM]

School was officially

canceled indefinitely, but a few of us still went anyway.

Not to study. Not to attend classes.

Just to see what was left of it.

Some students had already started vandalizing the place. The front gate was covered in graffiti—some of it just random tags, some of it messages:

"LIVE FAST, DIE FREE."

"F* THE SYSTEM."**

"SEE YOU IN HELL."

The glass case that usually held school announcements was shattered. Desks had been dragged into the courtyard, flipped over, and broken apart.It wasn’t just destruction. It was grief.

On top of that, it was obvious

that a bunch of old guys have totally abandoned the idea of sobriety and wisdom, looks like it was so inaudible they couldn't achieve any great result.

Some just wandered the hallways, staring at the empty classrooms like a haunting ghost of their own past.

I rather the stairway sitting by the second floor, my arms

resting on my knees. Footsteps approached.

"You came too, huh?"

I looked up.

Rika.

A lollipop in her mouth, hands in the pockets of her hoodie. She plopped down next to me, stretching her legs. We had both gone silent for a minute. Finally,

she sighed. "It’s weird, isn’t it?" "Yeah." “…Do you think it’s going to get worse?” I didn’t answer right away. We both knew the truth. Of course it would. Rika fell back against the railing, her eyes unfocused. “I always thought we had forever.”

I swallowed. "Yeah. Me too."

Another pause.

Then, she nudged me lightly with her foot. "You ever

think about what you’d do? You know… if none of this was happening?"

I hesitated. "What do you mean?"

"Like… if the world wasn’t ending. What would you be doing a year from now?"

I thought about it.

I thought about finishing school. Going to college.

Maybe moving out, getting my own place. Figuring life out one step at a time.

None of that mattered anymore.

"I don’t know," I admitted. Rika hummed, glancing in my direction. "Liar." I raised an eyebrow. "What?" "You totally had a plan. Perhaps not a perfect one, but something. No one moves through life with no sense,

even vaguely, of their goal.’ I exhaled through my nose. "Okay, what about you, then?" She smirked. "I asked you first." “Yeah, well, I’m asking you now.” She made an appreciative noise, rolling the lollipop in her teeth. “I was going to move to Tokyo.” That surprised me. "Really?" She nodded. “Wanted to go to university there. Maybe get into journalism. Travel. See

the world." I didn’t know that about her. Then again, there was probably a lot I didn’t know about her. I glanced at her. “Well, guess that’s not going to happen now, huh?” She let out a breathy laugh. "Guess not." Silence stretched between us. But it wasn’t uncomfortable. It was the type of silence that occurred when two people were not required to pad the

spaces with meaningless words. At last Rika got up, brushing down her jeans. "Come on." I blinked. "What?" “We could sit here wallowing in self-pity, or we could do something.” I frowned. "Like what?"

She grinned. And for the first time in days, it wasn’t forced.

"Like making this year count."

---

[April 19 – 3:40 PM]

The first riot happened downtown.

A supermarket ran out of supplies. People got desperate.

Fights broke out. A window shattered. Someone fired a gun.

The police attempted to

manage the crowd but nobody was scared anymore. There was nothing to lose anymore. When things settled, three were dead, a dozen injured. Mom and Dad stared blankly at the news. Aiko held onto me, her small fingers so tightly clutching my sleeve that it pained me. I didn’t have the heart to tell her to move on. [April 19 – 10:20 PM] I couldn’t sleep that night. I

stayed in bed, looking at the ceiling. Rika’s words reverberated through my mind. “Like, making this year count.” What did that even mean? What could we do? Was there even a point? I turned over and let out a sharp exhalation. I didn’t have the answers. But maybe it didn’t matter. 

Perhaps the realization focused on the effort. And maybe, just maybe, I didn't want to be the only one facing that. I snatched my phone, pausing only a moment before typing a message. [Me: Hey. You up? A few minutes passed. Then— [Rika: Yeah.] I stared at the screen. Then, before I could overthink it — [Me: Let’s meet tomorrow.] This time, she responded shortly thereafter. [Rika: Finally, someone asks.]