Return

Queen Bria had gone off on another of her frequent trips through Rayston and was nowhere to be seen when I got back to Castle Rivenmoor. I felt a rush of exhilaration that pushed me up the little staircase that led to Prince Jase's room. I caught a glimpse of him through the slightly open door of the old wooden structure, slumped over a jumbled mess of books, notes, and papers, his forehead wrinkled in concentration. After a moment of hesitation, I made a quiet but purposeful sound as I tapped my knuckles against the frame. He raised his eyes, and a glimmer of recognition lit up his face as he stood up.

"Hi!" Jase exclaimed. There was a warmth in his words that tightened my chest. "I had no idea when you would return," he added.

With a tiny smile tugging at my lips, I answered, "Neither did I, sir." My boots creaked on the shiny floor as I hesitantly stepped forward. Something had changed between us three nights ago, or had it? The recollection held on to me like a dream so intense that it was difficult to distinguish between fact and fiction. Had my restless mind imagined it during the calm hours, or had it actually happened? My pulse accelerated as I looked for answers in his expression.

Then I stumbled. Prince Jase—Jase—had not made any effort to get closer to us. I took a step back, clinging to the ragged edges of my poise as my grin faltered and doubt crept in.

"Camryn?" Jase asked in a soft yet inquisitive tone.

"Yeah, sir?" I replied, my voice no more than a whisper as I stumbled.

"For what reason did I ask that you call me?" Jase questioned. His words ignited a surge of assurance that almost had me run toward him like a spark. It had been real, not a trick of desire, not a dream. Unless, of course, this moment was also a dream. If it was, though, I concluded I didn't mind because it was a nice delusion that I could stay in.

"I apologize, sir. Jase," I said. The name was a strange, awkward form on my tongue. "That sounds really strange."

"I understand," Jase said, laughing softly. "I apologize."

I shook my head and reassured him, "No, I like it." I added, "It's simply that nobody calls you that. Not me in particular."

"I understand," Jase replied. A thick and palpable uneasy quiet descended upon us as his agreement lingered in the air. Uncertain whether to take a step forward or back off completely, I adjusted my weight.

Finally breaking the silence, Jase remarked, "Well, are you going to enter or will you just stand in the doorway all evening?"

"I thought I might fetch a tray of tea," I said, as I steadied myself by grabbing onto something familiar.

"That sounds fine. I'll accompany you," Jase offered. We strolled down the hallway at a leisurely pace, the tension reducing with each step as he settled into step next to me. Without Queen Bria's dominant presence, Castle Rivenmoor seemed more tranquil, with the typical commotion giving way to a calm silence.

"What is the duration of Queen Bria's absence?" I asked, giving him a sidelong glance.

"Almost a whole week," Jase answered. "You know, she gave my books and belongings back."

"I observed," I stated. My smile got bigger. "That's fantastic! You can now resume your studies."

Jase remarked reflectively, "I'm not sure I want to spend all my time on that anymore." The aroma of bread and herbs wafted into the room as we entered the kitchen.

"Why not?" Startled, I asked. "You adore it!" I walked over to the counter and carefully gathered cups, a teapot, and a tray. I enjoyed the peace today since I wasn't in a rush or had any pressing obligations.

"Because I've found that I also love other things," Jase explained. A smile grew across my face as I couldn't help but imitate his gentle, open smile. We carried the tray to The Moonlit Gardens when the tea was ready, and even though it was freezing outside and bit my fingertips, we sat on a stone seat.

"You know," Jase continued in a low, sincere voice, "I really missed you."

"I also missed you," I replied. After a moment of hesitation, I asked, "Did you, uh, tell your mother… about, well…?"

Jase raised an eyebrow and finished for me, "Everything?"

"Yes," I confirmed, chuckling nervously.

"No, I kept it from her," Jase admitted. "It's unlikely that she would have comprehended. I mean, how could she? I don't even understand."

"You don't get it?" I questioned. Jase cocked his head, sipping his tea slowly as steam rose in delicate tendrils.

I looked into my own cup and said, "I don't think so."

Jase's eyes remained steady as he put down his tea. "You claim to love me just as much as I love you," he stated. "Is there anything else to comprehend?"

With a hint of sarcasm in my voice, I said, "Well, I don't know." I continued, "Perhaps because you're a prince and I'm a maid? Or that your mom would kill you for sure? Or the innumerable other complications? Believe me, a lot of things don't make sense."

Once more, silence descended with greater weight. We ultimately withdrew inside, the warmth of Castle Rivenmoor providing a much-needed respite as the cold became stronger all around us and began to soak through my flimsy cloak. I walked with him back to his room and took a seat across from him at the messy table. His face was serious as he leaned forward a little.

Jase declared, "You would be queen."

"What?" I asked, taken aback and blinking.

"You would be queen if we got married," Jase repeated. He flashed a smile, but I couldn't tell if it was tight or hopeful.

"I'm not fit to be a queen!" I exclaimed. Before I could stop them, the words exploded from me.

Jase's grin turned into a worried grimace. "Why not?" he asked.

"Jase, because I work as a maid!" I cried, making a helpless gesture toward myself. "I don't speak well, I don't wear elegant clothes, and I wouldn't even know how to be a queen." I felt unable to do it.

"But if you want to marry me, you'd have to," Jase insisted.

"Jase, I'm seventeen—I don't need to make a decision right now!" I exclaimed. I lowered my voice as he gave me a slow nod. "Plus, I might not," I added softly.

"Maybe not what?" Jase's tone became piercing. "Maybe you won't marry me?" he pressed.

"Yes," I muttered.

Jase's expression was one of shock mixed with a hint of rage. "However, you claimed to adore me!" he exclaimed.

I reached for his hand but stopped short, saying, "Jase, I do." I continued, "But, see, before we discuss marriage, we both need some time. Believe me, even if Queen Bria agrees, I won't marry you this month because I'm simply not ready. That doesn't imply that I don't cherish you. It simply indicates that I need time."

Jase's shoulders relaxed as he let out a breath. "I get it," he said. "I also require time. It's a lot to take in."

With a wave of relief, I grinned. "I'm grateful, Jase," I said. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay? I have to unpack in my room."

"All right," Jase agreed. His arms were solid and warm as he stood up and drew me into an embrace. His hand moved slowly upward, its fingers caressing my cheek with such affection that I gasped. "I cherish you," he muttered.

"I also love you," I whispered back. He smiled, let go of me, and moved away. With a knotted knot of confusion and hope in my heart, I turned and snuck out of the room. This Prince and I, what were we to do?