A Delightful Morning

Nitsuki's eyes slowly opened, and she found herself staring up at the ceiling. The first thing she noticed was the warmth of her blankets wrapped around her, the second was the sound of the rain pouring down outside, and the third was the dull ache that had settled deep within her body.

She winced as the pain flared up; her head pounded as she rolled onto her side. It was probably a mix of hunger, dehydration, and exhaustion.

She stumbled through her morning routine, brushing her teeth, washing her face, taking her meds, then shuffling over toward the kitchen to make herself something to eat—

"…" Nitsuki stared at the vacant, unpowered, and defrosted refrigerator. "Right."

Her cupboards were just as barren. She had disposed of all of her food prior to her… attempt. Even the rice and spices were gone.

"Crap. Why did I have to be so considerate? Now I'm going to starve," she muttered to herself, leaning against the counter. Her stomach growled loudly, demanding sustenance. She hadn't eaten since two days ago.

The konbini was a thirty-minute walk, the grocery store was forty, and the bakery was… an hour. That was the extent of her options if she didn't want to go to the cafe or one of the two restaurants that were in town.

"…The konbini, it is," she grumbled.

After getting dressed, she put on her coat and shoes and then stepped out into the rain. Immediately, she was hit by the cold wind and wet drops, and she shivered, pulling her hood up. It was miserable out, but at least it was peaceful. The town was nearly deserted this early in the morning—save for the occasional passing car—and the only other sounds were those of nature: the rustling of trees, the distant rumble of thunder, and the steady patter of rain against the pavement.

She wished she hadn't donated her umbrella. Her coat wasn't holding up as well as she was expecting it to.

Nitsuki continued walking along the side of the street, keeping her head down and her hands stuffed deep into her pockets.

She would've had a scooter to drive had she not gotten rid of that too. She had given it away to one of the few high schoolers that lived in the town. She was a polite, timid kid, and Nitsuki knew she needed it to make her commute around town easier. Even so, it was now another inconvenience to pile onto her growing list of regrets.

Eh, well she couldn't regret that one too much. The kid's smile had been worth it.

She continued to walk, her breath coming out in white puffs as she made her way down the road and eventually toward the konbini.

***

When Nitsuki finally arrived, she was soaked from head to toe. The automatic doors slid open, and she stepped inside, greeted by the familiar sound of the jingle and the smell of pre-packaged food wafting through the air.

"Welcome!" the clerk said cheerily, but his smile quickly faded when he saw her. "Miss? Are you alright?"

Nitsuki glanced down at herself. She was drenched, her clothes were sticking to her skin, and her hair was plastered to her forehead.

"Ah, don't mind me," she said, giving him a small wave as she headed towards the back of the store to grab some stuff.

She didn't recognize the guy at the register. He was probably new in town.

He gave her a skeptical look, but she ignored him and quickly went to work, grabbing some snacks and some bento meals. She could also probably get some spare ingredients to cook with and some drinks to keep her hydrated and tied over.

As she roamed the store, her eyes eventually landed on the magazines and newspapers. One in particular stood out to her, and she stopped to look at it. There was some sort of renowned actress and model on the cover, posing in a cute lolita dress. Nitsuki's hand reached out to touch the picture, and her fingers traced over the glossy paper.

She was beautiful.

Sure, Nitsuki knew that the picture had probably been photoshopped, and she didn't doubt that the girl had a team of people making her look that good. But even so, she felt a little jealous.

She would never be able to look like that, no matter what she did. No amount of makeup, or clothing, or surgery, or anything else would ever make her look that feminine.

Nitsuki bit her lip and turned away and… right into the clerk, who had apparently come to check on her with a wary expression.

"E-excuse me, miss? Are you sure you're okay?"

Nitsuki stared at him for a moment, and then she took a deep breath and forced a smile. "Yeah, sorry. I… lost my umbrella, and I ran out of food," she said in as soft a voice as she could manage, gesturing to the stuff in her arms. "I just… needed a bit of a pick me up."

He nodded slowly. "Oh… okay. Um, let me know if you need any help finding anything. And uh, the umbrellas are in the front, near the register."

She nodded back. "Thanks."

His eyes lingered on her for a little longer before heading back to his post.

Once he was gone, Nitsuki let out a sigh of relief and placed a hand on her chest, feeling her heart beating rapidly. Her fingers curled into the fabric of her shirt tightly as she tried to calm down.

"Damn it. I'm pathetic," she muttered under her breath.

***

Nitsuki shuffled back home, carrying her bags of groceries awkwardly in one hand while holding a newly purchased umbrella in the other. The wind had picked up even more, so she had to lean into it just to keep herself upright.

Her legs ached, her feet hurt, and her head was throbbing. She was cold and wet and miserable.

"I love being alive," she said sarcastically to no one in particular as she dodged a puddle on the sidewalk.

Nitsuki was tempted to take a break—maybe sit on a bench and rest for a moment—but she knew that if she did that, she'd just get even more soaked. So instead, she kept trudging forward through the deluge.

Her mind began to wander to distract her from the unpleasantness. Specifically, she thought of the clerk from earlier.

Had he noticed anything off about her? He had been pretty suspicious of her, and he had definitely checked her out. Perhaps he had noticed something wrong with her body—like how wide her shoulders were or the way her clothes didn't quite fit right.

Or maybe she was just being paranoid and insecure. It was entirely possible that she had been overreacting.

Her head suddenly shot upward as she had an idea. Hold on, couldn't she try out her gift? Daimon had said that it could be used to view potential futures, so she should in theory be able to use it now.

With that, Nitsuki focused, trying to see a future where she… um, hinted to the clerk about herself. Perhaps it would be something pleasant, like, "Oh! I would've never known, you look so cute though!" and then she'd feel validated.

She closed her eyes and concentrated. It was rather hard to do with the rain pouring down on her, but after a few moments of concentration, it happened. Everything became still, and a vision appeared in front of her, playing like a movie in her mind's eye.

Nitsuki was back at the moment where she had walked in. However, this time when the clerk spotted her and asked her if she was alright, she continued the conversation.

"Ah, don't mind me. Besides, you wouldn't want to waste your breath talking to a 'guy' like me anyway." She gave him a small, self-deprecating chuckle.

He gave her a confused look. "What?"

"…Wait, did you not notice anything weird about me?" She frowned, staring at him in confusion.

He shook his head slowly. "I mean, I noticed that you're soaking wet. But other than that, no. Should I have?"

She blinked, and then laughed awkwardly, her cheeks turning a light shade of pink. "Uh, n-nevermind."

The clerk's face turned red, and he cleared his throat, looking away from her. "Right, um, well, let me know if you need any help finding anything. And uh, the umbrellas are in the front, near the register."

"T-thanks," she muttered, turning away to grab her stuff.

***

Nitsuki blinked and found herself once again standing on the side of the road.

"…Huh." That was surprisingly normal—maybe a bit awkward, but normal. In fact, it had ended up being a fairly mundane, somewhat pleasant exchange.

The clerk really hadn't noticed anything strange about her. Although… maybe if she had shown a bit more of herself, his reaction might've been more negative.

She immediately began imaging what would've happened in that hypothetical, but she quickly shook the idea away.

Ah. So this was what Daimon had warned her about: using her ability to second guess her every action. She was beginning to see how easy it would be to become obsessed with it—to constantly seek validation through the visions.

She took a deep breath and tried to clear her thoughts from the what ifs and maybes. Instead, she went with the assumption that the clerk hadn't seen anything 'wrong' about her.

"If I can have more encounters like that, then maybe life isn't so bad after all—"

A rogue wind hit her and blew her umbrella right out of her hands, tumbling across the road before getting promptly crushed by a car.

"…Seriously?"

She dejectedly stared at the crumbled heap of relatively expensive metal that had once been her umbrella as the car skidded to a stop.

The driver—a lightly freckled man with short, dark brown hair—quickly stepped out of his vehicle, holding an umbrella as he approached. "S-sorry! I didn't mean to—eh, Nia?!"

Nitsuki looked up and blinked wordlessly at the familiar face.

"Oh… hey, Tachibana."