443. About power, 7

(Rose)

It’s more than a mere barren landscape that lies ahead.

It’s more impressive than finding the lost Atlantis. It’s a very core of culture and meaning of life. God.

I keep having shivers as I realise what is truly in the distance, ahead of me. What it is I’m truly looking at, behind its appearance.

Many years ago, that thing was so full of energy, it shone like a star in the sky, to some beings-like-her with the proper eyes to that spectrum of radiation.

And then, one day, that star seemed to vanish.

While in truth, it continued to grow bigger.

In an abusive metaphor, it had collapsed from star to black hole. Instead of emitting strong radiations, it begun to absorb them far more. It began absorbing everything remotely alive, over an ever-growing radius.

A being-like-her, reaching a level of power far beyond anything witnessed before, and wilfully invisible from there on.

How many demons with god complex have I met? None of them could spread their power and will much further than a city’s range around their core structure.

The god I’ve never quite met, the Dragod, was the size of a mountain. It was growing buried underground in the middle of England. That god had been discreet in its growth. Blume implied they all are.

She implied, and she acted that way as well, trying not to make waves too visible in the sea as they grow.

Because when they make waves, when they make themselves visible, they attract predators.

They reveal their existence and presence to everything else when they let their power shine.

That one ahead followed that advice as well it seems. It managed to hid itself entirely, by beginning to absorb every radiation falling around it in the spectrum of T.I. It acted as a hole.

That, and also it was obviously hungry for organic materials. Widely.

It must feed. Meaning it’s building a body, or fuelling it.

A body that would require everything that grows in more than a hundred kilometres radius already.

Something immense is growing in the distance, making a desert grow in its shade.

It’s uncompromising, but my morale is still feeling insecure.

It’s the usual dilemma. Who am I to judge something that needs to eat other lifeforms to live?

My righteousness is not that clear and pure.

B - We’ve had these talks a thousand times.

R - And even many more times whilst you were away.

B - You’re thinking too much, and you project your ideals around yourself. The world doesn’t care. Nobody’s left to care nor judge you. Nature doesn’t know what justice and balance are.

R - The only thing left is what I desire.

B - Exactly. You’re too idealistic for your own good.

R - That’s who I am.

B - I know that my sweet Rose. I still love you.

R - I’ll try to sum it up... If that thing is destroying the land in a way that could cause a catastrophe for lives widely, then I want to stop it.

B - There are many flaws in that logic, but I understand you’re trying to be virtuous, for yourself and what you consider to be nature.

R - There’s no such thing as evil in nature, I get that, so it’s hard to judge fairly.

B - That’s one way to get it.

Unless it represents a direct threat to your own survival, it’s really hazy in morality to judge the actions of another lifeform.

B - To reassure you, there are two things I can say that would go in the same direction as your first impression toward this god.

R - Yes?

B - First, it’s also eating all possible invisible creatures, seeds and flowers alike. So it’s eating the old nature, made of matter, as well as the new one made of T.I. Everything goes extinct here.

R - I see.

B - The second one is... That no being-like-me, no matter its structure and size, would actually need to consume either aspects of nature to that level, just in order to live. Using them, consuming other lifeforms of an aspect or the other, it makes life easier obviously, but we’re still essentially autotrophic structures.

R - You just need the invisible water and some sunlight to live.

B - Exactly, and we can all grow into beautiful flowers like me.

R - Hm... So it doesn’t make sense to you for a being-like-you to lay waste to a large area like this?

B - It does make sense, but not just to feed from start. To protect yourself from dangerous animals like humans, first of all.

R - I remember a bad flower or two doing that on occasions. And second?

B - Simply... The wish to see all life go extinct. A desire to destroy it. That could also explain why this dead zone is so absolute and so wide. There’s possibly a will behind.

R - If it is that...

B - Let’s hope it is. Because that would be easier for you morally to justify killing it. You’re too kind Rose. You’re the only one left pondering about the morality of your desires. Come on, be wild.

R - Are you trying to tempt me, demon?

B - Ah ah ah. Of course I am! Be free...

I want you...

To be free...

Her words echoed heavily in my head. Bleue...

R - I keep thinking back about Licht and Ogre. I keep them in my mind as the voices of my wildest impulses and most noble ideal. They speak to me as my good and evil sides.

B - Okay. And which is which?

R - Bitch!

I’m offended, but I still laugh. That was a good one. A painfully good tease.

B - It puzzles me. I thought your mother and father were your noble ideals. The way they acted, the Lichts were more on the side of daiûas than you usually are.

R - What?

B - The lichts had strong will to act, and that’s what you admire when you doubt yourself. But the will of the Licht was really only to fight and destroy gods. They’re not fundamentally as moral as you are in my opinion.

I’m a little struck.

B - Their reasons were right to you, so you see them as heroes, but to my eyes, the Lichts were closer to obtuse beings-like-me, like Ogre, than you are, or would ever be.

I’m agape.

B - It’s kind of because you don’t fully accept your desires and instincts that you’re fun to be with. Your nature is always slowly sliding toward that side of impulses and wills without a doubt. But you keep pulling yourself back with doubts, questions and uncertainty. You keep trying to pull yourself toward your flowery ideal. That makes you more virtuous than the others in my mind.

R - Then why do you all keep tempting me!

B - Well, Ogre because she wanted to destroy you. Bleu because hm... because she loved you I think. Me, a little of this, a little of that. Mostly because it’s really funny to tease you.

R - You’re a real bitch today!

B - I’ve had time to grow my persona, and it turns out I quite enjoy the first meaning you gave me of what daiûas are. Mischievous, playful demons.

R - Oh lucky me...

~

R - Jokes aside... It sounded like you know me better than I know myself for a moment. And you raised some good points.

B - You can decide whatever you want to do Rose. I know it will be an honest thought and decision made with altruistic care in mind. Because you will keep asking yourself what would be the right thing to do? With you ideal light to guide you. Maybe I will tell you that your choice is insane when it is, but I will likely follow you either way Rose. You can enjoy being both a monster and a flower as you rightfully already are.

R - That was somewhat nicer put like that.

B - I’m probably just feeling hungry right now.

~