Yearning

I stand upon the shore, looking out over the rolling waves as they wash onto the sand, and eventually into obscurity. Twilight twinkles and dances over the ever-shifting surface, almost mimicking the night sky that soon will be cast upon it.

It's absolutely breathtaking. Every single time I visit, I can't help but take it all in. There's scarcely any sight in this world that could match it now. And while at one point, competition would have been much fiercer, the focus of those rival sights is no longer here—you haven't been for quite some time.

"Five years have passed by so quickly, haven't they, Minato?"

A gentle breeze from the ocean flusters my clothes and caresses my cheek, almost like the way you would tickle me. If I close my eyes, perhaps I can pretend that you are.

When you last sailed across that horizon, it had been just another morning. The sun's rays had barely begun to reach over the horizon, and the glow of my phone's screen had been enough to outshine it. I'd hardly been awake then, but just as always, I was there by the docks, waiting for you to finish loading your ship. Your arms were full of supplies, and I could only imagine how difficult it would be to give you a tight hug.

"Minato," I said to you. "I need a kiss." And you quipped back at me with that smile of yours.

Of course, you still gave it.

I knew what I was getting into when I married a fisherman. You would be out on the open waves for weeks or months at a time. And unlike your coastal brethren, the horizon was the destination, not the boundary. Still, the pay was good, you were happy, and the long, uninterrupted breaks between your jobs were always a delight. It was a small price for such happiness.

And it was. Truly, it was.

We had our whole life laid out before us. We'd talked about it the night before you left, almost as though we were still in high school. Your company searched for tuna the world over, and at the rate things were going, you just needed a few more good seasons. After, the money you'd earned would see us to retirement, and we'd spend every day together again.

We wouldn't need to experience the high life of the city, nor the luxury of a grand mansion or a villa on the coast. We would be happy in a small house out in the country, with a little garden in the back, and a kitchen barely large enough for us to cook in together.

In that moment, I could picture our future. I could see us in our little paradise, with the smell of a fresh miso filling the morning air, and the sounds of our laughter ringing out through the home.

A rogue wave suddenly washes further ashore than the others. The salty sea spray mists my face, and I can taste its brine on my lips.

I look back toward the horizon. When you last disappeared over that faraway line, I told myself that I would be strong, and that we would soon meet again. I wasn't naive; I was fully aware that the sea was a dangerous place, and that there was always a chance we would never see one another again. Yet, that danger seemed distant. You were so capable, so strong, so sure of your abilities, and you'd always come home before.

I clutch my hand to my chest, and stretch out my other toward the dying light. My heart aches. If only you were here, right beside me. If only my hand could reach out, and find your warm body to embrace.

But it can't. Instead, I can only grasp at the empty air in your absence.

The breeze picks up once more, and this time it's cold against my cheek.

"Oh Minato, may this lullaby I offer reach to you from the shores, and find you where the sea has carried you. Though the world we dreamed of will never come to pass, know that in my heart, it has not been lost."

I take a calming breath, and let out my voice to the ocean that stole you away.

 "My dearest love amongst the sea,

 May mine music reach your ears.

 Your tardiness makes me a hollow mess.

 Filled only by salty tears.

 My dearest love amongst the sea,

 May mine singing reach your heart.

 Your absence leaves me in an empty stress.

 So long, we have spent apart.

 My dearest love amongst the sea,

 May mine lyrics stir your soul.

 Your abstinence makes me so, so depressed.

 But I will not lose hope.

 My dearest love amongst the sea,

 May we one day be whole."

As the last of my notes fade into the evening breeze, my head bows and my eyes shut, and I feel the tear that I've been holding back finally fall.

If I close my eyes, and listen, perhaps I can hear your voice on the wind. Ah, and there it is, just barely audible—

"Arashi, what the hell was that line about 'abstinence'?!"

I giggle. But as I open my eyes, the sounds of the ocean fill my ears once more.

"Oh, Minato, my love. If only you were here." I sigh, and look back over the horizon. The sun has already set.

The wind kicks up, and I'm filled with an intense shudder. I really should return home. It's not safe to be out here after dark, and I'm already feeling the cold nip at my heels.

As I turn toward the parking lot though, I'm forced to rub my eyes.

It couldn't be.

Standing right there amongst the dying light of the twilight, I can just barely make out the figure of a person.

My mind tells me it's not true, but my heart doesn't care! My legs kick into action, and then I'm running, sprinting, racing across the sand as fast as I can!

"Minato!!"

And then, I crash. Two bodies, locked into an embrace, and rolling around in the sand on the beach.

We simply stare into each other's eyes, until I can't help but laugh at the absurdity.

You sigh. "Don't you think you're a little too old for this sort of thing?"

I smile, and say, "I'm sorry."

"You better be. Seriously, don't you think it's in rather bad taste to joke about something like that?" you ask me with a frown.

I giggle. "I'm sorry! It was just too tempting. You set yourself up perfectly for that one."

You roll your eyes, but I can see the hint of a smirk on your lips. "I was literally a single day late. Also, as touching as your lullaby was, I have to reiterate how disappointed I am in you. 'Abstinence'? Really?"

"I said I'm sorry!" My face puffs up in a pout, but I can't hold it long before a grin replaces it and we start to laugh. I look into your beautiful, deep brown eyes again, and my joy is replaced by longing. I lift myself closer to you, until our lips are mere millimeters apart and your warm breath mingles with mine.

"I love you," I whisper to you.

"Me too, Arashi. Me too. But that still isn't going to change my mind about tonight."

"B-but why?! After my beautiful, heartfelt song, and after all that time at sea, aren't you just a tiny bit in the mood for a little—"

"Not tonight, you dramatic horndog."

"Meanie!"