Emi's Confession/Aeon's Lament

Each unanswered ring sent waves of despair crashing against Hazuki’s barely composed mental state. After what felt like minutes, the line connected.

“Hello?” answered an elderly woman’s voice.

“Emi! It’s Hachiro from the park! How are you?” asked the horticulturist who was named Hachiro.

Hazuki could hear the older woman’s voice from the dial without understanding her. Something in his body felt drawn to her now that he knew she was real and was alive. Slowly, he found himself drifting closer to the phone conversation.

“So yeah you should come by soon! It’s been ages!” said Hachiro.

After a pause, the voice agreed.

“Really?! That’s great! Tomorrow? Wonderful we’ll all be here to see you! Okay, bye!” said Hachiro.

He hung up and returned his phone to his pocket.

“She’s coming?” asked the park director.

Hachiro gave a thumbs up.

“She seemed hesitant at first. She said something odd. Almost seemed like she was talking to herself. She said, ’It’s May, that should be okay.’ What’s the month got to do with it?” asked Hachiro as he grabbed his tools from nearby.

Matsumoto and the park director shrugged. Emi’s acknowledgment of the month felt off to Hazuki. May meant Naoe wasn’t there. Optimism, curiosity, uncertainty, confusion, and numerous other emotions all jostled against one another in Hazuki’s mind as he thought about the opportunity that was arriving tomorrow. Someone else might know about Naoe. They might have answers. Hazuki found himself becoming nervously excited.

Sleep snapped by in a blink that night. Ever since his nightmare about Naoe and the roots, Hazuki had rarely dreamed. It was as though there was a block in his psyche keeping him from sensing or remembering anything from his slumber. What he could not determine was if it was a block due to what he had seen, or if it was from the medication now fully flowing through his body once more. Still, he missed the dreams.

Thoughts of Naoe curled in pain and screaming in terror when she saw him haunted his waking mind as he sat up that morning. To his concern, the memory of that dream was already beginning to fade like a flower that had been left in the sun. With this realization eating at him, Hazuki set his mind to his task at hand. Emi was set to arrive around noon to join them for a team lunch. Hazuki had every intention of meeting her.

Morning crawled by as anticipation heightened Hazuki’s anxiety and impatience. As he walked through the park, he found himself wanting to see Naoe’s tree before meeting Emi, in the hope of putting his mind at ease. To his surprise, when he neared his destination, he saw someone had already beaten him to the tree. Standing at Naoe’s tree with a look of somber, tragic guilt and pensiveness was an elderly woman. Even from afar, Hazuki felt the draw in his chest pulling him to her, and it almost seemed as though she stood out from her surroundings ever so slightly. As though he could see her slightly more clearly than everything else besides Naoe’s tree. She must have been Emi.

Before Hazuki could say anything to her, Emi heard his tapping cane as he walked and turned to see who was approaching. Her response was unsettling. As soon as she saw Hazuki, it was as though she was expecting him. Emi let out a tired whimper and shook her head. It made him pause.

“No, no, no,” said Emi as tears formed in her eyes.

Looking at her face-to-face, the draw became even stronger. Something about her was familiar. Hazuki felt almost as though he was looking at his distorted reflection in choppy water.

“Do I know you?” he asked.

Emi shook her head and turned as though to leave.

“I can’t do this,” she said out loud.

“Wait!” called Hazuki.

Emi didn’t stop.

“You know about Naoe don’t you!” he yelled as she tried to distance herself.

Naoe’s name caused the elderly woman to stop. Even with her back to him, Hazuki could tell that the woman had started to cry. Hazuki limped towards her.

“Stay away, please,” said Emi.

Hazuki stopped, not wanting to get in trouble or overstep his bounds.

“Please, I need to know. Do you know Naoe?” pleaded Hazuki.

The woman didn’t answer. Her tears stopped after a moment and a cold, distant look overtook her face. Finally, she turned to Hazuki once more with masked eyes.

“I don’t know that name,” she said with a lie that even Hazuki could see through.

With that, she turned and continued. Frustration caused Hazuki to lose focus and he stood there fighting with himself trying to figure out what to do as the one person who might help him began to exit. Desperation took over.

“Naoe is in pain! I had a dream of her whimpering in the dark, harnessed to thousands of roots!” he shouted angrily.

That stopped her once again.

“It felt like she was being drained of all her life force as she lay there whimpering. It felt like she was dying! And I need to help her! So fucking help me if you know something!” growled Hazuki as despair overtook clarity.

Emi turned slowly and seemed to be trying to gather her words.

“What’s wrong with Naoe?” asked Hazuki as his rage transformed into sadness.

Emi didn’t speak for several seconds, then finally made up her mind.

“It’s our fault,” she said.

Hazuki didn’t understand.

“No, it’s my fault. But if I tell you, it will become your fault too,” warned Emi.

Sorrow was evident in her voice and eyes. So much so that Hazuki knew she was telling the truth, even if he did not yet understand.

“What do you mean?” asked Hazuki.

Emi hesitated then spoke.

“I’m sorry, Naoe,” she whispered.

Hazuki didn’t move or break eye contact with Emi once her gaze returned to his.

“Please,” he pleaded.

Clouds drifted in front of the sun, draining the color and light from the world. Standing there before this stranger that he somehow felt connected to, Hazuki begged the universe that clarity and answers were about to arrive, no matter how painful. Emi inhaled nervously.

“I don’t know all of the details. I cannot claim to understand. But what I DO know is that Naoe was never meant to be permanently attached to that tree. She was just an aeon. Meant to be that tree’s spiritual guardian for only a certain period of time. But for whatever reason, she never passed on her mantle to the next aeon.”

Words blended in Hazuki’s mind and Emi spoke, creating more questions but also guiding him to certain implied conclusions that began to unsettle his entire being.

"I... I don't fully understand..." he admitted.

“I do not know if there were aeons before Naoe that passed the mantle onto her, or if she was the first and has never given up the burden. But every generation, a new aeon appears.”

Emi’s eyes were becoming dark and borderline spiteful as she stared into Hazuki’s soul and spoke her revelations. The spite did not seem directed at Hazuki though, it seemed to be for Emi herself. Even though he feared his words, he spoke the questions he was gathering.

“So the few people who can see Naoe. One of them is the aeon of that generation?” he asked.

Emi nodded. Hazuki’s hands began to tremble.

"Only those with a very strong connection to these trees can see her. But yes, one of those people is the aeon," explained Emi.

“You were the last aeon, but Naoe never passed on the burden to you?” he whispered.

Emi nodded again as self-loathing washed over her face.

“She told me she had never asked someone to take the burden, but all those years ago, she was finally starting to break. After generations of carrying that mantle alone, her spirit was giving out.”

Suddenly Hazuki understood the mystery of the soil degradation. He also began to piece together the next part of the story and why Emi had so suddenly retired years ago. Why she was so full of self-hate now.

“Naoe told me the truth and asked me to take on the mantle; to continue the cycle. But I refused. I was too afraid, and I did not want to face potentially hundreds of years alone and in pain. So I ran away. I left her to continue suffering. That is my great sin,” said Emi as tears ran down her face.

Hate clawed its way into Hazuki’s mind and wrestled for space amidst the sorrow, confusion, and realization. Tremors shook through his whole body as the world around him began to blur. Hazuki shook his head clear but finally looked away from Emi out of fear he might wish death on her right then and there. Echoes of Naoe’s pain seemed to bounce off the trees around them as the wind blew in gathering gusts.

“You were supposed to be the aeon, but you betrayed her when she finally asked for help…” he whispered.

“Yes,” answered Emi.

“And now, it's been long enough, and a new aeon is supposed to take over,” he murmured, almost to himself.

“Yes,” said Emi.

Now Hazuki understood why he could see Emi so clearly in that grove. Now he understood why he could see Naoe. Now he understood why Naoe always seemed to be hiding a sad secret every time she looked at him. Now he understood why it had always seemed like she was shielding him from some unforeseen force. Now he understood why the roots in his dreams were always there pulling him to her and to the abyss.

“I’m the next aeon, aren’t I?” he asked in defeat.

“...Yes,” said the old woman.