Not For Us

“So this is the place?” Hazel asks as we approach a small village along the cliff of the mountains.

“That’s right,” Iris says, “the orders said to go to the city of Desmarra.”

Hazel looks around at the barren place and asks, “City? But there’s no one here.”

The makeshift fort that surrounded the village was almost completely empty, and instead of tall buildings there were small homes and makeshift houses.

“They’re probably on the inside, y’know, where the main city is,” Iris says in a playfully sarcastic manner.

“Inside?”

“Yes, the cities of the mountains are mostly built inside the large caves we carve out. It gives us more room to build and it provides us protection from the cold during the winter,” she explains, “and it gets really cold up here. So if you’re unimpressed by what you see so far, just wait until we get inside, it’s a thousand times more impressive, wouldn’t you agree Lily?”

I looked up at her, interrupting my long chain of thoughts.

“Hmm? Oh yeah, I’ve been to a few cities in the mountains,” I recall, “including the city of Sacromos where Iris came from, and she’s right—from what I remember the mountain cities are a lot more impressive than how they look from the outside.”

“Heh, I’ll take your word for it then,” Hazel says before stopping to take a scarf out of her pocket and wrapping it around my neck. “There,” she said, “you were looking a little down just now, and I figured you might be cold. Is everything alright Lily?”

I slowly nodded my head.

“Yeah,” I replied, “thanks.”

A few months had passed since Dahlia’s death and both her and Hyacinth were still on my mind. It was still hard for me to accept that they were gone forever, and I couldn’t understand why nobody else seemed to be bothered by it. I didn’t want to bring it up however, because I didn’t want to seem like someone who was depressed.

Maybe it’s because they’re older, I reasoned, maybe that’s why they seem so unbothered by it. Do we start to care less about things like that as we age? Perhaps it’s better for me to just ignore it like them.

The four of us continued walking until we reached a wide cave entrance that stood over a few meters tall. As we got closer, the sounds of people talking and laughing became louder and louder, and it was only then that I noticed how quiet it was before.

When we finally make it inside, Hazel lets out an audible breath as she takes in the sight before her.

Within the walls of the vast cavern, were towering buildings and structures made of stone and golden minerals. Sharp and intimidating stalactites jut out from the roof, with lanterns and shining jewels hanging from their tips, lighting up the city alongside its colorful street lamps that paint it in vibrant hues of blue, purple, and pink.

Flowers such as red poppies and yellow marigolds grew from the cavern walls, and colorful trees such as purple jacarandas and pink rose trumpets decorated the streets between each building. The city center was lively and full of life, filled with children playing in the streets and adults moving about, and amongst them all were other Espers just like us, each with their distinct hair color and specific animal trait.

Iris takes a deep breath and breathes in the sweet scent of the rosy air around her.

“Ahh, this brings me back to my hometown,” she says as Hazel continues to gawk and struggle to comprehend how cities such as this one were common across the mountain range.

“Are you not surprised by this too, Peony?” Hazel asks.

Peony shrugs.

“It’s not the first time I’ve been stationed in the mountains before,” she replied, “it seems like this is only new to you.”

“Your family never took a vacation to the mountains before?” I asked, wondering how there was a place a rich family like hers hasn’t been to yet.

“Ahaha… my parents weren’t really the type to take vacations,” Hazel explained, “for them it’s always been work, work, work, and for us children it was always study, study, study so that we could continue our legacy as the finest doctors in the south.”

Iris gives her a pat on the back.

“Well aren’t you glad to get a chance to see a city as beautiful as this?” Iris asks with a smile, “and just in time for the festival too.”

“Festival?” the three of us ask in unison.

Iris looks at me in shock.

“I expected the other two to not know but you, Lily? You don’t know what the Equinox Festival is?”

“Equinox Festival…” I quietly murmur as I try to recall it, “I think I remember hearing something about that during my few visits to the mountain cities, but I don’t think I’ve celebrated it before. Maybe if I look back at one of my pictures I can recall it, but I don’t remember coming to the mountains around this time of year.”

“Hmm, well that’s okay,” she says, “I don’t mind explaining it to y'all. As the name implies, the Equinox Festival is celebrated every spring equinox, and the main event involves blowing a giant horn that calls out across the mountains. The blowing of the horn signifies new beginnings, rebirth, and honor for the hard-working who died that year, and the blower is chosen through an ice-breaking competition we hold on the morning of the festival. The winner of the competition is decided by who breaks the most of the remaining winter ice, and they get to pick who blows the horn—although it’s typically tradition that they pick their child or another if they don’t have one, because it’s more symbolic to the ‘new beginnings’ thing.”

She pauses for a moment as if recalling a distant memory.

“Y’know, you don’t really understand how powerfully silencing the sound of the horn is,” she continues in an awe-struck voice, “maybe not just one horn, but imagine the combined sound of hundreds of horns being blown at the same time across the mountain cities at night. It’s enough to bring even the most cold-hearted of people to tears, even if they haven’t lost anyone that year… but…”

“But…?” Hazel asks.

“The horns don’t blow for us Espers.”

“...What do you mean by that?”

“I mean that even if an Esper dies on the mountains, they are buried someplace else so that the horns don’t honor them,” Iris explains, “the horns only honor you if you have a grave with your name written on it in the mountains, so they either bury Espers some place else or don’t mark their graves.”

“But… why…?” I ask.

“Because it’s tradition. The horns are only meant to honor those who work hard, but because Espers like us are born with special abilities, the people believe that we don’t work hard like the average person does.”

“I get where they’re coming from but that’s a very narrow-minded way of thinking,” Peony says, “why do you continue to stay and live in the mountains while knowing this?”

Iris turns to look at the sunset-colored city before speaking in a distant tone, “because when I first started working as a counselor, a student of mine once promised me that when I die, he’ll make sure that the horns blow for me.”

The group looks at her in silence for a moment before Hazel remarks, “wow… that’s a bold promise. You must’ve meant a lot to him, for him to declare something like that.”

Iris snorts and says, “but even though he made that promise, as soon as he graduated, he moved away and continued on with his life, so as sweet as his promise was, it was just a childish declaration. He was a troublesome student after all—everyone I took care of was—but he in particular was pretty tough, especially on the other teachers.”

“Then why do you keep staying then?” I asked.

“I say it was childish but… in actuality, something about the way he said it makes me want to believe him. Perhaps a part of me wishes that his declaration was true—that the horns will blow for me when I die one day—or perhaps a part of me wanted to believe that he’ll become someone that actually keeps the promises he makes; something he had always struggled with. Whatever it is, I still believe him, even 17 years later.”

The three of us silently peer into her with eager eyes as if pressuring her to reveal more. As much as she loved talking to us about her past students and experiences, she had never shown this side of herself to any of us before, even though the topic seemed really important to her.

Seeing as how even Peony was intrigued, Iris sighs and says, “17 years ago…”