A date on the cinema.

"I am not sure if I am capable of understanding emotions like love. I don't want to hurt you, but that isn't enough to say that I can love you. I don't know what answer is proper in a situation like this one. let's know each other better." said Grace smirking.

"Let me take you to a date. then we can see if there is something." said Bernard.

"Yeah. let's do that." said Grace with the most beautifully melancholic smile.

.............

Bernard wakes up sweating. he was having a dream. he can't believe that it's Saturday already and today is the big day. they agreed on going to the cinema. Bernard blushes as he thinks of the things they can do together. it's time to prove his love.

Bernard stands up. he looks at a copy of the Count of Monte Cristo. it is on the ground. there are some bloodstains on the book. he has problems breathing. he feels nauseous. his skin turns pale. he is sweating. his vision becomes unfocused. he falls on his knees. he feels like throwing up. he grabs a small trashcan. then he throws up.

there are tears on his face. he looks at a reflection of his face in a mirror. there is something that he sees in there. something that he doesn't recognize. it's vicious. a cruel joke from the past coming to ruin his life. he feels disgusted just thinking about the past.

Bernard closes his eyes. he tries to clear his mind. he breathes in. breathes out. then he stands up almost running goes to the bathroom. he takes a quick shower. then pulls out his better outfits as he tries to find the right one. he decided to go on a tuxedo.

after styling his hair like Elvis. he feels ready. then he walks towards his date. he is walking peacefully ninety minutes before his date. he looks at his watch. everything is fine. some bad ideas come to mind. he starts to question himself. he starts to feel inferior. he doubts if he will ever be man enough for a person like Grace. he starts to think about turning away.

as Bernard keeps thinking about the worse. Grace comes out of nowhere. she is wearing a beautiful long white dress with blue details in the lower half. the dress looks like the galaxy embracing her beauty. she is hoping to have a fun day.

Grace asks if he is ready. the movie won't start for a while. they decide to just walk around and talk about any topic that can come to mind. during that time Bernard feels nervous as he feels a voice breathing in his neck. he swallows saliva. he pretends to be fine. but there is something stopping him from embracing what was given.

Grace notices that something is off. but she decides to ignore it. it isn't her problem. she has her own set of issues. there are things unresolved awaiting at home. then there is the whole issue about her ex. Pierre has been suspicious and too silent lately. the way in which he acts sometimes is too absurd. there is something hidden in there.

after some time. they finally go towards the cinema. the movie Bernard carefully selected was a romance movie with a Science-Fiction setting. based on some reviews he can say that the movie has enough story aside from the romance to stay dynamic and fun.

they get some popcorn and soda. then they walk towards their seats. they ignore the previews of other movies as they talk to each other. the movie starts. they observe it. 

Grace was able to immerse herself on the movie. she felt a deep connection. a fugitive tear dares to escape without her noticing. the story was so impactful to her. in less than one hundred minutes Grace was able to make all kind of faces.

on the other hand, Bernard wasn't able to pay much attention to the movie. it was just fine with a pretty entertaining plot. but he couldn't stop thinking about certain things. he then looks at Grace every once in a while. 

the movie finally ends. they leave the cinema. Grace was smiling. she was commenting on every detail she found fascinating about the movie. they go to a cafe. they have some drinks and some sweets. Bernard was absent minded at times.

Grace questions if she is the issue. he was so excited before. he is the one who wanted the date in the first place. why does it feel like she is the one who was desperate for this to happen? when is he going to open up about his issues? why is she so angry?

"Can you fucking tell me what the issue is?" almost yields Grace.

"It isn't anything important. we can talk later." said Bernard forcing a smile.

"If you say so. let's go have some fun. for today at least." said Grace feeling wronged.

"Look, Frank. it's the library kid. he is on a date with his girl. lucky bastard. Franky you're better looking, and you still get no bitches." said someone entering the cafe.

Bernard and Grace leave. they go to a park. they walk around there. they observe the bright clear sky. the animated voices of kids and parents. the dogs walking around. the smell of grass and nature. the gentle touch of the wind. the peaceful and calm noises.

they have a simple conversation. they try to know more about each other. but the conversation is superficial. they don't allow themselves to talk more than what is enough. there are wounds that are too deep to let others touch them. there are secrets that are intimate.

Grace notices once more that something is off. she can't keep going on with this act without knowing what is happening. she feels ready to leave. but Bernard stops her. he asks her for a final stop before they end their date. he wants to go to a restaurant to eat.

"Fine. one final stop and we're done." said Grace feeling emotionally exhausted.

the restaurant was fine. Bernard probably wasted all his savings in this one date. he hopes for the final stop to be good. he feels like he is losing to Pierre. 

they are eating. things are moving at a better speed. Grace orders pasta with lobster. they eat silently at first. then they talk about random things. Bernard is finally feeling like himself putting aside the past. he can move on. then a phantom comes from behind the phantom whisper terrors on his ear. Bernard tries to keep himself normal. but he breaks the act.

Grace is done with the pretending game. he seems unwillingly to talk. she has better things to do than to deal with his childishness. she has an actual job to do. but there he is getting on her way and not even letting her know what is wrong. she feels offended.

Grace walks away. Bernard follows. he tries to explain himself. she ignores him. Bernard tries to stop her with words. she isn't listening anymore. he feels desperate. he feels like the phantom was right all along. he runs towards Grace. he steps in front of her.

"I don't care." she said as she keeps walking.

Bernard is facing her back. he feels like she is going to disappear. he feels the need to communicate what he feels. he is sweating. it seems like he is about to have an episode of anxiety and a panic attack. Bernard looking away prepares to scream.

"I KILLED MY FATHER." Bernard yields with all the pain of his heart.

Grace stops. she turns around. she looks at Bernard broken in tears. he cries loudly as he stares at the sky. it's the middle of the day. but he can feel it. he can feel the moon watching over him like every night. he cries his lungs out as he feels pathetic.

Grace tries to approach him. she doesn't know what to do. she kneels. she hugs him. Grace may not know what love means. but she knows what sympathy means. she wants to be at his side for the meantime.

 who cares what love truly is. what Grace knows is that they need each other. they depend on a twisted relationship of common interest to fulfill a requirement of life. Grace can keep learning about life or love, or sorrows. she can learn at his side. next to Bernard.