Reintegrated

Although I had only been gone a day, the atmosphere in the Pocket had changed. On the surface, people were happier now that we had plenty of food. My father had thought to steal some seeds as well as food supplies, and the couple of Life mages we had were confident they could use their magic to grow crops, even though the Pocket had no sun.

However, it felt like people were worried. I had only been gone a day, and I had nearly lost my life. Worse still, the Empire now knew the location of the Portal in the real world. Nobody was sure if imperial soldiers would set up a watch on the portal or not, which meant plenty of people quietly speculated that if we ever tried to leave again, we’d have to fight our way through an army.

Although, realistically, what made people most nervous was…from where I stood in the courtyard doing my meditation, I glanced at Shemman and Jepha. The brothers were dutifully watering the garden planted with the new seeds. Whenever one of the mages passed by, Shemman politely nodded and wished them a good morning. The mages, invariably, didn’t reply, and sped up to get away from the brothers. I sighed. Yeah, I had gotten used to having the brothers around, but most of the other mages had barely thought about the prisoners. They weren’t used to having a pair of Aijalon living among them.

Meals were the same. Shemman and Jepha quietly ate in a distant corner of the dining room, while all the mages tried to give them as wide a berth as possible. I wanted to sit with them, but me, my father, and Bekah always ate together. It was some of the only time we spent together as a family; I got the feeling my father wouldn’t appreciate me breaking up our family time to sit with the boys he still viewed as enemies. The brothers always finished their meals quickly. I noticed that Shemman always left about half his food uneaten. He took his plate of food outside the dining room, presumably to feed Rubia.

Bekah, following my gaze, noted “just like you always did for them.” She spoke quietly, which I appreciated. But I did not appreciate the fact that she leaned in to do so, and her mouth was full when she spoke, so as a result she splattered asparagus on my ear.

**

I finally got my chance to talk with Shemman after training the next day. Granny had me quit early, claiming she wanted more time to examine the state of the portal, so I had plenty of free time. After wandering around the Pocket for a while, I spotted Shemman in a corner of the Pocket behind the buildings, right next to the solid grey mist that formed the Pocket’s walls.

When I found him, he was performing a series of movements with a pair of long daggers. It wasn’t a combat drill, exactly—those flips, twirls, and flourishes would be useless in a real fight. In fact, it looked more like a dance, only with movements that would cut down his partner. I watched, transfixed by his graceful movements.

His dance came to an end. He bowed to an imaginary audience, then turned to me. “Hello, Rakel,” he said, wiping the sweat from his brow.

“Hey.”

He sat down, leaning his back to the Pocket wall. He patted the ground next to him. I sat next to him. I asked “what were you doing?”

“Kata. It’s a stylized routine.”

“What’s it for?”

He took a moment to think about the answer. “Some in the warrior monasteries use it as an art form. Others use it as a sort of cross-training to complement more practical combat training. I use it to relax and to pray to the One Who Is.” He smiled. “What is you your mind?”

“What makes you think I have something on my mind?” I asked playfully.

“Well, you sought me out, did you not? Unless, of course, you merely desired to behold my gorgeous form?” He struck a pose; it made him look ridiculous. We both laughed. “But in seriousness, I understand if things are strange between us. We expected to never see each other again. And before we left for the real world, you had said…ah, right.” He lapsed into silence.

My face flushed red at the memory of my confession to him, and his rejection. And he was right: it was strange seeing him again.

But sitting here next to him once again felt so right. At this moment, I didn’t care about the awkwardness between us. “It’s good to see you again,” I blurted out. Immediately, I felt stupid. This wasn’t the first time we’d seen each other since returning to the Pocket; it wasn’t even the first time we’d seen each other today.

Despite how dumb my comment was, Shemman smiled. “It is good to see you too, Rakel.”

Trying to change the subject, I quickly said “say, what did you do in the real world, before you met up with us?”

“Jepha and I reported to the military station. They weren’t sure what to do with us at first—they could tell we were truly Aijalon, but we had long been presumed dead or deserters. They put us in a holding cell for a while.”

“From one cell to another, eh?”

“There is no compare. The cell here in the Pocket at least has the benefit of good conversation.” I flushed just a bit at the complement. “You ever try to speak with an imperial guard? Most of them are as chatty as a brick wall, and less pretty to look at.

“As it turned out, Rubia had been sent to that base for an unrelated reason. She got us out an hour later.” He paused to think. “After that, Rubia got Jepha and I dinner, where we heard the report of a pair of children who had met a strange girl in the woods. Rubia speculated it was a mage. Jepha and I trailed her to the woods where we saw you fighting. You know the rest.”

So Rubia was in the habit of buying Shemman dinner, huh? “Who exactly is that girl?”

“Rubia? She is a fellow Aijalon. We studied at the same warrior monastery.”

I sighed. Was he being dense on purpose, or did he really not understand my meaning? “I mean, what is your relationship to her? During the fight, she called you ‘Darling.’”

“Oh, that’s because we were engaged.”

A beat passed. Then another. It wasn’t until the third that my brain had reactivated enough to speak. “Engaged?”

“Yes.”

“To be married?”

“Yes, that is what engaged means.”

Another beat passed. I don’t even want to know what my face must have looked like, because Shemman continued “among the Aijalon, it is not uncommon for families to engage their children from a young age. Truthfully, I never felt any desire to marry Rubia. I would do it out of loyalty to our people, but I cannot imagine spending a lifetime with her. I respect her as a warrior, but as a person she is a tad…”

“Intense?” I offered.

“Murderous. Villainous.”

“Yeah, that tracks.”

Shemman sighed. “So, I never took the prospect of marriage with her seriously.”

I thought back to how she had spoken during the fight at the portal. “She seemed to take the idea pretty seriously, though.”

Shemman didn’t answer, but had a concerned frown on his face.

Marriage, huh… tradition dictated that mages only marry other mages, to increase the chance of their offspring having the gift of magic. I had a hazy idea my father and Granny expected me to fulfil that tradition. I had never met a mage boy my age, although I supposed there were some in other mage communities around the Empire. So I had never given much serious thought to marriage.

Trying to change the subject, I said “well, forget about marriage; what are you planning on doing when you get back to the real world?”

“I do not know,” Shemman answered, his troubled frown deepening. “The soldiers have no doubt reported that I fought on your side. I have likely been branded a traitor to my people, so I cannot return to them.”

Oh. I hadn’t even thought of that. In fighting to protect me, not only had he risked his life, but his reputation. “Shemman, I’m sorry.”

“Do not be. I made my choice to fight for my friend. I knew the consequences.” He smiled, but there was a pain in that smile. That smile made my heart beat so fast I was surprised he couldn’t hear it.

I pushed myself off the ground. “Well! That was a nice talk. I have to go now. To do a thing. Bye!”

“Oh, all right. Farewell, Rakel.” I waved goodbye and rushed around the corner of the building, where I sank to the ground. My heart beat and my face flushed at Shemman’s gallantry; my feelings for him were stronger than ever. I know he had rejected me, but I couldn’t help it. “Ah, man,” I softly moaned to myself, cradling my head in my hands. Having Shemman back was wonderful, but also painful, in its own way.