Day 2: Ava

Last night, I saw the news — and I couldn’t believe it.

Why? Why now? Why does it have to be in my lifetime? Why do I have to be the one to suffer? I have done so much, this is not the time to die. What the hell…

The next morning, I woke up feeling as hopeless as ever. Last night, I had been celebrating the fact that I was able to get into medical school—my dream finally within reach. But I guess that didn’t matter anymore. I lay there, staring at the ceiling, unable to move. My limbs felt heavy. My chest felt tight. My vision blurred. I felt something wet rolling down my cheeks. And before I even realized, I started crying. Of course I was crying. My life was going so well. Everything I had worked for was destroyed, and it was something out of my control. I spent my entire life being the best person I could: studying hard, constantly working out, being nice to others, making all the right choices. I wanted to be the best version of myself so when I die I can say that I lived a fulfilling life. But no matter how hard you try, no matter how many right choices you make, there’s no guarantee that life will go your way. It’s sad to see now that all of that was for nothing. All my efforts have gone to waste and I’ve wasted my life pursuing a dream I can never truly achieve. All my friends, all my family, all my effort. Will be gone in 364 days.

I wallowed in that thought for over an hour until a random text popped up on my phone. I glanced over at my phone, unable to find the strength to pick it up. I stared at my phone for a moment before finally mustering up the strength to pick it up. It was Leo.

Hey, I was wondering if you wanted to hangout today?

Weird — we weren’t even that close. Just coworkers so it’s an odd request. I stared at the message, wondering if I should go. I still have class to get to… but there would be no point now I guess. I picked up my phone and sent him a message

                    Sure, where and when should we meet up?

In like 2 hours? At the cafe near the restaurant?

                                                                                              Sure

If I’m going to die anyways then I’ll just keep killing time till my end comes. Maybe by then, I can welcome it with open arms.

I sat up staring out at my window…

I guess I’ll get ready now.

I got out of bed, took a shower, brushed my teeth, went through the motions. I later picked out my clothes. It didn’t take long for me to decide what to wear. My room was well organized and everything was where it needed to be. Another way of being the best version of myself, neat and efficient. While staring at my organized room something shifted. I got mad. It reminded me of how much effort I put into my life.

All this order, all that effort… all for what?

I walked over to my desk and stared at the picture on the table. It was my friend Sam, before summer started she invited me to go to Japan with her. It was supposed to be our high school graduation trip. She said something like “You can’t miss out, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity!” But I insisted on staying home because I wanted to take summer classes so I could get ahead in college. I knew that sacrificing one measly summer would be worth it because it was another way of securing my future.

I should’ve gone with her. Why the hell did I pass up this opportunity? Did I even enjoy that summer? Did I waste my time?

I started crying all over again.

DAMMIT! WHY DOES THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN?

I grabbed the picture and threw it at the wall with all my strength. The frame shattered. I put my body into that throw and ended up falling onto the ground. I curled up. Crying.

I should’ve gone on that trip with her…

I arrived at the café a little early. It was a small, cozy place—family-owned, quiet. Because of the news last night, the cafe was empty except for the owner at the front. He was an old man and he seemed happy. The old man was probably going to die soon anyway so this meteor changed nothing for him. But I wonder, why he isn’t spending time with his family. I walked up and asked for a coffee. He nodded and said it was on the house. What a kind old man he was. As he prepared the drink, he hummed to himself. Soft, content. Like there wasn’t a single problem in the world.

How could someone be this happy right now? But maybe it made sense. He wasn’t my age. His life was already lived.

“Is something bothering you ma’am?” Looks like he caught me staring at him.

“Yeah, the end of the world kind of sort of has me on edge.”

“Yeah I get that,” he replied, still sounding as happy as ever.

I squinted my eyes, not bothering to hide my suspicions. “Really? You seem pretty happy to me.”

He shrugged, “Well, I’m doing what I love. Hard to be sad when you’re exactly where you want to be.”

I crossed my arms. “Aren’t you upset at all?”

He paused mid stir, “I am. The thought that my grandchildren will never be able to grow up aches my heart but…” he looked up at me, “we only have a limited time left. So there’s no need to use that time being sad.”

Blindly being happy doesn’t change the fact that we’re going to die!” I retorted.

A heavy silence followed. The hum of the coffee machine filled the gap.

I let out a sigh, “sorry for raising my voice.”

“No need to apologize,” he said with a reassuring smile, “But to me nothing has changed. Everyday isn’t a guarantee so I just like to live life how I like… all the way until my death. Even now, we aren’t guaranteed to see the meteor. Car crash, heart attack—who knows? We could die a day, a week, or even a month before it hits. That’s always been true. So I choose to live the way I want, all the way to the end.”

I blinked at his answer not knowing what to say. Even if he is right it still doesn’t change the hopelessness I feel at the moment.

“Here,” he said as he handed me the coffee.

I looked down at the coffee staring at my own reflection, “T-thanks.”

I walked to a table and sat down, the mug warm between my hands. Just as I took a sip, what a beautiful day it was. I was so focused on the meteor I had missed this fact. I continue to stare out the window and I spotted someone running. It was Leo. I noticed that his clothes still had price tags on it.

You’ve gotta be kidding me.

He burst through the door, scanned the room, and when his eyes landed on me, he lit up—smiling wide, waving like an idiot. This can’t be Leo, he normally has such a gloomy look at work. Something’s changed about him. He jogged over and plopped into the seat across from me, grinning like this was the best day of his life.

“Hey, sorry I was a little late.” he says while panting.

“Yeah, no worries. So why did you want to meet up again?”

“I just wanted to tell you that…”

“That?”

He exhales sharply, almost like he’s bracing himself. “I like you, Ava. I really do. And… I’d like to go out with you.”

I blink. “W-what? What’re you talking about?” He can’t be serious

He glances away, rubbing the back of his neck. His foot taps against the floor. “Exactly what I said. I’m asking you out.”

He isn’t joking. What the hell? 

“You do know that we’re all going to die right?” I ask

“Yes, that’s exactly why I’m here.”

“So that’s it? You just want fun before the world ends?”

He leans forward, voice calm but firm. “No. I’m asking because there’s an end. I want to enjoy whatever time I have left—with someone I admire.”

“Fun? Is that the only reason you’re asking me out?”

He gives a half-smile, but his eyes don’t joke. “Partly. But also… you’re kind. You work hard. You glow when you talk about the future—even now, I can still see that version of you. That’s why I wanted to be around you. But lately…” He trails off, then adds, “You don’t seem like her anymore.”

That hit a nerve. My throat tightens. “How can you smile like this? Don’t you get it? We’re going to die. There’s nothing left. No med school. No future. No point.”

“There are all the reasons to be happy right now!” he says with an excited grin on his face, “Since we’re going to die anyways let's have as much fun as possible! 365 days, that’s all we have left, so lets enjoy it.”

“That’s bullshit,” I snapped. “You were miserable before and now you’re acting like you’ve found enlightenment because of a death sentence?”

“Yeah, it is,” he shrugs, honest. “But that's exactly why I'm so happy.”

“This is insane.” I stand. “I’m leaving.”

I stood up and walked away from Leo. “WAIT!” he shouted.

I look back at him, “What now?”

“I think you’re the insane one here.”

My jaws tightened and my eyes snapped up with a sharp glare, “What’d you say?”

“You heard me.” His voice shakes a little, but he presses on. “You’ve been waiting your whole life to be happy. Now you’re quitting because the ending’s uncertain?”

“No. What you’re doing is idiotic and not worth the time. And the ending is certain, we're going to die.”

"That's always been the case," he argued.

"Yeah but what you're doing now is stupid."

"Is it now?"

"Yes, yes it is."

A mischievous grin appeared on his face. “If you’re so sure, walk away. But just know that you're completely wrong."

“Wrong?!” I snapped at him. “So you think you know better? That you can just drag me into your fantasy world and I’ll magically be okay?”

“Yup, wrong.” he said while crossing his arms and grinning.

“I’m not…”

“Yes you are.” He let out a shaky breath and smiled—too wide, like it was holding something back. “And even if you were right, then you wouldn't even get to enjoy it. Both of us die, but at least one of us won’t regret how they spent their last year.”

His happiness, I wasn’t sure if I hated it or envied it. Maybe both. Thinking back to this morning, I didn’t want to sit alone in a silent room again. So I said the first stupid thing that came to mind.

I stared at him. “Then let’s make a bet.”

“I’m listening,” he said while leaning in, still with a smug expression.

“You get nine months to prove me wrong. If I admit you’re right—really admit it—I’ll do you one favor. Whatever you want.”

He grins. “And if you’re right?”

“You’ll owe me three months of servitude. Coffee runs, errands, whatever I want. You’ll be my servant.”

“Assuming I’ll lose?”

“You will.”

“Fine, I accept. When do we start?”

“Today, I guess”

As he grabbed my arm with a smile on his face, he exclaimed, “Let’s go then!”

Being dragged by the arm I ask, “Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise,” he answers with a smile.

I have a strange feeling about this bet…