Chapter 10: The Guardian's Guide to Grub

The Department of Extradimensional Affairs, under the newly appointed (and still slightly bewildered) leadership of Corvus Quill, was slowly but surely returning to a semblance of order. The sentient filing cabinets had been properly exorcised (with a sternly worded memo and a liberal application of industrial-strength disinfectant), the rogue staplers had been apprehended (and sentenced to community service sorting paperclips), and the interdimensional travel requests were, for the most part, being processed in a timely manner (defined as "within a standard Aethelian week").

Corvus, however, found himself increasingly restless. The thrill of thwarting an invasion and reforming a corrupt bureaucracy had begun to fade, replaced by a nagging sense of unease. The mention of the "Guardian" in the translated messages from Diligence had piqued his curiosity, and he couldn't shake the feeling that there was a larger, more sinister threat looming on the horizon.

"We need to find this Guardian," Corvus said, pacing back and forth in his office (he had finally succumbed to the allure of the velvet upholstery and claimed the Director's office as his own). "If the Superior Authority was so interested in controlling it, it must be incredibly powerful."

"Zinnia is working on it," Rivet said, adjusting his goggles. "She's been poring over ancient texts, deciphering cryptic runes, and even consulting with a few interdimensional fortune tellers. But so far, no luck."

"I've also been asking around my contacts in the extradimensional community," Umbral rumbled. "But no one seems to know anything about a Guardian. It's as if it's a myth, a legend, a story told to scare unruly goblins."

"Well, myths and legends often have a basis in reality," Corvus said. "We just need to find the truth behind the story."

He paused, thinking. "Maybe we're approaching this the wrong way," he said. "Instead of focusing on the Guardian's power, maybe we should focus on its purpose. What is it supposed to be protecting Aethel from?"

"That's a good question," Rivet said. "But how do we find the answer?"

"We need to consult an expert," Corvus said. "Someone who knows Aethel's history, its magic, and its secrets."

He snapped his fingers. "I know just the person," he said. "Professor Eldrune, the foremost authority on Aethelian folklore and mythology. He's a bit eccentric, but he's brilliant."

Professor Eldrune lived in a secluded cottage on the outskirts of Aethel City, surrounded by a sprawling garden filled with strange and exotic plants. He was a wizened old man, with a long, white beard, twinkling eyes, and a penchant for wearing mismatched socks.

Corvus, Rivet, and Umbral arrived at the cottage and were greeted by Professor Eldrune himself.

"Welcome, welcome!" he exclaimed, his voice high-pitched and enthusiastic. "I've been expecting you. I've had a feeling that something extraordinary was about to happen."

He led them into his cottage, which was even more cluttered and chaotic than his garden. Books lined the walls, scrolls were scattered across the floor, and strange artifacts were displayed on every available surface.

"Please, make yourselves comfortable," Professor Eldrune said, gesturing towards a pile of cushions on the floor. "I'm afraid I don't have any chairs. They tend to get eaten by the grumbleweeds."

Corvus, Rivet, and Umbral settled onto the cushions, trying to avoid the various insects and fungi that were growing on them.

"Professor Eldrune," Corvus said, "we need your help. We're trying to find the Guardian."

Professor Eldrune's eyes widened. "The Guardian?" he said, his voice filled with awe. "You seek the protector of Aethel? The one who stands between us and the forces of darkness?"

"That's the one," Corvus said. "We believe that Aethel is facing a new threat, and we need the Guardian's help to defend it."

Professor Eldrune nodded, his face grave. "The Guardian is a powerful being," he said. "But it is also elusive. It does not reveal itself easily."

"Do you know anything about its identity or its location?" Corvus asked.

"I know only what is written in the ancient texts," Professor Eldrune said. "The Guardian is said to be a shapeshifter, capable of taking on any form it chooses. It can be a human, an animal, a plant, or even an inanimate object."

"So, it could be anyone, or anything?" Rivet asked, his voice filled with disbelief.

"Precisely," Professor Eldrune said. "The Guardian could be standing right next to you, and you wouldn't even know it."

"That's not very helpful," Corvus said, sighing. "Is there anything else you can tell us?"

"The ancient texts also speak of the Guardian's weakness," Professor Eldrune said. "It is said to be vulnerable to a certain type of… street food."

Corvus stared at Professor Eldrune, his eyes widening in surprise. "Street food?" he said. "You're telling me that the protector of Aethel is vulnerable to… tacos?"

"Not just any street food," Professor Eldrune said. "The texts specifically mention 'Interdimensional Grub'. It is said to be the Guardian's one true weakness."

"Interdimensional Grub?" Rivet asked, scratching his head. "What is that?"

"It is a delicacy, a culinary masterpiece, a symphony of flavors that transcends the boundaries of space and time," Professor Eldrune said, his eyes gleaming with excitement. "It is a dish so delicious, so irresistible, that even the Guardian cannot resist its allure."

"Where can we find this Interdimensional Grub?" Corvus asked.

"There is only one place in Aethel where it is served," Professor Eldrune said. "The Grub Hub, a small street food stall located in the heart of Aethel City."

The Grub Hub was a chaotic and vibrant street food stall, located in a bustling marketplace in Aethel City. The air was thick with the aroma of exotic spices, sizzling meats, and bubbling sauces. The stall was run by a jovial, rotund goblin named Grizelda, who was known throughout Aethel for her culinary creations.

Corvus, Rivet, and Umbral approached the Grub Hub, their senses overwhelmed by the sights, sounds, and smells of the marketplace.

"This place is insane," Rivet said, adjusting his goggles. "I don't even know where to start."

"We're looking for Interdimensional Grub," Corvus said to Grizelda, who was busy flipping a batch of sizzling grumbleburgers.

Grizelda looked up, her eyes widening in surprise. "Interdimensional Grub?" she said, her voice raspy and enthusiastic. "You have good taste! It's the most popular dish on the menu."

"We need to know everything about it," Corvus said. "What's in it? Where does it come from? And why is it so special?"

Grizelda grinned. "Interdimensional Grub is a secret recipe," she said. "But I can tell you this: it's made with ingredients from all over the extradimensional universe. We've got grumbleberries from the Forest of Fungi, squirming noodles from the Planet of Slime, and a secret sauce that's been passed down through my family for generations."

"And why is it so delicious?" Rivet asked.

"Because it's made with love!" Grizelda exclaimed, her eyes twinkling. "And a little bit of magic."

"Professor Eldrune said that Interdimensional Grub is the Guardian's weakness," Corvus said. "Do you know anything about that?"

Grizelda's jovial demeanor faltered for a moment, replaced by a flicker of something akin to… recognition? Or perhaps it was just indigestion. Corvus couldn't quite tell. Goblin expressions were notoriously difficult to decipher, even with a comprehensive guide to Goblin Facial Nuances (Form 44-G, available in triplicate).

"The Guardian, you say?" Grizelda repeated, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. She glanced around the bustling marketplace, as if expecting someone to be eavesdropping. "Well, I've heard whispers, rumors… legends, even. But I never put much stock in them."

"What kind of legends?" Corvus pressed, his senses on high alert. The scent of sizzling grumbleburgers was doing little to calm his nerves.

"They say that the Guardian… it has a weakness for my Interdimensional Grub," Grizelda confessed, her voice barely audible above the din of the marketplace. "They say that it can't resist the taste, the aroma… the sheer culinary perfection of my creation."

"And have you ever seen the Guardian eating your Grub?" Rivet asked, his goggles practically steaming with anticipation.

Grizelda hesitated, then nodded slowly. "I've seen someone… or something… eating my Grub," she said. "But I never knew it was the Guardian. I just thought it was a particularly hungry customer."

"Tell us everything," Corvus urged. "What did it look like? When did it happen? What kind of Grub did it order?"

Grizelda closed her eyes, concentrating. "It was a few weeks ago," she said. "It was late at night, after the marketplace had closed. A figure approached my stall, shrouded in shadows. I couldn't see its face, but I could sense its power, its… ancientness."

"And what did it order?" Corvus asked, his voice barely a whisper.

"It ordered the Special," Grizelda said. "The Interdimensional Grub with extra squirming noodles and a double dose of secret sauce."

"The Special?" Rivet exclaimed. "That's the most expensive item on the menu!"

"The Guardian has good taste," Grizelda said, with a wink. "Anyway, it devoured the Grub in seconds, then vanished into the night. I never saw it again."

Corvus exchanged a look with Rivet and Umbral. This was it. They were on the right track. They just needed to find the figure who had ordered the Special, the Interdimensional Grub with extra squirming noodles and a double dose of secret sauce.

"Grizelda," Corvus said, "I need your help. I need you to keep a record of everyone who orders the Special. I need to know their names, their descriptions, and their contact information."

"That's a lot of paperwork," Grizelda said, sighing. "I'm a cook, not a bureaucrat."

"I'll make it worth your while," Corvus said, pulling out a stack of Department vouchers. "These vouchers are good for free interdimensional travel, discounted goblin insurance, and a lifetime supply of grumbleberries."

Grizelda's eyes widened. "You drive a hard bargain, Mr…?"

"Quill," Corvus said. "Corvus Quill. And I'm serious about this, Grizelda. The fate of Aethel may depend on it."

Grizelda nodded, her face grave. "I'll do it," she said. "I'll keep a record of everyone who orders the Special. But I can't guarantee that it will lead you to the Guardian."

"It's a start," Corvus said. "And that's all we need."

For the next few weeks, Corvus, Rivet, and Umbral spent their days monitoring the Grub Hub, waiting for someone to order the Special. Zinnia, meanwhile, was busy analyzing the customer records, searching for patterns, anomalies, or anything that might lead them to the Guardian.

The wait was agonizing. Every time someone approached the Grub Hub, Corvus's heart would leap into his throat. Every time someone ordered the Special, he would hold his breath, waiting to see if it was the Guardian.

But each time, he was disappointed. The customers were just ordinary Aethelians, goblins, and various other extradimensional beings, all with a craving for Grizelda's delicious Grub.

"This is hopeless," Rivet said, after another fruitless day of surveillance. "We're never going to find the Guardian this way. We're just wasting our time."

"We can't give up now," Corvus said, his voice filled with determination. "We've come too far. We're too close."

"But what if the Guardian never orders the Special again?" Rivet asked. "What if it's moved on to a different dish? What if it's decided to become a vegetarian?"

"We have to trust that it will return," Corvus said. "The ancient texts said that Interdimensional Grub is the Guardian's weakness. It can't resist it forever."

As if on cue, Grizelda emerged from her stall, waving frantically. "Mr. Quill!" she shouted. "I think I've got something!"

Corvus, Rivet, and Umbral rushed towards the Grub Hub, their hearts pounding with anticipation.

"Someone just ordered the Special," Grizelda said, her voice trembling. "And it's someone I've never seen before."

"Describe them," Corvus said, his voice barely a whisper.

"It's a woman," Grizelda said. "Tall, slender, with long, flowing hair. She's wearing a hooded cloak, so I can't see her face. But she has an aura of… power. It's like nothing I've ever felt before."

"Did she say anything?" Rivet asked.

"Just that she was really hungry," Grizelda said. "And that she had heard great things about my Interdimensional Grub."

"Where did she go?" Corvus asked.

"She headed towards the Old Quarter," Grizelda said. "The one near the docks."

"The Old Quarter?" Umbral rumbled. "That's a dangerous place. It's filled with smugglers, thieves, and all sorts of unsavory characters."

"Then we need to go there," Corvus said. "We need to find this woman. She may be the Guardian."

The Old Quarter was a labyrinth of narrow streets, crumbling buildings, and dimly lit alleyways. The air was thick with the stench of fish, salt, and something vaguely unpleasant that Corvus couldn't quite identify.

Corvus, Rivet, and Umbral cautiously made their way through the Old Quarter, searching for the woman in the hooded cloak. They asked the locals if they had seen her, but no one seemed to know anything.

"This is like looking for a needle in a haystack," Rivet said, his goggles fogging up with frustration. "There are hundreds of people in this place. How are we ever going to find her?"

"We have to keep looking," Corvus said. "The Guardian is out there. We just need to find her before it's too late."

As they were walking down a particularly dark and narrow alleyway, they heard a sound. A soft, melodic humming, coming from a nearby building.

"Did you hear that?" Corvus asked.

"I did," Umbral rumbled. "It sounds like… magic."

Corvus, Rivet, and Umbral cautiously approached the building, their senses on high alert. They peered through a crack in the door and saw a woman inside.

She was tall, slender, with long, flowing hair. She was wearing a hooded cloak, and her face was hidden in shadow. She was standing in front of a table, on which were scattered various magical artifacts, potions, and ingredients. She was humming softly, her hands moving gracefully over the artifacts.

"That's her," Corvus whispered. "That's the woman from the Grub Hub."

He took a deep breath and pushed open the door, stepping into the building.

The woman turned around, her eyes widening in surprise. "Who are you?" she asked, her voice soft and melodious. "And what do you want?"

Corvus stepped forward, his heart pounding in his chest. "We know who you are," he said. "We know that you're the Guardian."

The woman stared at Corvus, her eyes filled with a mixture of surprise and… amusement?

"The Guardian?" she said, her lips curling into a smile. "You think I'm the Guardian? That's absurd."

She paused, then added with a wink, "Although, I must admit, that Interdimensional Grub was delicious."