You Can Wait

He drained the last of the amber liquid before pouring more. Though the man preferred the taste of ale, whiskey was easier to keep tucked away for times of need.

It was convenient.

Took up less space.

And was quicker to lower inhibitions.

“There’s a lot of mundane tasks in The Guard, all of which will keep you trapped there for every day of those fifteen years. But there’s jobs you can do that will reduce your time, the more unsavory ones that no one else wants to do. Head hunting will be your best option. It can be done quickly, without much fuss. They don’t even have to know it’s happening. You’ll be good at it. You’re smart, good at tracking. You just find them, take their heads, and bring them back.” Raz looked at the boy who sat across from him at the kitchen table before glancing at the girl curled in his lap, asleep, completely spent from whatever she had demolished outside. He had heard the ongoing destruction, but chose to ignore it. The man could only handle one mess at a time. “If you can chase that girl down then you can easily chase down any Rogue One.”

Ren nodded, taking in his uncle’s advice. “What did you do in The Guard?”

“Wing Clipper.” He took a drink. “You need to avoid that. They’re much easier to find but the process of shredding their wings takes hours, and their screams will never leave you. It’ll reduce your time quicker but not by much. Not nearly enough to justify the risk. I’m not saying you can’t do it, but you’ll be playing with fire each time you do, and you’ll have no one but yourself if things get out of control. They’re betting on that. That sooner or later you either get killed on whatever bullshit mission they drum up for you, or by a Rogue One, or go rogue yourself. That way they have reason to kill you. Don’t give them the opportunity. Keep your head down, do what you have to do, and get out.”

“What’s the difference? Why are some killed while others have their wings taken?”

“They take the head of those who have done things like killed or raped or sometimes stole depending on what was stolen. Stealing an apple or book is a lot different than taking someone. It angers God to have that which is his taken, so he takes back the life that he gave. They take the wings of those who have walked away from God and His Kingdom. He can forgive most things, but there are certain things he won’t. Being rejected is one. The stripping of the wings is the worst thing that could happen to an angel.”

The boy raised a brow, a sort of sick amusement on his face. “Seems like losing your wings is the better deal. At least you can still live. Do what you want. If you’re dead, it’s over. There’s nothing else.”

Raz glanced away, observing the liquid in his glass. “Trust me, death is the kinder option.” He downed the rest and filled it again, taking another drink. “It’s like having everything ripped from you. Your hopes, your dreams, your soul. It’s a constant reminder that you betrayed God, the one who loves you most. You pray for death, but you’re too scared to do it yourself because you know that’s what angers Him the most, and you’re still praying that He will forgive you. He can forgive you harming someone else, understand the reasons and feelings behind it. And there’s always the chance that he’ll forgive you for turning your back on Him, as He is merciful. But you can’t take your own life. You can’t destroy what God gave you.”

“I’m sorry,” the young angel said softly, wallowing in his shame. His uncle had been stripped of his wings, all for his sake, and he was making light of it. What a cruel thing to do to the one he owed his life to.

“Don’t be, it was my choice. But that’s how it works in The Kingdom. It’s best to do what God wants.”

Ren chewed his tongue, measuring his confession, as his arms adjusted Sakura against him. “What if I don’t care what God wants? What if I only care about what I want?”

The man looked back up at the boy, not surprised in the least. “Of course you do. That’s what makes you evil in their eyes. Whether they betray Him or not, all angels still fear God. Except the Fallen Ones. They want what they want, and they’ll do any means necessary to get it. They live for themselves, not for Him. They have no fear of God which makes everyone fear them.”

The girl stirred, her face nuzzling further against the young angel’s chest as the older one frowned at her. She was already so difficult to deal with, impossible if not for Ren. Raz was going to have to find some way to keep the demon’s devastation to a minimum until the boy returned.

How he would do that, he hadn’t the slightest idea.

“Has she tried to convince you to stay yet?”

“No.” Ren peered down at her hopelessly. “Not yet. But I know it’s coming.”

Raz hated doing this to his nephew but there was no other choice. “I guarantee she’s going to try to talk you into running off into those mountains. You have to tell her no and mean it. If you don’t, she’ll be as good as dead. I’m sure you two will run for a while, but sooner or later it’ll catch up to you, as it always does. And when it does, they will show her no mercy. No one's going to miss some violent, little, fox girl far from her den who’s harboring not just a traitor, but a Fallen One. She will suffer, and they’ll use her to make you suffer as well.”

Blue eyes tilted up, promising. “I’ll tell her no.”

“And once you’re gone you stay gone,” the man insisted, no room for arguing. “You might think you’ll be able to drop in real quick, in and out, but you won’t. You won’t want to leave, and she won’t let you. You’ll be right up in those mountains, and then you’ll both be dead.”

The boy nodded, not looking at the man. He had planned on doing just that when he could manage to sneak away but hearing it out loud made him realize how it couldn’t be an option, and it just tore him down more.

“Don’t do that,” Raz warned. “Don’t feel sorry for yourself. No one else will, and self-pity will only make you weak.” He finished the rest of the whiskey and poured a healthy shot’s worth before pushing it across the table. “Here, get over yourself and drink.” There was only a moment of hesitation before the boy grabbed the glass and downed its contents, his eyes going wide as he attempted to muffle his coughs. Raz took the glass back, filling it for himself. “Good, huh?”

Ren’s face twisted in disgust, and he caught his breath. “Fuck no! It tastes like shit.”

“It’ll make you feel like shit if you drink enough of it, so don’t try it again until you’re free.” The man watched him uncomfortably re-situate himself and the girl, clearly taking the lesson the heart. “Now, when you kill a devil, you make sure to ensure your absolute freedom and that of your offspring. Don’t give them the opportunity to do to them what they’re trying to do to you. They normally don’t acknowledge the half-blood ones since they’re born without wings, but they also didn’t acknowledge you and look where we’re at now.”

Ren was surprised. As large as the wings that protruded from his back were, he assumed it was a given that they would be passed on to his children. “The ones who are half angel don’t have wings?”

Raz shook his head. “No. The children still inherit a lot of the angel traits but not the wings. At least, not that I’ve ever seen or heard of. Yours will look like her. Little foxes. They’ll be real pretty little things. Probably mean and vicious as hell. Just like their mother.”

There was no point in denying it or pretending it wasn’t the truth. The man knew it would happen sooner or later, and he had always hoped for later. He had seen a few girls in the village over the years who came with child long before they were ready, when they themselves were really only children. The two were at the age that no matter how he may try to stop it, if they had the will then they would find the way. However, The Guard had stepped in to alleviate that worry, and if there was a silver lining in any of this, it would probably be that.

The boy turned away, embarrassed, but quickly decided against it and faced the man with resolved intent in his stare. “When I get back, I’m going to make her my bride.”

“I don’t know why you’re looking at me like that for.” He raised his glass to his lips and chuckled lightly; the second time Ren had heard the sound in his life. “You’re gonna have to stop being so scared of that girl and actually ask her and not just tell me about it. This ain’t the den, boy. You can’t just go up to the alpha making demands for a woman. Only she gets a say.”

“I know. I will ask her, and she’ll say yes.”

That had been obvious to Raz from the beginning. Everything the girl did was an attempt to garner attention from the young angel. It was part of the reason he allowed her to stay rather than trying to find her another home. Ren had always been more withdrawn, lost in the swirling of the unknown abyss of his mind. Only when she came around did that change, was the boy able to escape it. And he saw it in her, too. She had someone to walk beside rather than run from. Who was he to take that from either of them?

“I’m sure she will.” The man finished off the glass and poured another, feeling the warmth of the whiskey radiate through his blood. “You know, there’s different ceremonies for different beings. For fox demons, the man will grace his bride with a crown of flowers. Give her a flower of his choosing before he takes hers. It’s pretty fucked up considering the women have no choice in their mates. They’re raised to be subservient to the men. To give unto them without complaint, whether or not they want to.”

A look of horror settled across Ren’s features as he held the girl tighter. “That’s what would have happened to Sakura if she had stayed? A man would have force himself on her?”

That was the funniest thing that Raz had ever heard, and he chuckled again, a louder and deeper rumble from his chest. “Not a fucking chance. I doubt there would ever be a man in the den foolish enough to take her as his mate, and if there was, that girl would rip it off and beat him to death with it before he had the chance. I have no doubt that she’d have already taken alpha and be ruling with an iron fist had she never run. There’s something wrong with that girl. She’s not natural. She’s a fucking monster. And only a monster can handle another monster. You understand?”

The boy nodded, knowing all too well. “I do.”

“I’m sure you do. Fox demons are the only ones who still continue that tradition, but angels aren’t all that much better. Though most are free to wed who they want, there are still a lot of arranged marriages…” The man went quiet, watching the boy with glassy eyes and took another drink. “But for angels, they mark their One. They allow the other to pluck a feather and then they kiss it onto their right shoulder so they each have a piece of each other. It binds them together, and they can never choose another, even after one dies. To break the bond is a sin.”

“What’s so special about the right shoulder?” the boy asked. “Why not the left?”

Raz tapped his sternum. “Your heart is located slightly to the left. So, the idea is you keep your heart on the left and theirs on the right, and they do the same.”

Ren sat in silence, considering his options.

The man didn’t like that.

Not at all.

“Don’t even think about it,” he growled. “If I wind up having to care for not only Sakura but your child as well, then not even the entirety of The Guard and heavens will be able to save you from me.”

The boy turned away, and this time, he didn’t turn back as his cheeks went flush, and his breath caught in his throat. He didn’t need to confirm nor deny the allegations. He was a sixteen-year-old boy, that fact alone spoke for itself, and it told the man that the boy knew that he had been caught before any plan could be formed in his constantly scheming mind.

Raz narrowed his eyes, sipping at the whiskey, the taste a burning bitter. “Don’t be a fucking idiot. You can keep it to yourself until you get back. That girl isn’t going anywhere. She’ll wait for you, so you can wait for her.”