Chapter 4: Rich, Stressed, and Now I Have a Wolfgirl

Dragging a half-drenched wolf girl across the marble floors of my very luxurious apartment wasn't exactly how I imagined my evening.

Lunaria trotted along beside me, leaving a soggy trail behind, her silver hair dripping onto the floor, her wolf tail wagging like she thought this was a fun field trip.

It wasn’t.

"You're lucky I don't charge extra for water damage," I muttered.

She just beamed at me, oblivious.

When we finally reached my living room, a space so big it could probably host a wedding, I shoved her onto the velvet couch and crossed my arms.

Before I could even figure out what to do next, the heavy doors slammed open with a loud BANG.

"Little Mistress!" Chester barked, rushing in first, a gleaming silver dagger already drawn from... somewhere.

Zach and Randy stormed in right behind him, both wielding tasers and looking like they were ready to reenact an action movie.

"Are you alright?! We heard a splash followed by suspicious activity!" Zach shouted, scanning the room like he expected ninjas to pop out of the furniture.

"I brought the pepper spray," Randy added, waving it dangerously close to my face.

I leaned back slightly. "I’m fine. Put the weapons away."

Chester’s eyes darted to Lunaria, who was waving at them enthusiastically from the couch, soaked and smiling like she'd just won a game show.

There was a long, loaded pause.

"...Did the wolf girl attack you?" Chester asked seriously.

"No," I said flatly. "She fell into the pool. Somehow. Don't ask."

They all stared at Lunaria again.

She gave a little peace sign.

"...Is that... a tail?" Zach finally whispered, voice cracking.

"And ears," Randy added, inching behind Chester like Lunaria might suddenly bite him.

"Are we sure she's not some kind of mutant?" Zach hissed.

"I vote we call animal control," Randy said, already pulling out his phone.

"Put the phone down before you embarrass yourself," I said dryly.

"But Misstress—!" Zach squeaked.

"Wolf girl. Real. Not a costume. Deal with it." I said, gesturing vaguely at Lunaria, who was now busy squeezing water out of her hair like this was totally normal.

Zach and Randy exchanged horrified glances, like I'd just told them the coffee machine could talk.

Meanwhile, Chester simply straightened his jacket, entirely unbothered.

In fact... he looked almost bored.

"You seem awfully calm about this," I said, narrowing my eyes at him.

Chester smiled politely, but there was something a little too sharp about it. "I've... seen stranger things in my time, Little Mistress."

Cryptic. As usual.

I filed that away for later.

For now, I had bigger problems to deal with.

Like the puddle forming around Lunaria’s feet.

And the fact that she is now clinging to me like a wet, overexcited puppy.

"Please let me stay!" she begged, clutching the hem of my shirt with both hands. "I don’t have anywhere to go!"

I blinked down at her. "...You’re homeless?"

She nodded earnestly, her ears drooping a little. "I got kicked out... Well, more like chased out... Anyway, I can't go back."

Of course she couldn’t. Because why not.
I sighed, feeling the beginnings of a migraine forming behind my eyes.

This was what I got for thinking the world was boring.
Now the universe heard and threw chaos directly into my living room. Great. Super.

I exhaled slowly, feeling my last few brain cells flickering out.

"Fine," I muttered. "You can stay. As a... tenant, I guess."

Lunaria's ears perked up. She tilted her head. "What's a tenant?"

Before I could even answer, Chester smoothly stepped in like he’d been waiting for this moment.

"In your case, perhaps we should classify you as a 'watchdog,'" he suggested, adjusting his glasses. "It would be appropriate for someone of your... talents."

Lunaria's eyes sparkled. "Ooh! That sounds cool! What's a watchdog?"

"You... watch," Chester said with a perfectly straight face. "And you... guard."

Lunaria nodded solemnly, tail wagging so hard it was practically a weapon. "I can totally do that! Watching and guarding are my specialties!"

Zach muttered something like "Is this really happening?" under his breath, but I ignored him.

I rubbed my temples. "Chester, do whatever screening thing you need to do. Just... hurry before my soul leaves my body."

Chester, ever the professional, pulled a clipboard out of nowhere like a magician.

"In that case," he said briskly, "we shall proceed with formal evaluation."

Lunaria bounced a little on the couch, sending more droplets flying. "Yay! I love quizzes!"

"...It's not a quiz," Chester corrected with the patience of a saint. "It is a formal evaluation."

"It sounds like a quiz," she chirped.

I slumped deeper into my chair, already regretting every decision that led me to this exact moment.

Chester cleared his throat, straightening the clipboard like he was about to conduct a top-secret government interview.

"First question," he said solemnly. "What are your strengths?"

Lunaria puffed up her chest proudly. "I'm good at digging holes!"

Chester paused. His pen hovered over the paper.
"...Noted," he said, somehow without blinking.

I covered my mouth to hide a snort.

Chester continued, undeterred. "What are your weaknesses?"

"Umm..." Lunaria tapped her chin, thinking deeply. "I can't resist chasing things that run away. Especially squeaky ones."

"Also noted," Chester said gravely, scribbling something down.

Zach whispered loudly to Randy, "So basically a very energetic golden retriever."

"I heard that!" Lunaria said brightly, wagging her tail even harder.

Chester flipped to the next page on his clipboard.

"Any previous work experience?"

"I once chased a squirrel for three days straight," Lunaria answered immediately, as if this was a perfectly normal résumé bullet point. "It was a very smart squirrel."

I buried my face in my hands.

Chester didn't even flinch. "And the outcome?"

"...It disappeared into a vending machine," she admitted sadly.

"Resilient opponent. Understood." Chester scribbled even more notes.

At this point, I was 80% sure Chester wasn’t even pretending to be professional anymore. He was just running with the madness at full speed.

"Next," Chester said, voice unwavering, "how would you react to an intruder?"

Lunaria’s ears perked up. "Bark at them!"

Silence.

"...Bark?" I repeated, lifting my head.

She nodded enthusiastically. "Really loudly! Scare them off!"

Zach coughed into his hand, suspiciously sounding like a laugh. Even Randy had to turn around to hide his shaking shoulders.

I just stared at Chester like: Surely you see the problem here.

But Chester, bless him, only pushed his glasses up higher.

"Effective deterrence tactic," he said, making a serious note.

At this point, I was starting to question who was crazier: the werewolf girl or the butler encouraging her.

After what felt like a hundred more equally painful questions ("Can you handle weapons?" "Only sticks." "Any allergic reactions?" "Stupid squirrels."), Chester finally lowered the clipboard.

"Evaluation complete," he announced.

"And...?" I asked warily.

Chester tapped the clipboard thoughtfully. "I have come to a conclusion."

He turned to Lunaria with a solemn nod.

"In addition to being a tenant, it would be highly beneficial for you to act as a personal bodyguard for the Little Mistress."

Lunaria gasped. "A bodyguard?! Like in movies?!"

"Yes," Chester said gravely. "You would accompany her to school. Protect her from harm. Remain vigilant."

Lunaria vibrated with excitement, looking like she might actually explode.

I immediately waved my hands. "Wait, wait, wait. NO. Absolutely not. I don't need a bodyguard at school!"

Chester adjusted his gloves calmly. "Of course. However, if you bring Lunaria with you... Zach and Randy will not have to follow you to school anymore."

I froze.

I slowly turned to look at Zach and Randy, who were both grinning in that we totally would have stalked you through the hallways kind of way.

"You wouldn’t..." I said in horror.

Zach winked. "We already bought the trench coats."

I died a little inside.

Chester gave a small, polite cough into his hand. "It is, of course, your decision, Little Mistress."

It was a trap. A perfectly crafted, inescapable trap.

Either I brought the disaster wolf to school, or I endured two fully grown men lurking behind vending machines and pretending to read high school math textbooks.

I stared at Lunaria.

She was giving me the biggest, sparkliest puppy eyes I had ever seen.

"...Fine," I muttered, defeated. "You can come."

Lunaria squealed and tackled me in a wet hug.

I sighed into her damp hair.

This was my life now.