Chapter 3 Headless Knight: Epic Buff

And so, Luenk gained an "unlikely friend"—a girl who looked thirteen or fourteen, but whose actual mental age was that of a woman in her thirties (though Luenk felt Banana's mental age matched her appearance; those twenty years lived in the New Century Space counted for nothing).

After that, they would meet up every day after work to chat. Honestly, Luenk's mind was currently consumed with getting his head back, but having someone to talk to occasionally wasn't bad. It was just that Banana talked a lot, and she always found new ways to mock him for not having a head, which often escalated into a "Headless Knight vs. Vampire Princess" showdown in the Oracle of Raine World's duel arena. Recently, Luenk had actually managed to win a round or two—though mostly by accidentally triggering a series of low-probability passive healing skills when he was at critical health, it was still enough to greatly boost his spirits.

On weekends, he would also meet up with his good, sarcastic friend Yosuke. Later, he brought Banana along. When Yosuke first saw her, he exclaimed dramatically, "Luenk, you bastard, you actually achieved my lifelong dream—finding a loli of legal age!"

It made Luenk want to beat him up.

Afterward, the three of them often played board games or cards together. Yosuke basically didn't work; he spent every day hanging out with various friends, always available at a moment's notice.

Soon, Halloween arrived. Time here was synchronized with the real world outside. Presumably, the outside world... was also celebrating Halloween in the virtual world. Honestly, who still lived properly in the real world nowadays? Everyone pursued the pleasures of virtual space as much as possible; living was pretty much the same as being dead.

"Waaah—don't eat me! Help!" That was Yosuke's scream. More than half of his body had been sucked into a grotesque painting—a "Woman in the Rain" with a gaping maw, seemingly "savoring" him.

"Wahaha! The Pumpkin Queen has arrived!" This was Banana. She was wearing a pumpkin-themed ball gown studded with pink diamonds, adorned with various trinkets like mini-rockets, black flags, and black-and-white striped stockings—a truly gothic and whimsical pumpkin person.

"..." This was Luenk. He had lost the last card game, and the stake was that the winner would decide his next costume. So now, his appearance was: a headless person with a giant ":)" smiley face balloon tied to his neck.

The balloon swayed with the wind, and the smiley face spun around with it.

"Hahahaha! Luenk, this look is practically tailor-made for you!" Pumpkin Queen Banana burst out laughing.

"Boohoohoo, I'm Luenk the Headless Knight. Want to buy a balloon? Ten dollars apiece, hahaha!" Yosuke, now lying on the ground, also started laughing.

"Yosuke, my good friend, don't let me find an opportunity, or I'll use your head as a balloon," Luenk said with a sinister smile. As for why he only said this to Yosuke, it was because Banana often joked about his head, and he had become immune to Banana's teasing.

And in this ancient town, where all sorts of bizarre giant, shapeless monsters floated in the air, filled with eerie winds, virtual goblins shrieked past from time to time, and countless ghastly green will-o'-the-wisps flickered, the grand "Post-Halloween" carnival officially began.

"Might as well have everyone go back to the real world for Easter," Luenk grumbled.

And as he wandered around for a while, amazed by many strange sights, such as a pulsating flesh ball formed by a dozen virtual avatars, and sliced human tissues twitching in glass jars—all quite creative.

After that, their weekend "Bad Joke Parties" became a regular event. Each weekend, they would each pick out a few jokes and share them with each other.

"Listen to this," Banana began, clearing her throat theatrically. "After a math test, the teacher was furious with the class's scores. She threw the papers down and yelled, 'Even if you didn't bring your books or pens, as long as you brought your brains, you wouldn't have scored this low! Oh, Luenk, you're an exception.'"

Yosuke roared with laughter, while Luenk let out a hiss of exasperation from his neck cavity.

"My turn," Yosuke said, wiping tears of laughter from his eyes. "A man with no hands yells, 'I'm dying, help!' The doctor takes him to the infirmary and reattaches his hands. Another man with no lower body yells, 'I'm dying, help!' The doctor takes him to the emergency room and reconstructs his body. Then, a man with no head yells, 'I'm dying, help!' The doctor says, 'Luenk, stop messing around.'"

This time, even Banana was doubled over with laughter, leaving Luenk as the sole protester.

"Enough, you guys just love making fun of me!" Luenk stomped his foot angrily, which only made the other two laugh harder. But Luenk didn't leave. He was used to being teased by now, but he always pretended to be angry, which in turn made the other two even more relentless. Time passed quickly in this comfortable, if somewhat ridiculous, routine. Luenk himself barely noticed that almost three years had gone by. His Boss title in "Oracle of Raine World" had also been upgraded from the original "Headless Cinder Knight" to the more intimidating "Inferno Headless Knight King," and his appearance fee had increased to five thousand dollars per session. So Luenk was still 98 years away from buying back his head. After all, every party required beer and snacks, and now Luenk was also buying things to improve his quality of life, such as a fountain pool and AI maids and butlers.

"[The next player team is arriving, get ready.]" The cold system prompt interrupted his thoughts. Luenk flexed his entire body, and just as he was about to depart, he saw a message from Yosuke: "I'm dying..."

"Seriously, bothering me during my work hours," Luenk muttered, glancing at the teleportation countdown, and pressed "ignore" without a second thought, then continued to play the Headless Knight.

"What? Yosuke's dead?!"

Luenk's question echoed from his empty neck, his voice distorted by the shock, causing his data stream to become unstable.

"Yes, sir. We deeply regret this unfortunate incident." The AI customer service representative maintained a standard smile, though their tone was programmed with a hint of apology and sadness. "Your friend, Mr. Yosuke Akamine's personality data storage server was unfortunately attacked by the terrorist extremist organization, 'Human Soul Liberation Movement.' According to the World Federation's laws, personality data is not allowed to be backed up. Therefore, when Mr. Yosuke Akamine's storage unit was destroyed by fire, his consciousness also vanished. However, he did leave a will, hoping to transfer his head's image data to you, free of charge."

Luenk stared at Yosuke's head, now contained in a transparent blue gift box, stunned. After a while, Banana also sent a message, saying many things, but Luenk only remembered one sentence: "So people can still die in the afterlife? Is this even an afterlife anymore?"

And after that, there was a collective funeral. Because many people, or rather, many sets of data, had been erased, a grand parade-like funeral was held. Many people wore funeral attire from different cultures and dressed as various cultural depictions of death, walking down the street. It was a strange parade, in this afterlife.

Luenk held Yosuke's head, still in its box. He was treated as one of the "Grim Reapers" participating in the parade.

"You're even unluckier than me," Luenk said with a smile, looking at Yosuke, who was now just a head with empty eyes. He had an idea.

"Hahahaha, mortals, how dare you challenge me? Interesting, then I shall reward you with despair!"

"What? It's coming!" The team, equipped with various god-tier items, began to shout excitedly and nervously. They knew that after using all sorts of expensive materials, they had finally successfully opened this instance—the Inferno God-King Headless Supreme and His Death's Head Servant! A headless lord clad in red, flaming armor, floated amidst erupting lava, beside him floated a head emitting multicolored flames, as they attacked.

"[Good brother, let's be humiliated together and buy back my head.]" Luenk, or rather, the Inferno God-King Headless Supreme, looked at everything before him. He was still in this cyber world, searching for his own head. (The End)