My First... Moral Turn

I stare at the remaining clothes scattered across the floor where I dropped them. My head feels fuzzy, but I wouldn't call it painful. The events of yesterday keep playing in my mind, what happened just doesn't feel right. I don't feel like Doctor Trev had much of any interest in checking on my physical health, he really only seemed interested in getting those photos of me. I wonder if the others experienced the same thing?

I enter my closet to grab new underwear, slipping them on and putting on the rest of my clothes from yesterday. Did Doctor Trev feed me some sort of drug? I can't imagine why he would want to do that. I pick up my pill bottle and drop a small pill into my palm. I place it on my tongue trying to replicate the feeling I had yesterday, my regular pill feels smaller than what was on my tongue yesterday. I move the pill around with my fingers trying to place it in different ways to see if any other orientation would make it feel larger, but no luck. As I'm moving it around I notice I'm not getting any odd taste. Usually when you take too long to swallow a pill you start to feel that weird flavor of the drug, yet I wasn't tasting anything at all. I pulled the pill out of my mouth and examined it between my fingers. It looked right to me, the right blueish color, the right size. Nothing looks wrong, and yet I feel this creeping feeling that something is wrong here. My heart rate picks up as silly thoughts crosses my mind, what if they replaced my pills with placebos?

If you were planning to abandon the Marrowville project and turn this into a Spawn infested area, wouldn't you want to get a head start on your girls becoming Spawn? Surely they wouldn't make a move already, right? I just put up with that medical checkup, I'm being a good Magical Girl, are they really still planning to abandon us?

My breathing gets deeper as I open the drawer on my vanity and pull out my colored pencils. I opened the box and let a single pill drop from inside, surely they couldn't have expected me to have a secret stash of my pills. I sit the pill down on my desk, then grab a new pill from the bottle in case the one from my mouth was only off due to being in my mouth. Side by side it was impossible not to notice there was clearly something different here. The blue color was far more faded on the bottle pill, and the size was slightly off, being less fat than the secret stash pill. There you have it, this is real, they're moving forward with abandoning us...

I swallow the real pill, I'll hold off any negative effects from being off the meds for as long as I can. I only placed a handful in my pencil box, maybe enough pills for thirteen days. If they were planning for us to become Spawn then surely they would begin seeing changes far before these pills run out. But what about the others? Did they save any secret pills? I never got the chance to tell Tikki about it! If I need to divide my stash by three suddenly now we are only good for four days, I'll be in real trouble. Clarice believed me though, hopefully she hid some pills of her own and we can pool them to share with Tikki. I'm gonna need more pills, the question is where can I get some? D'Claire-na, she would know.

She had told me before that she stays alive stealing pills when she isn't eating Spawn directly. If I really am going to believe her now then I might as well listen to everything she has to say. I need to visit her again, hopefully she'll let me. Should I try to bring Clarice and Tikki along? All of the floors Magical Girls disappearing all at once might be noticeable. Wait, the morning meeting! Shoot, I got so distracted by the pills I forgot there is still a morning meeting.

I grab my bag and run out of my room and book it down the hall to the elevator. It takes me right down to the meeting floor, I wonder if D'Claire-na can see me right now.

Everyone else is already here, looks like I'm the last one here. Tikki gives me a warm smile, completely unaware of what is going on to be worried about. I take my seat and Miss Gretchen begins the meeting. "Good morning ladies. Today's agenda is pretty short, no grand missions today." She actually had something written she was reading off of today. "Yesterday you all completed your physicals with Doctor Trev, you all were found to be healthy and in well enough condition to continue on fighting. Great work all of you."

How would Doctor Trev know how healthy I am or not, guy never even asked how I was. Gretchen puts down her piece of paper with an audible sigh. "That's all. Please enjoy a day of rest after all of yesterday's testing." Testing? Yeah right, the only thing I was tested on was my loyalty and ability to follow demeaning instructions. Gretchen just left without another word, she seemed preoccupied with something. Not that it matters to me.

Before leaving I stop Tikki and Clarice. "HOW DID YOUR EXAMS GO YESTERDAY?"

"Not bad I'd say." Clarice shrugged. "I was able to lift the weights as well as the jumping section without any issues." My eyes widened before I caught myself and returned to a natural expression.

Tikki nodded in agreement. "Doctor Trev was kind enough to allow me to skip the pull up section this time due to my lack of an arm. I told him I could do some one handed but he said he preferred I didn't."

Clarice made a sour expression, "He let you skip it?? He made me do it even though King makes me as good as one handed!"

King scoffed, "If anything we were cheating by getting to let me use my entire upper body while everyone else used hands."

"No way! It was totally a handicap!" Clarice growled at him.

King leaned towards her. "You didn't feel that way when I was helping you ace the memory section."

"Whatever!" Clarice rolled her eyes. "I'll never need to be able to memorize forty four cards and their locations."

I stand there listening to them discussing all these different parts of their tests and I feel like this is all some sort of elaborate prank. I'm supposed to believe Doctor Trev gave them real physical exams with all these different parts, and then when it came to my turn he just had me strip and then drugged me!? This is ridiculous.

Tikki touched my arm, bringing me out of my thoughts. "How was it for you? I know all these tests can be tiring the first time around."

I wanted to tell them what he had me do, but suddenly my chest felt so tight. Was I embarrassed? I hadn't done anything wrong. He was the one who did stuff I'm sure he wasn't supposed to do. And yet when I wrote my response it read, "IT WENT OKAY. VERY TIRING."

Tikki gave me a warm smile, "Well now you can look forward to next time when you can beat your old scores!"

I never want to ever be in a room with that man again. That's the one good thing about being abandoned, I won't need to worry about having to see certain MGI employees again.

We all made our way towards the elevators when I remembered I wanted to see D'Claire-na, I thought about if I should invite Clarice to join me. Tikki at this point had been left in the dark so much that I'd have to catch her up way too much. I'll fill her in another time, but right now wasn't the time. I paused my steps stopping, the others taking note and stopping as well facing me to see what was up. I quickly wrote on my board, "HEY CAN I TALK TO YOU FOR A MINUTE CLARICE?"

She nodded, "Sure, what's up?"

I looked over at Tikki who was still standing there listening. I felt bad as I wrote "ITS SORTA PRIVATE CAN YOU COME WITH ME?" Tikki face dropped ever slightly, she was clearly disappointed to be left out. But she didn't say anything, she just said a parting goodbye and entered the elevator. Once we were alone I held up "DID YOUR MORNING PILL SEEM DIFFERENT?"

She raised an eyebrow below her thick bangs. "I don't think so, why?"

"THEY REPLACED MINE. I CAN SEE THE DIFFERENCE WHEN I PLACE AN OLD AND NEW BESIDE ONE ANOTHER. IT IS STARTING."

She looked over at King, "Did you notice anything?" He just shrugged, "I never pay attention to your morning routine."

"DID YOU HIDE ANY PILLS LIKE I TOLD YOU TO?" I asked, hoping, praying she did.

King swayed cheerfully, "Have no fear, we did hide some in a DVD case. We trust you more than enough to entertain you by doing something that simple."

I clasp my hands around one of King's and Clarice's free hands, jumping with joy. That made both of them laugh at me for my sudden excited outburst. Once it was out of my system I returned to my board and conveying my plan. "I BELIEVE OUR NEXT BEST MOVE IS TO SPEAK WITH DECLAIRENA. SHE MAY HOLD MORE USEFUL INFO!"

"I agree. I have been wanting to meet this girl myself." King nodded with his tiny arms crossed. "It can't hurt!" Clarice added.

"THEN FOLLOW ME!" I threw my free hand into the air. I marched over to the elevator, Clarice following behind, and then I came to a stop. How was I gonna get D'Claire-na to open the door for me this time. She probably doesn't have that phone anymore, and I don't exactly have anything to bribe her with. I kicked the elevator door, frightening Clarice enough to make her jump. "Is a- Is that part of how to get to her?" Clarice asked, taking a step back.

"I DON'T KNOW. BUT IT MIGHT HELP!"

King and Clarice tilted their heads staring at me. I must look kinda crazy right now. Please D'Claire-na, just open the door! I get on my knees and pray for her to open the door, Clarice grabs my shoulder and tries to get me off the floor. I'm fighting to stay on the ground when the door to the elevator opens again. I look up expecting either Gretchen or Tikki having come back for some reason, but instead the elevator is completely empty. BINGO. I get off the floor and brush myself off, then I walk into the elevator and motion for Clarice to follow me. She looks around the inside of the elevator as if there was anyway for someone to be hiding inside, once she and King are satisfied they join me inside.

The elevator begins to lower deeper below the ground, Clarice and King make a peep of surprise as we begin to feel ourselves lowering. "Guess she really wasn't making up the secret room!" King chuckled. I side eye him, questioning just how much of a joke that was.

The elevator comes to a stop and the doors open revealing the darkness of D’Claire-na’s floor. I am the first to take a step out from the elevator, Clarice seems hesitant to wander blindly down the black hallway.

“THERE IS LIGHT AROUND THE CORNER. TRUST ME.” I write, holding my board below the dim light of the elevator.

She follows me forward, holding onto the back of one of my jumper skirt straps. I feel for the first wall at the end of the hallway, then turn and lead us into the light of the room where our destination is waiting.

As we walk out from the darkness she calls out to us, “So I get to see you again so soon!” She leans to the side dragging her chains, “And you brought a friend! Oh, two of them!” She gave King a smile.

“So this is D’Claire-na?” Clarice asked me. I nodded and brought her over to D’Claire-na.

“Don’t get too close, remember the chain curse! Hehe!” She teased. Although it sounded like a joke I admit it was also very much so a valid threat.

“What’s the rules for this curse? Just so I know what not to do.” Clarice asked. I began to write out my answer but D’claire-na responded herself. “If you touch these chains you’ll get chained too. So no taking pity on me and trying to help me. That’s all!”

I nodded to Clarice confirming this was the truth. Although my source was D’Claire-na so really it’s just true as far as I know. I began writing out my first question for D’Claire-na, the conversation continued as I wrote.

“So you must be Pulsar then.” She flicked her arm and its chain towards Clarice. “I am happy we have finally gotten the chance to become acquainted.”

“That is King Pulsar to you.” King corrected her.

She bowed an apology. “Of course King, I forgot myself in the excitement of your presence.”

“Don’t let it happen again. My servant and I would have no problem wiping your rudeness off this planet.” He threatened uncharacteristically.

I finished my message, “OUR PILLS HAVE BEEN REPLACED. YOU WERE RIGHT. WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT GETTING MORE?” My message was completely ignored by all of them as they continued their conversation.

D’Claire-na grinned, “Oh you could wipe a lot off this planet, I know!” She leaned her head to side leaning on her held out arm. “Any thoughts about swapping servants any time soon?”

Clarice took a step back at her words. “He has no need for anyone but me.” She bit her lip.

King pet her head with his tiny hand, “That’s correct. You can’t hope to compare to my Clarice. She was as good as made for me after all. The perfect servant.”

She pulled back at his last sentence, eyeing him judgmentally, then smiled and laughed.

D’Claire-na straightened her head again, sighing. “Yeah I’m aware of that as well. Just keep me in mind if you ever find yourself without her again.” She finally noticed my board. “Oh! Sorry Sophia! Let’s see what we got here.”

She read my sign over. “Huh. I told you they were most likely going to begin abandoning the project. Hope you stockpiled a decent amount of pills because it might be a while before you can get more!” She chuckled.

Between Clarice and I we probably only had two or three handfuls to split between us plus some for Tikki. This might not bode well for us if we don’t think of something. I began writing again but stopped as D’Claire-na began to speak.

“At this rate you probably don’t have much time till the staff leave and you all become targets for other Magical Girl groups.”

Clairce and King looked at one another, then Clarice turned to her with a sceptical look. “Are you really confident in that assertion? Even without our meds we wouldn’t be changing that quickly? How would they explain us not being Spawn yet? Any Magical Girl who showed up at best could only be told they were looking at Fallen Magical Girls.”

“Exactly!” D’Claire-na snapped, her chains rustling. “They’ll tell whoever they send that you all are Fallen Magical Girls. Without your pills even a day or two off them can make you more easily agitated or quick to act. They’ll use that against you to convince your hunters.” She turned her head again, sprouting a large grin, “And the cherry on top will be when they say you ate Marcia!”

“HUH!?” was the common response among the three of us. I stomped my foot making angry hand motions at her while she told us to quiet down and hear her out. “Look, Marcia is now well known to be missing in action. She’s a rising star among you guys, and you all were jealous of her! So much so you ate her to try and gain more strength for yourself!”

Clarice made a scowl. “Why would we ever do that? Tikki especially is a trust figure who’s been around far long enough to know you can’t gain power from eating other Magical Girls.”

“Pop quiz!” D’Claire-na shouted excitedly. “How can you tell a Fallen Magical Girl apart from a regular one?”

“THEY LOOK MORE SPAWN LIKE?” I wrote. D’Claire-na just gave me a confused look and didn’t comment.

“They attack other Magical Girls?” Clarice guessed.

D’Claire-na sighed again. “It’s the eyes and the mannerisms. Gosh I would have thought you’d get one of them…” She seemed actually disappointed in us.

“THE EYES?” I asked, re-engaging her.

“Yeah, the green color our eyes turn once we’ve eaten that precious chemical from a Magical Girl source. No clue why it is, maybe something MGI put inside us.”

Now that I think about it I guess D’Claire-na and Aurelia both do have green eyes. I hadn’t really ever considered that anything weird.

“But clearly neither of you knew that. So how will the public know? The other sign of someone being irregular is just the shaky mannerisms that come from not getting their chemical from MGI pills which include a calming component which helps you relax. Once your body is used to it it’s pretty hard to go back.”

“So what you’re saying-” King spoke up, “Is that they’ll use the ignorance regarding Fallen Magical Girls to their advantage to make some group just take their word for it when they say we have Fallen.”

“Correct!” D’Claire-na nodded.

“So as long as we keep taking our meds in secret, and we are able to convince these incoming girls it was a false report, we should be good?” King posited.

D’Claire-na shrugged, her chains lifting slightly before returning to dragging along the ground. “I suppose so. But MGI isn’t gonna just let you do that. They need to think you’ve been defeated or they’ll just send another group.”

“CAN WE RUN?” I asked.

“Well, you could. Let’s say you don’t get caught, eventually you still run out of pills and become Spawn. Let’s say you decide to fight Spawn to eat them to fight off the transformation, then MGI eventually notices someone taking their kills. It just isn’t that easy.”

Clarice let out a large sigh. “We really are in a tough situation.”

“LET’S STOP THE GUESSING GAMES! JUST TELL US WHAT YOU THINK WE SHOULD DO!” I stomp my foot at D’Claire-na.

“If I was you? Fight.” She shrugged. “I mean if you can continue to win your fights here on your home turf eventually they’ll leave you alone as long as you stay in your area.”

“Your reason for saying that?” Clarice asked.

“It’s happened before. Once they abandon this area they’re going to say it’s fallen to the Spawn. They’ll let loose whatever Spawn they’ve got stored here and allow this area to become their hunting grounds. If you beat every group they send eventually it stops making sense to send more. They’ll leave you to plan B and just let you eventually turn into a Spawn.”

King shook his head, “They’d really just let us bide our time until finally we emerge from our area savage Spawn?”

“Why not. The Spawn lose lots of their intelligence from before they entered the cocoon. Magical Girls who eventually transform into Spawn are a higher class type, but they’re still too bestial to really compare to their abilities prior to the transformation.”

“Hmm.” Was all King said. He and Clarice seemed deep in thought over what they had heard.

D’Claire-na turned to me again, “And hey, once this area is marked taken over by Spawn it’ll be much easier for your old pal Marcia to visit!”

I glared at her, she knew bringing up Marcia was an easy way to push my buttons. I furiously scribbled a response. “HAVE YOU HEARD FROM HER OR AURELIA?”

D’Claire-na shook her head, “Sorry, I’d tell you how she is, but one of them ATE my delivery Spawn. Why? I haven’t got a clue.” She spit at the ground. “That woman knows she can push me away and I can’t do anything about it. Stuck here and all.”

She turned back to Clarice and King. “Hey, keep that in mind. I mean I’m stuck here, which means it is really in my best interests you all don’t get killed. Think about it, Magical Girls come here and kill you all, they very well might find me and take my head without me being able to even put up a resistance!”

“We believe you.” King said. “There wasn’t ever a question about that.”

Clarice suddenly rubbed her head messing her hair up, “UGH! I don’t know, let's just wait and see what happens! This hurts my head to think about all these what ifs! I’ll fight when I gotta fight!”

“And we won’t lose.” King added.

Clarice turned to me, “Anything else to talk about with this chained information bank? Otherwise let’s go take a bath. I'm exhausted from all this thinking.”

“I miss baths…” D’Claire-na murmured in a sad voice.

I didn’t really know what else I felt like I needed to know right now. It sounds like I’m not getting any more pills, and there isn’t much I can do about MGI abandoning us. “ANY CHANCE YOU WILL HAVE YOUR SPAWN HELP US FIGHT?”

D’Claire-na chuckled at my question. “Like the tiny delivery Spawn or the spying Spawn? Sure, I’ll tell them to jump in to save you if they ever get the chance!”

“THANKS.” I held up.

With that Clarice and I made our way back into the hallway. D’Claire-na shouted a goodbye as we rounded the corner. We returned up the elevator to the dorm floor. The two of us grabbed Tikki and the three of us, plus a blindfolded King, hit the bath.

Even in these uncertain times I am happy to at least get to have good friends at my side. Tomorrow I will tell Tikki everything.