The Words I Had to Say

The trip to the resort was a long but anticipated one, the bus trundling its way across the snowy mountainside of Nagano. The two girls sat snuggly side by side the entire way, Hinoka's head resting on Miyami's shoulder and Miyami's head resting on top of hers as road noise hummed by.

Eventually, they arrived amidst the late morning, building coming into view. The ryokan itself was small and secluded, nestled in a forest clearing a good distance from the main road. It was built into the mountainside, outer walls and roof blending in with the snow-covered scenery.

The two of them were greeted by a middle-aged woman upon entering, her black hair tied up in a bun and her warm smile accentuated by a few light lines on her face. From there, it was the usual process of checking in and receiving the room key, finding a place to store their shoes, and retrieving a pair of slippers before heading to their room.

And wow, was it amazing.

The soft whiteness of the room melded with the heated air as the two stepped inside, instantly creating a pleasant atmosphere. Futons were folded away in the closet for the moment, allowing a large space in the center of the room to stretch out. Sliding shōji doors lined the sides of the space and a small TV sat on a shelf in the corner, but the main attraction was their private bath out back: a rock-lined tub of blue-green, steamy water.

"So this is what a private onsen looks like, huh?" Hinoka's eyes lit up as she glanced at it through the glass. "What do you think?"

Miyami could scarcely contain her excitement, nearly quivering with joy. "It's… wonderful!"

The two giggled at the reaction, the taller of them turning to her girlfriend to give her a hug. "Thank you so much for planning all of this!"

"Hah, you better. This is way more expensive than a rental," Hinoka said. She wrapped her arms around the dark-haired girl, pulling her downward. "Just kidding. It's worth it seeing you happy."

"…" Miyami's cheeks flushed red as a kiss brushed against her forehead. "D-did you want to wash and get right to it or…?"

She pondered the idea, then nodded. "Mhm. I'm not that hungry just yet, and it'll probably be better after we get rid of the sweat and grime from the ride here."

"Sweat and grime? But we just sat the entire time."

"Pft, you really need a reason? You're the one who prompted." She grinned and gave her a squeeze before separating. "Fine, I just want to get naked with my hot and cute girlfriend. Happy?"

Miyami couldn't bring herself to respond, still flustered by the bluntness despite being exposed to it so often.

"Heh." The girl stuck out her tongue playfully. "Figures, so go ahead and undress, okay?"

"…Okay."

***

After the two of them had cleansed themselves in the room's washroom, it didn't take long until they'd ventured outside, briefly exposed to the freezing chill of winter air. The onsen itself was decently large, easily able to accommodate the sapphic couple.

They stepped along the stone walkway, bare feet padding against smooth rock. Steam rose from the water's surface like clouds of warmth, obscuring their vision slightly. Once they reached the edge though, it was easy enough to find their footing.

"Oooh, this is perfect~!"

Hinoka went first, slowly submerging herself in the water to escape the cold. A hand beckoned her partner to join, a grin on her face. "Come on, Miyami! Don't keep me waiting."

"…" Her girlfriend was too busy blushing, eyes focused on the other girl's body. She was so used to seeing it at this point, and yet, the sight always mesmerized her. "Erm, r-right."

She followed her girlfriend's lead, stepping into the bath one foot at a time, feeling the hot water rise up her legs. The heat instantly embraced her, seeping into every inch of her skin as she sunk into the depths.

"A-ah~! It feels amazing~!"

"Right?" The two of them sat down on the submerged rock, acting as a bench. "Damn. Don't think I've felt this relaxed since… ever, actually."

Miyami hummed and nodded her head, leaning back against the rocks. The same went for her, although, that was probably because she'd never had access to anything like this before—ever.

"…"

She closed her eyes as they started to water, enjoying the moment and not wanting to cry. Of all the experiences she'd had the pleasure of having in this world, there was something magical about this one in particular, although she wasn't entirely sure why.

Was it because this was one of the bigger items on her list?

Was it the feeling of their bodies pressed against each other, or the way their skin tingled from the warmth of the water?

Was it the soft sound of the winter ambience, the birds chirping, and the wind whispering through the leaves?

Or was it simply the presence of Hinoka beside her? Her warmth, her scent, and her love.

The water churned a little as the streak-haired girl shifted, resting her head on Miyami's shoulder and running a hand along her beneath the water.

"…" She opened her eyes, tears escaping into the bath as she felt the urge to say something.

"Hinoka?"

"Mmm, this about my wandering hands?"

She giggled, a light laugh mixed with a sniffle. "N-no, but I don't mind them."

"Oh? You don't?"

Miyami shook her head. "No. I…" Her voice choked, words melting away in her throat.

"…" Hinoka seemed to sense her struggle and smiled. "I think I understand, you don't have to say anything." She leaned up to kiss her girlfriend, lips ready to meet.

The taller girl shook her head though, denying it, as much as she'd like to just accept. "No, I… I need to say it out loud. I want to."

"…" Amber eyes stared deeply at her, fogged from the water. "Alright then, go on, my penguin princess." The girl leaned back against her shoulder.

Miyami took a breath, trying to put her feelings into words.

Her voice answered.

"I'm just… really glad we met. That we're together, like this. I know it hasn't always been easy, and I know there's going to be more challenges in the future, but I wouldn't change anything. I wouldn't change any of it."

Her hand squeezed her girlfriend's. "When I came here, I just wanted to find a safe place, a new life. To be myself, to be accepted, to exist without having to worry about what other people think. And while I certainly know that the change in scenery and my uncle's acceptance of me set things up… you've been my guiding star since we've met, Hinoka."

She raised her other hand to her partner's cheek, caressing it softly. "The way you've supported me, loved me, cared for me, it's been the most incredible feeling in my life. Even when we've argued or fought, or when I've been too anxious to speak, you've always there for me."

"…"

"I don't know where I'd be if I hadn't met you that day—if I'd run away instead, or what would have happened if we never grew close, but I know that I'd be missing out on the girl who's helped me become me." Tears streamed as her vision blurred, but she kept focus, intent on saying the last of her thoughts.

"So thank you, Hinoka. Thank you for loving me."

They stared at each speechless in the winter air, broken by nothing but the sound of water. Her girlfriend quivered slightly at the words, her own eyes tearing up too.

"You… dummy." She buried her face in Miyami's shoulder, sobbing silently. "You can't just spill your heart out like that while we're naked. Crap."

The dark-haired girl giggled and rubbed her back. "I'm sorry. I just wanted to tell you that before we continued."

"No, don't apologize. It's just, damn. What do I say to that? 'I love you too?' She sniffled, then raised her head to stare back at her partner. "To think that I'm the one who's speechless this time."

They settled in silence again, letting the moment wash over them. Eventually, the streak-haired girl wiped away her tears, smiling.

"You're welcome, Miyami."

The woman's cheeks flushed. "H-huh?"

"No clarification, you thanked me, so I'm saying, 'you're welcome'. That's all."

"…" Miyami flushed harder. "I-I see. Well, uh—"

She was cut off. "Anyways, I think that's enough seriousness, despite how much I love your sappiness." Hinoka's hands roamed again beneath the water, moving to her girlfriend's chest. "If we're going to get frisky, I'd rather not start while crying, yeah?"

She squirmed a bit, embarrassed as the wholesomeness suddenly bled into something else. "H-Hinoka! B-but we were having a moment! N-now isn't the time to—"

"To feel you up? On the contrary, now is the best time!" Her partner grinned mischievously and leaned in, lips inches from hers.

"After all, I love your voice. And after hearing it so much again?"

A kiss.

"…I'd love to hear a lot, lot more~"