Side Story: The First Day of Lina's Maidly Duties (Or: How Lina Almost Destroyed the Manor)

The morning sun had barely risen when the screaming started.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, 'POLISH THE SILVER'?!"

Sebas stood ramrod straight in the grand dining hall, his gloved hands clasped behind his back as Lina brandished a tarnished spoon like a weapon. The lord, who had been peacefully reviewing documents in his study, heard the crash of what sounded like an entire tea set hitting the marble floors and decided to take a peek.

Lina stared at the mountain of ornate cutlery laid out before her with undisguised horror. "There's hundreds of these stupid forks!"

"One hundred and forty-seven pieces, to be exact," Sebas corrected smoothly. "The Haulus family silver dates back three centuries. You will polish each one until you can see your reflection."

"Why does one family need this many spoons?!" Lina grabbed a handful and tossed them into the polishing basin with a clatter.

"Those are soup spoons," Sebas said, his eye twitching. "You just mixed them with the dessert spoons."

"WHO CARES?!"

Sebas inhaled sharply. "The proper order is—"

Lina dunked the entire tray into soapy water.

Sebas made a noise like a teakettle about to explode.

**Doing Laundry**

"You burned the linens?!"

Lina crossed her arms defiantly. "You said 'use hot water'! How was I supposed to know the stove would catch fire?!"

Sebas stared at the smoldering remains of what had once been a set of 500-thread-count bedsheets. "…You put laundry on the stove?"

"IT WAS A LOGICAL CONCLUSION!"

The lord, peeking into the room, slowly backed away.

Lina, armed with a feather duster, had apparently decided the best way to clean the library was to aggressively whack every shelf until the dust flew into the air like a blizzard.

By the time Sebas arrived, she was sneezing violently, surrounded by a mushroom cloud of ancient grime, while several priceless first-edition books lay on the floor in what could only be described as casualty formation.

"I… I think I won?" Lina rasped, wiping her nose on her sleeve.

Sebas looked at the destruction. Then at Lina. Then at the heavens, as if asking, Why me?

Dinner was supposed to be simple.

Key word: supposed to.

"WHY IS THERE A GOAT IN THE KITCHEN?!" Sebas bellowed.

Lina, standing atop the counter with a rolling pin in hand, yelled back: "YOU SAID WE NEEDED FRESH INGREDIENTS!"

The goat, chewing contentedly on a lace tablecloth, bleated in agreement.

The lord, who had been hiding in his study with a bottle of wine, finally emerged—only to immediately turn around and walk back in.

*The Aftermath of Whatever Happened*

That evening, Sebas stood in the ruins of the manor, his usually pristine uniform covered in soap stains, goat hair, and what appeared to be jam.

Lina, meanwhile, had passed out on a couch, still clutching a stolen pastry in one hand.

The lord sighed. "So… how did her first day go?"

Sebas slowly turned to face him. His left eyelid was spasming. "My lord." His voice was eerily calm. "I would like to resign."

The lord patted his shoulder. "Denied."

Somewhere in the distance, the goat belched.