Gambling in the Desert

So this is what being dead feels like. I thought to myself as an icy gust of wind swept across my back. My entire body let out a shiver while a gritty sensation enveloped my face.

Wait, what the-?...

My eyelids abruptly shot open, as I inhaled a combination of air and sand into my mouth. Lifting my head up and shaking the sand out of my disheveled red hair, I fell backwards onto my back, staring up at the night sky.

“How the heck am I alive?” I took a moment to feel myself up and down, just to make sure.

The last thing I remembered was choking on a roulette ball in that sketchy casino and now here I was in the middle of the desert… completely stripped of all my clothes with the exception of my tighty-whities. I couldn't help but wonder if that beverage, that I had assumed was water, had been spiked. It sort of made me wonder if I imagined the whole choking incident.

“Well, I doubt things can get any wor-.”

My attention was suddenly drawn to the moon… or at least where the moon should have been. Illuminating the sky above me was a giant white and blue poker chip.

“Yeah, I'm definitely tripping on something.”

I didn't know how or why the heck I ended up all the way out here or even how far I was from civilization, but staying put probably wasn't the best idea.

Fighting my overwhelming fatigue, I stood up and faced the giant poker chip in the sky. Even though it was probably just a hallucination, I decided that was my sign to go in that direction. Struggling to stay up right, I stumbled onward, one foot at a time.

Of all the moments in my life, it was safe to say this was my all time lowest. At this point, I was almost looking forward to getting reprimanded by my parents when I got home. There was nothing that could be worse than this…

For an hour, I miserably trekked across the nighttime dune covered landscape, fighting to keep my eyes open. To make matters worse, I was experiencing an extreme level of discomfort due to being stripped of all my clothes. My feet were covered in throbbing blisters, as the frigid night air nipped at my almost nude body.

“I don't know how much longer I can-.” At this point everything became a blur, as my exhaustion got the best of me. Finally succumbing, I toppled over to the ground, fast asleep.

🎲🎲🎲

Once again, my consciousness returned to me, as I was abruptly awoken by a blunt object getting jammed into my stomach. Blinding sunlight flooded into my eyes as they opened back up.

“So you get your sick kicks from streaking, do ya, partner?” A gruff sounding voice spoke in my ear, followed by a few more jabs.

“Can you quit that? It's not what it looks-.” I paused mid sentence, as I wasn't particularly sure how to process the scene that had come into view around me.

“I swear, these gamblords think they can do whatever they want!” Another voice shouted this time.

My eyes became wide like a deer in headlights.

I still have to be tripping on something.

As I glanced up at the sky, I noticed that like the moon last night, the sun was also missing. In its place was a glowing yellow and red poker chip.

“What have you got to say for yourself, partner?” The gruff voice continued pressing me.

“What the heck are you!?” I exclaimed, as I jumped to my feet.

“What, are you stupid? I'm the town sheriff.”

Circled around me was a crowd of about a dozen two foot tall anthropomorphic dice. Each of which varied in color. The one in particular that was confronting me was green with white colored pips. His face was located on his four dotted side, where the top two dots made up his eyes and his mouth was located between the bottom two. Sitting on top of his head was a brown cowboy hat and in his hand, he held a wooden police baton.

“This guy seems like a really sick freak.” A blue dice man with a chef's hat chimed in.

“Please do something, Sheriff. I can't have my children exposed to this degeneracy.” A pink dice woman noted, as she covered two smaller dice persons’ eyes with her hands.

As I stood in my underwear, surrounded by dice people, I had to smack myself across my face to make sure I wasn't dreaming… The pain was definitely real, so it seemed unlikely. “Stay away from me! I know you're all just hallucinations.” I began to spazz out.

The dice sheriff held up his plastic star shaped police badge. “Don't try resisting, partner! You're under arrest for public inde-.”

Before he could finish, I leapt over the small group of dice people surrounding me and made a break for it. Unfortunately, there weren't many places for me to hide without being noticed. All of the facade old West themed structures that made up the small town, were half scaled to be in proportion with these dice people.

“Go get ‘em, sheriff!” The dice people cheered, as the sheriff mounted a brown stick horse. Galloping with all his might, with a lasso now in hand, he pursued me.

Still a bit battered from the night before and not having the energy to outrun him for long, I ducked myself into the nearest building. Inside, I locked the door behind me and wedged a miscellaneous wooden chair under the handle.

The building I was in had no windows and was made from brick. Unlike the Western theme of the rest of the town, this structure was incredibly plain. The room I was inside of was pretty much empty except for…

Is that a giant ball of twine?

A fist pounded at the door. “Get out here right now, partner, and don't you dare lay a hand on Matthew!” The sheriff's voice boomed from outside.

I couldn't help but chuckle. “Wait, the twine ball has a name?”

“Seriously, I'm not joking around, partner!”

I walked over to Matthew, who was on top of a granite pedestal. “Oh, and what will happen if I touch him.” I taunted the sheriff.

“I swear, if you do anything to him, I'll make sure you regret the day you were born, partner!” He banged on the door more aggressively.

Now that I thought about it, I towered over these dice people in stature. What was I so afraid of? I still wasn't exactly sure where I was and what was going on. Part of me still wondered if this was all in my head, but I wasn't about to let some dice tell me what to do…

I went up to the ten ton ball and started poking at it like a smartass. “Too bad for you. I'm rubbing my grimmie hands all over Matthew as we spe-.”

The 50 foot diameter ball of twine unexpectedly budged off of it's pedestal. Unable to stop it because of its immense weight, I could only sit and stare, as it rolled down and crashed through the wall just to the right of the entrance. The ball continued rolling until came to a halt by smashing through the front of a building labeled ‘Saloon’.

My mouth hung open as I stood frozen, staring through the massive gaping hole that had been left by Matthew. “...” I was at a loss for words.

“You have the right to remain silent, partner!” The sheriff announced, as a rope came flying out of nowhere, looping around my arms and torso.

“Wait, just hear me out-.”

He cut me off. “Tell it to the judge.”

With me now captured, he paraded me out of the damaged brick building. The dozen or so other dice town folk cheered, as the sheriff walked me toward the jail.

I was wrong. My luck definitely could get worse…