Chapter 1

“My point. Good sir. Is that I plan to build a HAREM… given that we just got—” The fat man rolled his hands forward, about three cycles, his unwashed belly button jiggling every time. “—y’know? This plan of mine involves three simple steps: Get OP real quick, impress some chicks, and make some kids! But since it’s like this…”

Teri scanned the room. There’s twenty people here. Slowly, they're forming groups. A part of him was glad that at least one person found him friendly to approach. Which is understandable. It seems that they all woke up in this room without any recollection of what happened before. Except that Teri remembered exactly what happened. He just didn’t want to ask. And looking at the fat man, he realized that really didn’t want to.

They’re in a garden of roses, supposedly. That explains the fragrant smell in the air. Looking at it, the roses were bleeding ink—some were outright leaking like an almost broken faucet. That explains another smell, which made Teri remember his childhood of sticking markers up his nose. Good times. But that’s besides the fact that everything in this room is made of paper. When he tried touching a rose before, it felt like an actual rose. It felt like his eyes were tricking him. The same goes with the rocks, the walls. The ground. And glancing at the fat man once more, Teri decided to test his theory some other time. What felt like an actual piece of paper was the pieces falling upon them like snow. Looking at it altogether gives him a sense of pity and dread, the mere thought forces him to make a fist to prepare for “something.”

The worst part is that the fat man smells like sweat and semen. And every time he moves to show him these things, his smell slowly wafts to his face to slap it. But he’s earnest. Teri could give him that.

“…I’m afraid that this dungeon isn’t where I can get stupidly OP.” The fat man’s gaze sharpened. Within the next second. He violated Teri’s personal space and put his arm over his shoulder; the other arm guided his eyes all over the room. “This is a horror dungeon. One that requires careful exploration, picking the right fights, and teamwork. Do not be lulled by this room’s beauty. DO NOT EVEN ADMIRE IT. If you go out there, thinking that you’re in a museum or a themepark… I guarantee that the next room over will fuck you in the ass—and not in a way that I like.”

Teri tried to forget the sensation of the man’s wet armpits pressing against his shoulder. He failed. “What makes you so sure?”

“I have prior experience.” There’s a level of confidence in the fat man’s words. And a bit of shame, for some reason. “I have been in these games before.”

Teri couldn’t help but smile. For a second, the man felt like he’s not compensating for something. He knows things. That’s something Teri could believe in.

“I have a plan to get stupidly OP and get some chicks. You…” The man looked away and back to him. “You probably want to survive and get out of his hellhole. See, we have something in common. We can work together. We can be bros—”

“I’m in,” Teri said.

“Sorry what?”

“I’m in,” Teri said once more. There’s really no point in overselling himself. It was also getting sadder the more he spoke about his plans.

The fat man blinked. Three times, with his eyes getting a bit redder each one. His face froze. He held up his finger. “Excuse me,” he said with his voice tight and constrained. He turned his back on Teri, walked a few steps, and gave himself a fist bump. He also jumped a few times, his rolls of fat jiggling every time he landed. As a bonus, he caught the man’s asscrack in the corner of his eyes.

After hyping himself up, the man fixed his jogging pants and finally covered his belly button. He faced Teri, smiling wide and relieved. The sort of face someone makes upon finally making their first friend. Teri saw the man approach and offered him a handshake, but the man ignored his cue and went for a hug instead.

It was tight. It had a smell that Teri would not rather describe. But Teri smiled. It was earnest. He chose to hug the man back, and both of them made these little jumps that children do. It was somewhat refreshing.

It was the fat man that broke out of the hug first. Then finally, he shook Teri’s hands. “Call me Taku. I’ll think about my Wizard name later. But for now I promise you, my friend. We’re gonna get all the bitches!” He raised his voice, which earned him a few glances from other parties. “And when the time comes for me to choose my one and only… I can give you first dibs on the other girls I rejected.”

“I’m Teri. Please don’t say that out loud.”

“Duly noted, Teri.” Taku gave him two thumbs up. He tried to make his face as cold and solid as stone, but it broke into a giddy smile. “So what should I call you?”

“Me?”

“Buddy. Pal. Comrade. Companion. Partner. Confidant. Bro. BEST FRIEND. Besties. Chum. Brother—”

“Please don’t call me brother.”

“Gotcha…” Taku grabbed his hand with a straight face and shook it himself. He invaded his personal space again, but he appreciated that he didn’t ask any questions why. “…Best friend. AND MOVING FORWARD, we gotta get your gear. The crates are at the back. There’s twenty of them, so one for each person in the room. Everyone else decided that once you pick your box, you cannot change—and you seem to be a warrior type, so I hope you get something good like a cool sword or armor.”

“And you’re going to be a wizard?”

“Yep… I mean look at me.” Taku chuckled. “You have a tight rockin’ bod. You prolly went to the gym a lot. In my case, the easiest way for me to be stupidly OP is to be a wizard and sling spells. Which is not bad.”

“Are you sure that magic exists here?”

“My best friend…” Taku wagged his finger at him. “We woke up in this dungeon after we died. Everything is made of paper. The roses still smell of roses while it bleeds ink all over the place. And for some reason all of us know that we have to proceed and reach the tenth floor to escape. I’m pretty sure that magic exists here. Though I think it won’t be as cool as I think… but I can find a way to be stupidly OP.”

Taku is absolutely right. “Hey.” There’s just one thing that’s bugging his mind. It’s been like this for a while now, and there’s no need to fear his new friend thinking he's dumb or anything.

The man smiled excitedly. “Yes?”

“OP. What does that mean?”

“Oh, overpowered,” Taku said without a hint of anything. “Means you’re crazy strong. Stupidly OP means… Well, you’re so strong that it's stupid to try to explain how or why you’re like that.”

“I like that.”

“Yeah.” Taku stretched his hands towards the crates as though to cast a spell. “Me too, best friend. Me too.”

Teri smiled. Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he watched the torn pieces of paper fall over them as they walked toward the crates. For now, he could forget about what happened. He and this guy will get along just fine.