A Dream and Reincarnation

A young girl sat trembling, covering her ears. She tried with all her strength to block out any sound, though it was clearly a futile effort.

Shouts and curses filled the air. Two adult voices hurled insults at each other, a man and a woman.

The little girl kept trying to make herself smaller, as if she wished the two would forget she even existed.

“How many times have I told you, you shouldn’t have done that! Now look what’s happened!”

“You’re blaming me!? After everything’s turned out like this, you have the nerve to raise your voice at me!?”

“Of course it’s your fault! How dare you deny it now. Are you stupid!? Is your brain actually broken!?”

“Y-You damn whore!”

Then came the sounds of things being thrown and smashed. The girl flinched, startled by the violent noise.

Tears streamed down her cheeks as she mumbled incoherent words.

Is this my fault again?

The two fighting were her father and mother. She was their daughter. That is, if they still even considered her that.

She didn’t understand. Even though she was old enough to think, she still couldn’t grasp why her parents were always like this, always shouting, always glaring at each other with hatred.

She had seen other families. Families where parents smiled, spoke kindly to each other, and loved their children.

But her family was nothing like that. It had always been like this, for as long as she could remember.

“Where is she!?”

“!!”

She flinched again, hearing her father’s furious voice approaching the room where she was hiding.

Her room was dark, and she was curled up inside a closet, desperately hoping she wouldn’t be found.

W-What should I do?

She panicked, unable to move, too scared and lacking the courage to run.

A moment later, her door was flung open violently. She clamped her hands over her mouth to keep herself from crying out, trying to make not even the slightest sound.

She could hear her father tearing through her room, shouting her name as he ransacked everything.

Her body trembled harder.

She was terrified.

This time, her father’s rage was far beyond anything she had ever experienced in her entire life.

W-What should I do? What should I do?

Repeating the same question over and over in her mind, the girl desperately tried to come up with a solution to escape this nightmare.

But the overwhelming fear and sense of crisis made it impossible to think clearly.

Instead of solutions, her mind filled with more and more terrifying scenarios, each one worse than the last.

With each horrible vision, her body trembled harder, and her thoughts became more paralyzed.

Her breathing grew labored. She felt as if her lungs were freezing, each breath stabbing her chest like ice.

All she could do was pray, prayer was the only thread left holding her sanity together.

Then suddenly, a loud bang, the closet door flung open. She flinched.

Before she could see anything or even scream, she felt a hand grab her arm, harshly and violently.

No, no, no, no….

Nothing had happened yet, but she could already see what was coming.

She wanted to resist, but she knew from experience, that it would only make things worse.

There was nothing she could do. In the end, she surrendered to whatever would come next.

Her body grew colder. Sweat drenched her skin.

She looked up, trying to see her father’s face.

A blinding light hit her eyes, making her squint.

That… what is….

“Gakhh…”

Her throat was seized. Her body lifted into the air, dangling. Her legs kicked frantically, desperately searching for support.

I… I can’t breathe.

A crushing pressure gripped her windpipe. She couldn’t inhale, couldn’t scream, just choke.

When it felt like this might truly be the end, the world suddenly darkened.

The hand on her neck vanished. Her body dropped, jarring her senses as she hit something.

She blinked, startled. Her surroundings had changed completely.

***

“Hahhh… hahhh… hahhh…”

Rosalia looked around, her breath ragged, forehead furrowed.

Her face was pale, and her forehead drenched in sweat.

After a few moments of gathering her thoughts, Rosalia finally returned to full awareness.

A dream?

She let out a small sigh, relieved to realize that the terrible experience she'd just endured was only a dream.

No, it wasn't that it never happened.

“It seems you're fully awake now.”

Rosalia turned toward the voice, El.

Did he realize I was dreaming something awful?

“How long was I asleep?”

“Only a few hours. I tried waking you by channeling my mana, but it didn’t work.”

“Thank you. I did feel something cold earlier, maybe that was you.”

Rosalia gave a wry smile and lowered her head, slightly embarrassed at showing such a vulnerable side.

She didn’t blame El. These things happened often. Even before she’d escaped from home, nightmares about her past life on Earth haunted her regularly.

She looked back at El, clearly bothered by something.

“I won’t ask anything. Your past isn’t really important to me.”

Perhaps sensing her discomfort, El responded calmly.

Rosalia truly appreciated his understanding.

“Sorry. It’s not that I don’t want to talk about it…”

Rosalia looked gloomy. Her former life wasn’t something she felt comfortable sharing.

She was always afraid someone might find out about her past.

Combined with the pain from her current life for her family in this world, it made her even more unwilling to speak of it.

She wished her life on Earth had been just a dream, that it hadn’t really happened.

But she couldn’t deny it. No matter what she wished, her past life had been real.

She was a reincarnator. This wasn’t her first life.

El remained silent, not offering any comment.

Perhaps that was his way of showing care.

“I’ll go back to sleep.”

“Yes, rest well, Rosalia.”

As a spirit, El didn’t rely on sleep. They had already agreed earlier that he would stay on watch while she got a full rest to recover her stamina.

Rosalia lay down, trying to close her eyes. Her bedding was nothing more than a few layers of cloth with no softness at all, but it was enough to shield her slightly from the cold ground at night.

The space around her was surprisingly comfortable, and she had set up a magic tool near her to warm the air. It was one of the useful devices she had taken from the assassins, a small mercy she was thankful for.

Minutes passed, but her sleepiness had completely vanished.

She opened her eyes again, unable to see much due to the lack of light.

“El… do you know anything about reincarnation?”

Rosalia didn’t really know why she asked.

She regretted it the moment the words left her lips, but there was no taking it back now.

“Unlike humans, spirits don’t had the concept of death. When something happens to a spirit in the mortal world, something that causes it to vanish or fade, its consciousness returns to the spirit realm, merges with it, and eventually takes form again.”

El didn’t answer her question directly. Instead, he explained something entirely different.

Rosalia, surprised by what he said, momentarily forgot her original question.

“Eh? Really? That’s the first time I’ve ever heard that.”

She turned her body and faced El, her curiosity piqued.

She hadn’t expected that spirits couldn’t truly die. That contradicted everything she had read before.

“It’s not something spirits like to talk about. If people knew how easily spirits could return, the way they’re treated would become far worse.”

Rosalia nodded in understanding.

“That makes sense. Even now, there are many who treat spirits badly.”

She recalled stories of people treating spirits like convenient tools, many of them met terrible ends from the wrath of those very spirits.

Wait… then why did El tell me so easily?

She grew puzzled. It was surprising that El would share something so important without hesitation.

“Because spirits can reincarnate, I also know that other races and beings can too.”

El didn’t seem bothered by her concern. In fact, he went on to say something even more surprising.

Rosalia grew anxious and awkward, unsure how to react.

She decided to remain quiet, just listening to what El had to say.

“Sometimes, a few mortals experience. They usually become exceptional figures in their eras.”

“W-Well. This is the first time I’ve heard something like this. Could it be… maybe there are lot of them out there?”

Rosalia asked nervously, her words clearly laced with a deeper meaning.

“That’s not possible.”

But El denied it right away.

Rosalia mumbled in confusion. Even though her question hadn’t been all that serious, she was curious why El seemed so certain.

“Spirits can persist without dying because of the laws of the spirit realm itself. Do you know why some mortals are able to reincarnate even though they’re bound by death?”

El turned the question back to Rosalia, prompting her to think.

Since the day she was born into this world, Rosalia had occasionally wondered the same thing:

Why was I reborn here?

But no matter how often she asked, she had never found the answer.

“Do you know, El?”

She asked softly, almost hesitantly, as if she didn’t actually want to know.

She was afraid. Afraid that the answer would be something too heavy for her to bear.

“I’m not sure myself.”

El’s answer brought a sigh of relief from Rosalia.

In the end… I’m still not ready.

She quietly scolded herself, recognizing how fragile her resolve still was.

Turning her back to El, she decided to try sleeping again.

Closing her eyes, her thoughts drifted back to the moment she had been reincarnated into this world.

Hope, and disappointment.

Let’s put that aside for now.

Rosalia finally decided not to dwell on it any longer.

For now, she just wanted to escape this kingdom as soon as possible.

Her top priority was her life.

Everything else, she would think about later.