A Fantasy World's First Modern Traveling Salesman

It took about two hours to reach the bottom of the valley from where I had awakened. The nearby village, situated by the river, was relatively small, but the locals were all out and about, going through their daily routines. An overcast sky remained, but that did not stop the lush green pines from shining as they towered over the houses like a wall.

Once more, my doubts about this entire incident were washed away as I witnessed the very real fantasy world come alive. The village's architecture was of the medieval era, and its inhabitants matched the aesthetic with their attire. It was a living museum, almost, and it felt like at any moment the entire populace would scream out with cameras and phones recording me, 'Sike, got ya. Did you actually think you were sent to another world? That wolf back there was an animatronic!'

But no surprise prank was on the horizon. On second thought, a better comparison to the vibe here would be a Renaissance fair. Only no cosplay elf-girls were bobbing for apples or a misplaced pirate-king axe-throwing. This was the real deal.

Even though I passed through the entrance quietly without bringing attention to myself, my presence was turning heads with suspicious looks. Social anxiety in general tortures me enough as it is, so this kind of attention was quickly getting to me.

Is it that obvious that I don't belong?

The clothing I had on from my world was hopefully ambiguous enough to blend in… kind of. My recently bought blue outdoor jacket had no logo or noticeable features, keeping it from being a dead giveaway. My slim-cut hiking pants were black and had only a few pockets on the thigh area. Those paired with my black backpacking boots didn't give any obvious suggestion that I was not of this world. Hopefully, overly nosy folks, like the knight who rescued me, don't look too hard and blow my cover.

"Oi! You there!" a shrill voice spoke.

I turned to my right, and an older woman, seated outside a shack, was looking at me. From a quick observation, most of the buildings around had roofs covered in tiles or wood, but this one had a roof made of hay. Not to say she was poor, but her shack on the edge of the town already hinted at what kind of character I was about to have a conversation with.

"What are you, a noble?" the woman asked.

"Me?"

"Yeah, you," she beckoned with her hand.

"Oh, I'm not-," I said, now walking over, but verbally pausing.

Wait a minute. No one here knows who I am. No one has to know who I am… so I could be anyone. Why limit myself to the person I was back on Earth? I don't have to care if others are staring at me, because for all they know, I am a noble. I am someone important. Clearing my throat, I corrected my previous statement, "I meant to say, yes. I am a noble."

"I was about to say. Look at this, very nice, that is."

The old lady, without invitation, began to feel my jacket sleeve, admiring the texture with her wrinkly fingers. Not comfortable with this up-close admiration, I pulled my sleeve away.

"Easy now, that's the finest material where I come from. Woven by the great… Richard of Sportingood," I boasted.

"Ohhh, my apologies. Didn't mean anything by it. Just that not many fancy folk like you stop by here in Edmure."

"Well, does Edmure have a tavern or a town square I can visit? Preferably somewhere with a notice board or something like that?"

"That'll be at the crossroads near the center of town. Have something to post here? Have you lost a friend or family member?"

"No, but I am willing to see if there are any adventurers for hire."

The old lady's cheerful spirit then turned serious with a hint of confusion. "Adventurer? Like in those stories for children? Ha! There are no adventurers here, much less a need for one."

"So you don't have contracts or jobs to kill monsters or explore dungeons or anything like that?" I asked.

Like a cued audience in a sitcom, she bent over laughing as if I had told her the funniest joke ever. I looked around anxiously to see if anyone noticed our conversation, which was now a "laugh at the new guy" show.

"You're a funny one- such silly questions. There are no monsters here. The only thing you'll find in Edmure is goats and deer. Maybe a bear every so often, but no monsters," the old lady cackled.

"So no monsters. Not even dragons?"

"Dragons!? Ain't no dragons anymore. Don't they educate you high-class folk enough as it is? World's not seen a dragon in ages, love. Theys all dead."

"Huh," I pondered. I was about to correct and inform the woman of the very real and very large dragon I saw from the top of the forest line, but I didn't want to humiliate myself any further in the off-chance I hallucinated it. My preconceived notions about this world had stood corrected. It seems that there's no practice for adventurers or monster hunters here, either due to no need for them in this town or the fact that the job role doesn't exist. There goes my hopes of living out my 'video-game-adventurer-style' of life.

"Well, in that case, I'd like to find a place to sell anything I own." I cleared my throat, trying to redeem what little dignity I had left.

"That we have. You'll find some vendors with wares and the like at the crossroads. They'll buy and trade with you."

"Alright, thanks," I said, walking away.

"What's the rush, dear? I won't bite," she smiled. Half of her teeth were missing, and what was left was stained yellow. Not that I was put off, but I did my best not to look shocked and warmly waved her goodbye.

"You have a good day," I said as I departed.

"Feel free to stop by for a chat if you like, 'monster hunter,'" she called from behind.

Before I took off entirely, I turned back around. "Actually, I have one last question. How much would you say my jacket is worth? Like, if I were to sell it, how much would I be able to get for it?"

"Not that I have two 'cinders' to rub together to purchase that fancy tunic, but if I did… I'd say it'd go for a 'crown' or two."

"And, just what exactly is a 'cinder' and 'crown'?" I asked further.

The "crossroads" was just two dirt paths at the center of the village with modest activity to show for it. A herd of goats ran along the dirt road with a boy holding a large stick trailing them. While some villagers walked through the town center, others tended to their gardens or hung clothes to dry in front of their own homes. Chattering between the locals made up for most of the ambience, but the tranquil river babbling, just not too far, could still be heard. The place reminded me of the mountain towns I'd visit when traveling. This quaint village had the potential to be a tourist destination if these people were to take advantage of it.

And indeed, there were a few people with tarps set up, displaying their modest wares for sale, displayed on woolen clothes and blankets.

First step in starting a new life in a fantasy world: earn money.

Sucks that a wealthy king didn't summon me to save the world, and it doesn't seem like I'll be finding my new well-paying career as an adventurer anytime soon. So if I had to sleep in this new world with no idea of what to do next, I'd rather sleep the first night comfortably under a roof.

I stood at the center of the crossroad near a water well and set my backpack down to open it. My hand rummaged through the little items I had left of my hiking supplies. The day wasn't even done yet, and already I had lost my bear spray and flare gun. I would've preferred not to use them consecutively, but almost dying by a wolf was a sufficient circumstance to use them. What I needed now was a valuable item to sell. And thanks to the old lady, I now have a rough grasp of the currency of this kingdom and how to appraise goods and produce... at a novice level.

Selling my phone is off the table. It's the most expensive thing I have, sure, but I don't want to introduce this world to a modern-day smartphone so recklessly. Might as well force-feed a villager child a gallon of soda and flaming-crunch tacos from a fast-food restaurant while blinding them with flashing, LED-colored lights.

What could I sell? 

Something that can pass off for this time period, but enough to make some quick cash… or more accurately, coin. The remaining items in my backpack were a fifteen-foot rope, my rain jacket, a homemade first aid kit, a pen I used for school, a smashed protein bar, pain killers, and-

That could work.

I pulled out the latest item that will do me some good in this world, but instead of it saving my skin, it will, at the very least, buy me a bed for the night. Now I could do one-on-one bargaining with a merchant, but I don't have the best haggling skills yet to get the best deal. So, I figured I'd go with a live showcase to reach a larger audience and hopefully attract interested buyers.

"Step right up, ladies and gentlemen! Don't be shy. I come here before you today to give you the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to own the chalice of tomorrow!" I announced.

All the locals near the center of the village turned around to see what the commotion was. Now I've somewhat overcome the fear of stage fright, but the butterflies still flutter around as soon as I start to notice how many people are watching me. If I pretended like it were acting in a play, I could get by. It was the only way I was able to get through this rowdy display of public speaking without crippling by embarrassment. Today's show was 'The Traveling Merchant.'

"I come from a land so far and vast, it has yet to be mapped by this kingdom's scholars. Where I come from, advances in technology- I mean, the mechanical arts- have progressed at a rapid pace, ready to meet the needs of the common folk like you and me. Contraptions only the mind can dream of, made from priceless metals that have yet to be thoroughly mined. Everyone, I give you the 'Infinity Canteen'!"

Some 'oos' and 'ahs' were murmured in the crowd as they slowly inched forward to glance at what I was holding in my hand. It was a one-liter hiking canteen that I had bought the previous summer, but it was still as good as new. It was time to recoup my investment in this overpriced water bottle, and it honestly was. I made a bad habit of sparing no expense with my hobbies back on Earth.

"What's special about it?" a villager asked.

"I'm glad you asked. It holds your water to drink easily while on the go! And it is sealed tightly with a screwable lid. No leaks or spills when shut."

"That's nothing. I got one just like it," an unimpressed voice from the crowd yelled. My audience began to snicker and mumble in agreement with the heckler.

"Ah, true. While everyday bottles or waterskins can hold liquids just as well, this canteen, however, can keep a liquid cold for half a day. Fill this baby up with springwater in the morning, and it will be just as cold when drinking midday."

"Come off it," a lady spoke up.

"It's true! With its double-layered metal design, this container can retain water's temperature far better than anything else can. Just wash it with warm water and soap when needed, for a lifetime guarantee."

"How much for it?" another young woman asked.

"One crown," I said.

A look of disapproval and disinterest began to wash over the crowd, with some even starting to walk away.

Time to bring it home.

"But wait, there's more! This canteen is made from titanium. A metal strong as steel, but far lighter! Try for yourself and hold it," I offered.

I hand over the canteen to a small boy, and he lifts it up and down with his tiny arms with ease, as the adults around watch with amazement. He passes it to those nearby, who then curiously marvel at it.

"While I wouldn't recommend smashing it on the ground, this canteen is scratch-resistant and survives most falls with little to no dents at eye level."

I reach over to take back the canteen, then hold it up high with one last pitch to finish the live infomercial I was putting on.

"This is the only one in existence right now, so be the first to own the 'Infinity Canteen'! Buy now for a 'crown', and for one ten 'cinders' more, I'll throw in uhhh… a revolutionary writing quill that needs no ink pot to use," I offered as I brought out the pen from my backpack.

And just like that, the crowd began to close up on me, offering what they had in hand to trade with, while others ran back to their houses to fetch coins to buy the hot product before others could.

It's a shame I only had one of these. If only there were a factory in my backpack to make more of them, then I'd be this kingdom's James Dyson.

Nonetheless, with just two items, I made enough money in one day to spend a week at the local inn, if I wanted to, and then some.