Face on the Wall

It sprang forth, closing the distance between us in an instant.

I would love to tell you that I merely grinned; that I effortlessly sidestepped while tossing my hair back with a flourish; or that I gave it some sort of an aloof judo flip. You know, like how one of those super popular, confident and charming characters so often do in cartoons and anime when attacked by a weak villain or monster.

Seeing that thing fly at me, however....

"Ahhhhhhh!!!!"

....caused me to panic and fall—my hands flailing wildly in front of my face.

As I mentioned before, I was no arachnophobe. Quite the contrary, I found myself rather fond of the little creatures. Whenever I'd see one hanging out in his web in the corner of my room, I would simply leave him be. If anything, it was a welcome presence that would help keep out the truly pesky bugs, like houseflies. He would stay in his space, in his little web, up in the corner of my room, and I would stay in mine, and there would be a certain mutual respect between us.

This thing, however, so hungrily starring at me with these 8 bulbous eyes—its fangs feverishly twitching at my face—was no little creature. It certainly didn't have any respect for personal space, either. In fact, it was causing me to question my affinity for spiders alltogether.

I was on my back now, holding its front legs in either hand, keeping its famished fangs away my face with my foot, which I had firmly planted against its chin-sternum. Spiders, as you may or may not know, have a fused head and torso called a cephalothorax, so its chin and sternum were basically the same area. The pedipalps (please forgive my nerd-speak, it's a leftover remnant of my previous life as an overachiever)—aka those leg-looking-things between its mouth and actual legs—were scrapping and clawing at my ankle. 

And if this hideous face trying to devour mine wasn't horrifying enough: the stinking thing still had eight legs! 

And I could only defend myself against two. 

It didn't take long for the spider to realize this advantage and seek to capitalize on it.

Supporting itself on its hind four, the second pair were free. They jabbed away at my ribs, incessantly. 

Honestly, that was much more unnerving than painful. But it was still hurting me, just not as much as those fangs would if I allowed them to sink into me. 

This creature wasn't just going to bite once then go about its merry, skittering way. It would latch on and not let go until its poison completely paralyzed me. Then it would wrap me up in its inky web and drag me to the bottom of this cave, where it would keep me for a little midnight snack (I was, after all, too meager to be a full course meal).

Needless to say, I gave everything I had to preventing those fangs from even scratching me. But my physical strength was almost zero, and I was starting to see red flashes when the legs jabbed me in the ribs, which meant my HP was getting low.

I looked once more into the horror show that was the fiendish creature's mouth. If only I had something sharp...

Um—duh?

I lifted my other foot off the ground, planted it against this thing's underbelly and pressed off with both legs, freeing up my hands to cast.

"Ice Shard!"

Once again, ice coalesced before my outstretched palms. The spider shrieked as the air became colder. As if understanding what was about to happen, it seemed to make one last ditch effort: it lunged for my throat with all its might. 

Its fangs extended out, it's mouth opened wide—

And swallowed the icicle—launched from my palm in that last second—piercing through the back of its chitinous head.

"Suck on that!"

The Ice Shard made a super gross squelching sound as it punctured its brain, triggering an agonized hiss that quickly fizzled out. Being no longer controlled my its brain, all eight legs began erratically twitching every which way.

Unfortunately, I was still pinned beneath the vile fiend. I fought with all my meagre strength to kick and push this thing off me. 

I finally managed, after strenuous effort, but not before being drenched in the ink blood that spewed out from its mouth. I was now covered in it from head to toe.

Yuck!

With both hands I wiped the thick layer of icky goo dripping from my face, pulling it into a giant slimy gob.

Item received: 1 Vial of Inky Spider Goo.

I guess the game mechanics caused the vial I needed to hold the material to magically manifest. Because one appeared out of nowhere, holding the goo within it. It then quickly disappeared into my inventory.

Well, that was one mystery solved. It seemed like these quests were going to be easier than I thought! Now I just had to collect the webs, which I could see hanging everywhere, and then these... legs...

The creature had finally stopped twitching, at least enough so that I could seize hold of one of its legs. I grabbed hold and strained with all my might to tear it off.

Hrngh! hrngh!!! 

Nothing.

Maybe this one's legs just didn't drop for some reason.

Alrighty then...

I saw another spider, by the entrance of the cave.

Let's try another spell...

"Moonbeam!"

The Lime Moon, the nearest of the seven moons overhead, began to glow. A beam shot forth from it, engulfing the spider like a spotlight. It hissed as red 1s appeared and faded, signifying the damage I was doing. It wasn't enough however...

The spider skittered up to me, then lunged—

"Ice shard!"

—and met a similar fate as his brethren.

"Now," I said watching it roll over onto its back to die. "Let's hope the legs from this one come off a little easier..."

Hrngh! Hrngh!!!

Still nothing.

Darn. Maybe loot drops were randomized? 

I decided to enter the cave and kill more spiders. Hopefully, I'd find some way to harvest their legs.

***

"Ice shard!"

I was now well inside the cave, where I just killed my fifth spider. None had dropped legs so far. Clearly I was supposed to break them off myself, somehow. 

After this one rolled over onto its back, I decided I was going to get its legs off, one way or another. I put my foot against the abdomen, gripped the leg as hard as I could, then pressed down with all my weight while pulling up with my arms.

Hrngh!

To no avail. Like the others, the legs simply wouldn't budge.

Now standing on the dead creature's sternum with both feet, I held its leg firm against my chest, then threw myself backward with all my might.

Oof!

I hit the ground. Hard. The leg not only remained attached, but pulled the spider over as I fell—causing the thing to flip over and fall right down on top of me.

Ugh! 

I was now flat on my back. 

Five kills so far. And only one quest item. I'd gotten no legs, and I was already exhausted. "I need a knife..." I muttered to myself.

"I can help you with that..." said the shadowy face that manifested on the wall right before me.

"I'm sorry?" I answered, like an idiot. 

I was literally just warned—specifically—not to listen to him.

"There is a knife, in a chest," answered the shadow on the wall, smiling. 

It was a face, yes, but no human face, more of a jack-o-lantern face: two sinister, triangular eyes and a wide mouth filled with sharp teeth. 

In other words, really not the type of face you wanted to be taking advice from. 

But I needed a knife. "Where?" I asked.

I know what you're thinking: What?! Why would you listen to such a thing?!  

Well, the only other option was to go around looking for other players to help me—and I really did not feel like doing that. Besides, it was still smiling at me, so it seemed proper to be cordial with it.

"You'll find it on the far end of the next floor down. Just follow the tunnel down, you can't miss it," answered the face as its sinister smile deepened.

Although I was specifically told not to trust this very entity, he himself still deserved the benefit of the doubt, did he not? I mean, thus far, he'd yet to do something to warrant my mistrust. So why should I treat him differently than anyone else? 

It seemed rather prejudice to be suspicious of him merely because he was a scary face whispering to me from a cave wall. Several people might've had already warned me about him, but maybe they were just prejudice too?

I know, that wasn't the most sound logic. I was just desperate for a knife, and I figured: it was only a level 1 cave, so what's the worse that could happen? 

***

Knock. Knock. Knock.

I knocked my staff against the chest. 

Nothing happened, which was a good sign. 

The chest was right here too, right where the creepy shadow said it would be. I was starting to wonder if shadowy faces with sinister smiles didn't just have a bad rap.

I mean, so far he'd been nothing but entirely honest with me. 

Wondering if I didn't owe him an apology for my earlier apprehension, I bent down to open the chest.

You'll never guess what I found inside.