Loaning Irony

   "I'm going to go on a limb and say that's not name-brand spaghetti," the visitor commented. He had a more mature face and more wrinkles than Francisco.

   "What do you need, Richard?" Francisco put a stop to the small talk. The financial advisor knew Richard personally throughout his entire life. It was a usual occurrence that Richard would come visit just to ask for some money. Francisco, most of the time, lent it with some hesitation. Richard, after all, was his older brother.

   "I just need to borrow..." Richard sucked air through his teeth and squinted his eyes. "...a good amount of money." Francisco shook his head while swallowing the mouthful of cheap pasta. "It's the last time."

   "You said that the last two times," Francisco sighed.

   "Yeah, I know. I just need..." Richard clicked his tongue. "...a 'measly' $5000," he spoke.

   "You said that the last $15,000." Francisco did not skip a beat.

   "Yeah, that is also true. But I really need this. I won't ask you again for money," Richard waved with his hands in an attempt to further his point.

   "No, you need to stop gambling," Francisco calmly declined.

   "I have not gambled in a few months!" Richard snapped. "I would actually bet you that I haven't bet on anything in the last few months because that is a sure win for me, but I won't because I'm done with gambling," he rambled.

   "I'm not lending you anymore money," Francisco groaned.

   "Look, last time, I'm asking. Are you sure you can't give me anything?" Richard bit his thumb.

   "Nope."

   Richard slouched back on his chair and sighed. "Well, I just thought I would ask." The older brother started to look around the room and frowned. "When are you going to stop living like a cheapskate and add some decoration to this place? It needs some feng shui desperately," he chuckled.

   "I don't give you any money and you insult me," Francisco coughed.

   "Don't take it personally. I was going to do that either way," Richard laughed. Francisco rolled his eyes and laughed with him. "You should try coming over sometime for dinner."

   "I'll see when I'm off," Francisco tilted his head. "How are they? Becca and Ophelia?"

   "Becca is fine. She got a job as a cashier at some grocery place. She's actually excited for you to come for dinner. She bugs me because all you eat is dollar-store crap," Richard laughed. Francisco looked down at his spaghetti.

   "Prices went up, so it's now $1.25," Francisco mocked.

  "Whatever, bro. Ophelia..." Richard paused for a moment. Rubbing his neck nervously,  he shook his head. "...yeah, you need to stop hanging with my daughter."

   "What are you talking about?" Francisco squinted his eyes, offended by the remark.

   "She takes after her uncle too much. She's turning into a cheapskate. Ophelia used to love going to the movies. She now fusses and begs me to either wait or take her to the Dollar Movies," Richard moaned, forcing a smile. Something was off.

   Francisco chuckled, remembering the time he did take his niece to the dollar movies. The experience turned out to be incredibly cheap, as he had enough to take her to dinner afterwards. "Yeah, it's a good money-saver, man," Francisco added.

   "Well, now she's lying about your age at restaurants. Last time, she told me 'Hey, Dad. Remember, I'm not 12, I'm under 10 years old, kids 10 years and younger eat free.' What? We were at a fast food place," Richard said with wide eyes.

   "I didn't teach her that," Francisco smiled and laughed.

   "She did not learn it from me," Richard chuckled. "I think she filled up two piggy banks already. It's good that she knows the value of money now because I think she's too young to worry about it so much," Richard rambled.

   "Maybe," Francisco nodded. "But her father is kind of wasteful with his money," he chuckled.

   "You're a mean cheapskate," Richard insulted. Both of the Alvear brothers laughed. The older brother looked at the window and could see it was beginning to rain. "Damn, I got to get going. It's gonna pour hard."

   Richard got up and started walking to the door as Francisco followed him. He quickly handed his older brother an umbrella near the door. "Here, take this," he said.

   "Wow, thanks. I came here for $5,000, and I got this free umbrella instead," Richard chuckled. He hugged his younger brother suddenly. "Love you, bro," he said before opening the exit door.

   "Love you too, Richie," Francisco responded softly.

   "Don't forget about coming by to visit," Richard waved before going down the apartment's stairs. Francisco shut the door and walked over to his window. His eyes kept looking around for Richard's vehicle, but he couldn't find a single car parked on the street. He then watched Richard exit his apartment building with the umbrella. His older brother walked over to a pink bike that was chained to a lamp post.

   Richard put the umbrella through the basket in the front before unchaining the bike. He then pedaled away as Francisco watched him with widened eyes. Francisco wouldn't see his brother again until three weeks later.

   Three Weeks Later...

   Francisco sighed, taking money out of his drawer and handing it to the customer. "Thank you for choosing us. Following customer, next window," he shouted. A co-worker came from the back while putting his name tag on. He noticed Francisco and smugly grinned at him.

   "Whoa, Franky! I never thought they would demote you to the front," he snickered. The smug co-worker usually loved hearing Francisco's cheap stories, laughing at him and not with him. The financial advisor never took it too personally. It could get annoying at times.

   "Wow, you're a lot nicer in the front to customers than you are in your office," the co-worker teased.

   "Hey, you shouldn't talk to him like that. As a financial advisor, he's kind of above you," another co-worker chimed in. A short blonde woman leaned from her window. "You should be nicer to him. Frankie's going to go on vacation afterwards and he's going to tell the manager everything," she threatened. This cordial co-worker's name is Jessica and despite her support, she too tends to tease Francisco about his cheap behavior. Though Francisco always felt it leaned more toward friendly ribbing.  

   "Vacation? Where does a man like Franky go on vacation? Thrift City?" The joking Max asked. 

   "Frankie is going somewhere nice," the blonde woman supported. "Right?"

   "I don't know," Francisco muttered. It was silent before the mocking co-worker shrugged and walked away.

   Francisco concentrated on the line of customers while watching the clock. He wondered exactly what he was going to do for his vacation. Should he do something luxurious or should he stay at home? He can't remember the last time he did something for himself. Looking out behind the windows, he never knew how lively the bank could become.

   The lobby was full of customers. Most were waiting in line, while some were in separate offices talking to other financial consultants. It seemed like a regular, boring day. There was a white noise of conversation bouncing throughout the building.

   This noise was broken as a squad of masked men raced through the door. They were all carrying firearms, waving them around, and shouting. Francisco stood motionless as one of them punched the sole security guard to the ground. The noise level didn't change, but it was more chaotic. A man in a grinning comedy mask jumped on a table.

   "Everyone onto the floor now! We want this to go as smoothly as possible! On your stomachs, put your phones and your wallets in front of you! Act like you got robbed before!" The comedy bank robber shouted.

   A robber wearing a dinosaur mask quickly rushed over to the windows. A single command raced through Francisco's mind: 'Duck.' The financial advisor snapped out of it and grabbed both of his stunned co-workers underneath the windows. Franky could hear the robber banging on the windows repeatedly, ordering them to come out.

   Francisco shared a glance with Jessica, nodding his head to the button that directly signaled the police. The blonde girl shuddered before slowly raising her hand.

   "C'mon, hurry up and press it!" The mean Max whispered in a panic.

   The financial advisor lightly smacked his co-worker's chest. "Go ahead, Jessica. Don't worry. Just press it. We're okay," Francisco stated in a calmer tone. 

   Jessica breathed rapidly as her finger shook. Francisco lifted his head slowly up to peek at the situation. His eyes widened as he dropped his head. The financial advisor couldn't believe his eyes; he knew this situation had changed. He overheard the dinosaur robber coming over to his window, angrily hitting the glass for his attention.

   Glancing over at Jessica, she was incredibly close to the button. Her finger wiggled from fright. Francisco lightly grabbed her hand and shook his head. "Don't press the button," he advised.

   "What!? Why wouldn't she press the button? They can't get us in here," the co-worker said with his teeth clenched.

   Francisco blinked before sighing. "...They have hostages. Let's just do as they say." He commented before quickly standing up. The two co-workers stared as he rushed over to open the metallic, heavy door, separating the lobby and back area of the bank.

   "Oh, screw this!" Max crawled fast to the button. The dinosaur robber shouldered Francisco and started pointing his gun at the bank tellers.

   "Don't move," the dinosaur robber shouted in a scruffy voice.

   Francisco raised both of his hands as two other robbers came over to him. They forced him to kneel in the middle of the lobby, tying his hands behind his back with a ziptie. The financial advisor's blood boiled with anger. He could see that the bank robbers were serious about harming some of the customers if the employees didn't cooperate. He honestly didn't care about that. He counted five men at first until a shy sixth man emerged last from the door. This is what told him not to push that damn button.

   The sixth man was wearing a clown mask. He looked around sheepishly and was holding his firearm tightly. The eyes in his mask met Francisco's. Franky held eye contact, staring at the same hazel eyes. He knew that oversized stain hoodie anywhere. All his older brother could do was look down and shrug his shoulders in his goofy clown mask.