Musings - alone and together

Again I was left with my own thoughts, cooking another meal. The battle, better call it a slaughter, has shaken me deeply. Illyára looked like a sweet girl to me, with her white, silken hair, porcelain skin, a beautiful voice and a friendly attitude towards me, but there was a ruthlessness under that beautiful exterior that made me think. Not once had she hesitated to kill the attacking dragons. She hadn’t even considered hiding or evading the onslaught in any way. That didn’t sit well with me, despite knowing the necessity of self-defense of course. If you have magic at your disposal, why not just anesthetize your opponent or put him in some other way to sleep? Preferably not permanently…

And it wasn’t just Illyára. Al’Reeza also didn’t hesitate when attacking, nor did the dragons. And Lily seemed quite hostile on her own. I just couldn't see any trust, understanding, or even the slightest attempt to build a mutual understanding between the two parties. There was just pure, blank, unabated hostility.

Still, I was dependent on the girls if I wanted to reach inhabited, cultivated land. In no way could I cross the vast ice deserts of Skîbæria on my own. Even so, there would be more wilderness before the kingdom of Tóràbun, according to Illyára the northernmost land inhabited by humans. And I didn’t know anything about the native fauna and flora or about the dangers they posed.

That was one of the reasons why I still cooked and prepared a meal for people who seemed - partly at least - suspicious to me.

On the other hand, they had a different side too. Al-Reeza had apologized to me and Illyára had healed me, a complete stranger, who at least from Lily's perspective was more of a burden to them.

Also, I was really curious and …intrigued! My contact with the girls was the first human contact with other species of similar intelligence. To be fair, they seemed quite similar to humans, even if they would raise some eyebrows on good ol’ mother earth.

Still I was wondering: Not only did a whole other world bring forth incredibly human-like species in an environment that wasn’t all too hostile to humans from earth, they matched the figures from our folklore, mythology and fantasy in an uncanny way! How was that possible in a world that lacked any connection to earth?

Wait a moment! In some mysterious way I was transported here, so there had to be a connection between our worlds, even if it eluded me at the moment (and the girls too it seemed).

These and similar thoughts tore again at my perception of reality. There were moments when I looked at my hands, going through the motions of preparing the meal, where they felt completely alien to me. Like they didn't really belong to me.

Some part of me still denied that I was here on another world in a lava cave near the north pole, preparing food for two demi-girls. That part wanted to be in a well known environment, on earth, without dragons and without the danger of starvation or other means to come to a sudden and/or violent death.

Still, going through the motions of cooking helped me to concentrate on the here and now. It had been necessary not only to feel the force of the higher gravity, but also to measure it, to calculate the implications, to understand it intellectually, not just emotionally. It helped me to focus, to concentrate my thoughts, and not to lose myself in the feeling of being lost.

Al’Reeza and Lily arrived shortly before the rice was ready. Both inhaled deeply and sniffed the air, tasting the unfamiliar odors in the air.

“That's wonderful!” exclaimed Al’Reeza, while Lily growled: “Where’s the meat?”

Both stood over the pan, eying its content, Al’Reeza enthusiastically, Lily suspiciously.

“Sorry, I have no meat with me.” I replied.

The beast girl bared her teeth in a mocking parody of a smile.

“What?! Are you a herbivore?”

“I’m a vegetarian. I don’t eat meat from land animals.” I replied again, this time more guarded. I was aware that this attitude couldn’t be very popular among adventurers.

And indeed, Lily burst into a loud, bellowing laughter (a frightening sight, I’m telling you!) and Al’Reeza felt inclined to step in.

“Be nice! Not everyone shares your predatory inclination!”

The beastess broke her laughter and sneered at her companion.

“What?! You don’t take this attitude seriously, do you?”

The daimon girl shrugged nonchalantly.

“You can’t be picky under these circumstances. If it’s good - and it smells heavenly! - only a fool would reject it!”

The beast girl was at a loss of words and I checked on the rice, barely suppressing a smile. Al’Reeza slid over and eyed the rice cooker.

“What is that?” she asked curiously.

I tried to explain it to her, but it basically came down to ‘technology that looks and works like magic’. Specifically the notion of ‘programming’ was alien to her, since magic worked much more directly linked to the spirit and mind of its caster, as she explained to me.

“You just tell the mana what to do, how to shape or how to impact, and of course you have to provide enough energy.” she said.

“Since mana is everywhere, in you, but also in your surroundings - albeit in varying concentrations - it mainly comes down to your mind. To what degree can you mentally connect to it? To what extent can you manipulate it? How efficiently can you do it? And so on.”

“But can't you, I don’t know, ‘store’ or preserve your will or command in some kind of device that will execute the magic working without you concentrating on it?” I asked.

She shook her head.

“No, not as far as I know. Mana reacts only to living beings and to their minds and spirits. Yes, there were some experiments to infuse an easy command into crystals from as pure as possible manærite, but to my knowledge not successfully. You just can’t store mental energy and its content in manærite or other physical matter.”

“And yet our brain is in some kind the source of mind, spirit, soul, intellect, you name it.” I interjected. “So there has to be an interface between the realm of the physical and the realm of the spiritual.”

Al’Reeza shook her head, but admitted: “Yes, I agree. But only in living organisms, not technical devices or other matter. Or is that different in your world?”

“No,” I also had to admit. “But technical advances are progressing so rapidly that in a few decades, maybe less, it might be possible for computer programs to become self aware.”

Both girls shot me a very strange look. Lily just shook her head, and Al'Reeza commented: “That sounds really frightening to me. No, it sounds apocalyptic! Doesn’t anybody fear the outcome of such development?”

I shrugged and said: “Nobody knows if it’ll really come to that. And nobody knows what will happen after. But most people just don’t care. They use their devices to their utmost convenience and pleasure and don’t think much further.”

Lily snorted, seemingly amused.

“Sounds familiar to me!”

At that moment the cooker signaled that the rice was ready. I mixed everything together in the pan, put some of it on the plate that I and Illyára had already used (Al’Reeza also didn’t mind), and offered the rest in the pan to Lily, who took it with a quiet grumble. Fortunately I had some spare spoons, so they didn’t need to eat with their hands (or use already used spoons). Although I was nearly certain that after two years in the wild they might not have protested even about that. But you never know…

Al’Reeza praised the meal almost as much as Illyára, and Lily, despite not saying anything, practically inhaled the unfamiliar food after a bit of initial apprehension with a vigour that indicated either imminent starvation or great approval. Maybe both.

After the girls had cleared their plate and pan, Al’Reeza got a serious look and said to me:

“Thank you very much for this most delightful meal! But now we have to make plans to get out of here undetected and as fast as possible. And we have to clear about seven thousand miles of ice covered plains.”

I nearly choked. Seven thousand miles! That was close to the diameter of planet earth!

Good heavens!