Not alone, surrounded

On my way home, I recalled that my mother had told me that she would return for dinner. Honestly, I was feeling a bit hungry because I had given what should have been my lunch to a random little girl that I had run into.

Thus, I decided to stop by the tavern that we had gone to yesterday to see if she was inside.

Unsurprisingly, the tavern was just as bustling as it had been the previous night. Plenty of drunk adventurers having a good time were crowding the place. I caught a couple glances as I walked in but thought nothing of it.

Surprisingly, my mother actually was there. She was surrounded by a strange group of people and discussing something with them energetically. Noticing me out of the corner of her eye, she waved at me from across the room. Naturally, I walked over.

Mother: Everyone, this is my son Adam.

A huge fat guy, a cat beastwoman, and a muscular short dude sat at the table. The maid that was with my mother yesterday was missing.

Three other people besides my mother and I were sitting at the table. The first was a large man wearing armor made out of monster leather. Though he was sitting down, I could tell that he was at least seven feet tall. Sitting next to him was a cat beastwoman with black fur on her wrists and legs. She wore a rather revealing outfit for some reason and looked at me as if she were appraising me. The last was a burly short man with a beard that reached his chest. He was also wearing a horned helmet and a dark cloak.

???: So you’re the product of Martha’s elopement. It’s nice to meet you, I’m Oliver.

The fat guy spoke first. Though his words weren’t the kindest, it felt more like playful teasing rather than malice. Of course, his voice was deep and gruff so it didn’t feel that funny.

As the other two introduced themselves, my mother ordered some food for me. The catwoman’s name was Mau and the short dude was named Rock.

Mother: I used to adventure with these people back before I’d met your father.

Mau: We were unstoppable back then ~Nya.

Is she doing that unironically?

Rock: Yes… A shame we couldn’t meet under better circumstances.

…

The conversation paused for a moment as we were all reminded of the circumstances that had led us here.

Ah, time to face reality.

“Mother”: Adam… I’m sorry for having left you alone at a time like this… I know this must be hard for you…

That’s right. This six year old just lost his father, his home, and almost everything he knows and loves. Would a normal kid of this age even be able to process what is going on?

“Mother”: …I’ll tell it to you straight, Adam. Your father, Ash and the fifteen other maids, and the 20 soldiers protecting the estate are all… they have all passed on…

She paused for a moment to gauge my reaction. I had already known all this information, but to hear it said directly like this… It was like being smacked in the face with fifty bricks.

I could say nothing and do nothing but look down at my feet.

Mother: You, me, and my personal maid Alyssa are the only ones… the only ones still here.

He voice broke for a second, but she regained composure and continued.

Mother: We don’t have much money, so we will be living with Oliver and Mau for a little while. I’ll be adventuring with these guys to make some money for us. Okay? Don’t worry, everything will be okay.

With that, she embraced me and we sat in silence with the others at the table simply staring at us solemnly. Eventually, the silence was disrupted when the waitress brought over the food.

Waitress: One Chicken Caprese?

Mother: Over here

She set the plate in front of me and I just stared at it in silence… Chicken, huh?

As I stared at the water vapor rising from the chicken, I thought about if there was a metaphor here… No, I’m just…

I’m not…

What happened…

I’m not hungry…

Rock: Kid, you’ll need to be strong from now on. To protect yourself and your mother you need strength… I’ll teach you all there is to know about the sword if you’d like.

YOU WANT TO REPLACE ASH? JUST LIKE THAT?

I clenched my fists in anger at the idea for a moment, before breathing out and calming down.

What a stupid and useless thought… I really need to keep it together.

Without answering Rock, I returned to my chicken and started eating. I still didn’t feel hungry, in fact I was feeling more and more sick as the seconds went by, but I felt like I had to leave this place urgently.

I shoved the meat down my throat while resisting the urge to vomit it all back out. Then I took a swig of water to quench my dry throat and stood up.

Pax: Thank you. I’m going back to the inn.

“Mother”: Adam…

She grabbed my hand looked at me as if she wanted to say something. Then, after a moment passed, she let go and turned back to the table.

I walked away without looking back

---------------

Adam: I’m home

No answer came from the empty house, not that the boy expected otherwise. He calmly stepped inside, slipped out of his shoes, and continued inward. The boy walked towards his bed, but something felt off. He felt as if his movements were robotic, and the room suffocating.

Adam: It’s quiet

For the first time all day long, there was nothing distracting the boy from his own thoughts, nothing inhibiting his darkest fantasies to play in his head, and nothing stopping her from appearing.

???: Had fun today didn’t yo~u?

As always, she had appeared from somewhere out of his sight. This time it was directly behind him on the bed. Her scent hit him like a truck and he leaned into her in response to her voice.

???: You’ve been running all day so why don’t you rest a little bit Pax? —Or is it actually Adam?

As the boy rested his head on her laps, he was thrown for a loop by the question being asked. Staring into the woman’s smiling face, he became distracted by useless thoughts.

???: I… I don’t know. Tell me. What is the right thing to be doing right now?

???: Hmmmm. Well even if you say that, I can’t just decide everything for you can I? In this case though it’s obvious isn’t it? Pax died already. You were there. You were the one who killed him. He died sadly, pathetically, stupidly, weakly, and completely alone. Ri~ght? Don’t tell me you regret it?

The boy could do nothing but stare in shock at the woman’s face, his mouth opening and closing without saying a word. However, his eyes were a different story. In those eyes too many conflicting statements were being said but the woman still understood them somehow: Don’t say mean words to me. Punish me. I do regret it. I would do it again. Love me. Leave me alone. Kiss me. Choke me. Fuck me. Kill me.

Smiling at the boy, the woman patted his head while she soothed him with her words.

???: Don’t worry, everything will be alright. You just need to sit here, do nothing, and cry. Nothing more. You’ve gotten pretty good at that these past few days haven’t you?

And so, the boy keenly followed the woman’s directions. He didn’t know why, but he wasn’t told to think about that.

And so, the sheets were once again moistened with the boy’s tears.