A New Day

It’s pitch black.

I didn’t make it to that eternal place?

Of course not, I wasn’t the warrior you wanted me to become.

Father…I’m sorry.

"Hmm..maybe a little..more...time..."

Voices? That’s not mine, sounds like a man’s voice.

Wait, am I really dead? If so, who’s voice is that?

Painfully I opened my eyes, I could see an adult man glancing over me.

“F-father?”

My voice came out cracked, barely a whisper.

A figure of a man leaned in.

“No, not quite,” he said gently. “But you’re safe.”

It’s so blurry, where am I even?

Did I fall asleep? What am I lying on, it’s comfortable.

I started rubbing my eyes with my hand.

After I stopped I could make out what was in front of me.

A man with blond hair, loosely tied back with a few strands falling around his face.

He looked young, maybe early thirties, but his eyes…his eyes looked worn.

Wearing layered robes with a shoulder guard on his right shoulder? Is he a warrior?

Who is this man?

The man had a cup of water in his hand, it reached towards me.

“Please take a sip, you must feel worn out right?.” said the man.

Slowly I lifted myself, my body was aching but I was careful not to make any erratic movement.

The surface beneath me started to shift slightly.

…A bed?

I haven't been on a bed since I was little. The last time was with my mother.

My hand twitched as I reached out to grab the cup. Almost there.

Then—

“Don’t trust anyone, Seyren.”

A voice. Deep, commanding. Father’s voice.

Don’t trust them, get away.

Instinct kicked in, I attempted to push myself backwards with my arms, pressing against the bed to escape.

“Agh!”

A sharp pain was erupting from my shoulder, I gasped for air.

Before I could move, the man I saw suddenly reached for me, his hand pressing firmly against my painful shoulder.

I braced myself as he tried to swing—H-huh? What is he doing?

The man wrapped his arms around me tightly, but not in an aggressive way. It feels oddly warm.

“Please try to stay calm. You have no need to be worried.” the man said in a gentle voice.

At first I tried to move, but after those words I decided to let my attempt at escape go.

Why? Why do I feel relieved? Fath—He’s no longer here…

Is it okay to feel like this?

I don’t know, but what choice do I really have? My body aches…if I tried to escape I wouldn’t go far.

I hesitantly nodded in agreement.

After a moment the man backed away.

If there’s a sign of danger…I’ll leave this place.

To where though? I can’t go home. I don’t even know where home is.

What can I d—

The man reached out his hand again, still offering the cup of water.

I hesitantly grabbed the water and pondered for a moment.

T-this is safe to drink right? I mean it looks like water…maybe I shouldn—

The man grabbed the cup from my hand and took a sip.

“Ah, refreshing! Sorry I was a bit thirsty myself, here you can have the rest.”

He drank the water? I guess it must be safe for me too, right?

I grabbed the cup again and took a large gulp.

Ahhh, it is refreshing…

“Knew you’d be thirsty, would you like another one?” said the man.

I nodded.

After a while I finally learnt the name of this man, Jinsei.

He briefly explained how he found me, and it seems he healed some of my urgent injuries.

It was a tall fall, I’m surprised I didn’t die.

During his explanation, I felt an uneasy presence just outside the room…

There must be someone else in the house right?

Jinsei turned around and faced towards me.

Then he asked me a question.

“Do you remember your name?” he asked gently.

I opened my mouth, but nothing came out at first.

I swallowed.

“…S-seyren.”

“I’m glad you’re awake, Seyren…”

Glad? Why would he be glad, he doesn’t even know him.

The door started to creek.

A young girl appeared through the door, her black hair falling neatly past her shoulders, streaked with purple highlights. Maybe she’s the same age as me? She looks around ten.

She purposely avoids eye contact, almost like she was scared? Did I do something to her?

“Hotaru, everything alright?” asked Jinsei.

“Why are we helping out a Narien! You know it's a bad omen for mama!” shouted Hotaru.

N-Narien? That’s not my name, is she confusing me with someone else?

“Hotaru, we’ve already discussed this before. This child needed help, don’t judge him in a negative light just because of a silly book.” said Jinsei in a calm voice.

“Because of a silly book? It’s not a silly book! I could call your book silly and—”

“Stop it, Hotaru!” shouted Jinsei.

Hotaru flinched, she seemed to be in distress for a moment, but suddenly her cheeks puffed and while looking away from her father.

Jinsei’s presence suddenly changed…what book are they both on about?

“Hmph! Well I’m going to study now if that’s fine with you.”

Hotaru stormed off to the room next door while leaving our door open.

Jinsei sighed.

“Sorry if that spooked you, Seyren. Raising kids isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, huh?”

“It’s fine, that’s how all kids are raised right?”

“U-Uh, I mean, that’s not necessarily true! R-Right? You must be missing your parents about now, yeah?”

Parents…

I didn’t answer.

The silence lingered for a while.

Suddenly I noticed Hotaru peeking into the room.

Was she listening the whole time?

Hotaru glanced back at me.

“You don’t have parents?” she asked, her voice calm this time.

I shook my head slowly.

“What happened to the—”

“Hotaru.” Jinsei cut in while shaking his head.

What happened, huh?

That dark room. It was filled with blood, the look at my father’s face…I didn’t mean to leave you there…I was being chased. I panicked, I didn’t know what to do, but survive like you always taught me right?

The cup from my hand slipped, water spilling onto the bed sheet.

I flinched back.

W-why has the water turned red?

I stared deeply at it while my heart was pounding vigorously.

That’s not water…It’s blood.

Could that be Fathers…Why was I holding onto that!

Make it go away please!

I pressed my hands over my eyes.

I’m sorry! I’m sorry!

I don’t want to see it anymore! My stomach is twisting, I can’t stand it…I feel sick.

Father deserves to live, not me! I’m a monster who couldn’t remember how my father was killed. Nor did I stay to bury him…a failure as a warrior and a son…

I wish I had never been born.

Hotaru was still standing at the doorway, looking at the spilled mess on the bed, dripping onto the floor..

“Tch...really you can’t even hold a cup properly?," she muttered, arms crossed. “And you’re supposed to be a Narien?”

That word again, why does she keep saying that?

Nairen.

That specific word uttered a harsh tone.

“I’m not a Narien.”

Hotaru’s eyes narrowed. “Liar. You’ve got the hair. The eyes. You look like one. I don’t even know how you managed to su—”

“That’s enough Hotaru, we can all discuss that another day,” said Jinsei.

She took one step forward, ignoring her father’s comment. “You know what they say, right? Nariens bring misfortune. It’s a risk to Mama. No, to everyone to have you here.”

My hands slowly lifted from covering my eyes.

I’m a misfortune…?

Before she could continue, Jinsei spoke.

“Hotaru. That’s enough.”

She turned her head toward him slowly, her mouth still half-open.

“You’ve said quite a lot, don’t you think it’s time for you to focus on your studies?”

His tone wasn’t angry like before. It was a tone of disappointment.

Hotaru’s expression shifted, she turned and walked off.

After she left the room went silent.

Am I really safe here? Is this my sign to leave?

It’s my fault they’re arguing in the first place.

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?” Jinsei tilted his head slightly in confusion. “You haven’t done anything wrong, Seyren. If anything I should apologize to you for that scene.”

“But you are arguing about me right? So if I wasn’t here, there’d be no issue right?”

Jinsei let out a soft chuckle and waved his hand. “Seyren, listen, when people care for each other, they’ll eventually barge heads and disagree sometimes. Sometimes these things are a reminder that others still care, just in their own unique way.”

I scratched my head, “So you aren’t angry about that? You really don’t mind it?”

“Mhm, that’s right. No point harboring feelings for these types of things, it’s better to let go and accept it. As time passes it makes us forget about such trivial things.”

Let go and accept it? Why doesn’t he feel pressured to change things now?

“Why don’t you try to change these things urgently?”

“Everyone needs some time to get adjusted. That goes with you too, you know. I can tell you're a bit anxious, probably have a ton of questions. Yet, maybe it’s better to take a rest and we can talk more tomorrow.”

Huh, he’s noticed me feeling anxious? Then again I kind of dropped that cup of—water. Where did that blood go? It was there just a moment ago, why has it turned to water?

“Oh right, haha! I guess you can’t really rest in a wet bed. Don’t mind me for a moment, I’ll go grab new bed sheets for you. Will be back in a moment.”

Jinsei dashed out the door. He’s quite fast…though now I’m left wondering why has the urge to leave vanished?

I know I can’t trust him, but I can’t help but feel that maybe it’s okay to let my guard down a bit.