Chapter 3: The Winter Boy

"The painter has the universe in his mind and hands."

-Vincent Van Gogh

***

Giggles.

The giggles of a child filled the floral Spring air near the riverbed. Butterflies danced around like fairies, blessing the girl with shimmers of dust. She smelled each flower with a smile that could replace the sun. But upon the arrival of a man clad in black, the monarchs fled to the thicket.

“Walter!” Kimberlain rushed to embrace his coat, but he raised a palm to stop her. In her hand were bundled stems of bluish flowers with oval leaves. “Look! Forget-me-nots! They smell so good, look!”

Walter took the flower to his face as if to sniff before he chucked it away. Deadpan as always, he replied.

“Really? And where did you learn this?”

“There’s books-“

“Are. There are.”

“… There’re books in our libraries called ‘almanacs,’ and one of them have paintings of Germania’s flora and fauna!”

“Flora and fauna… I never taught you those words.”

“That’s how it called animals and plants- I mean, plants and animals, since I said flora and fauna. Come! There’re so many more types of flowers!”

As she wandered around the field of flowers, the dream ended. Kimberlain's eyes opened in her tent. Yesterday returned in flashes.

The smell of pine, the forbidden book, a cold Walter. Hmph. While he did treat her wounds, it was too little, too late. He left me. She hadn't forgotten. Kim's silent treatment had stretched on since he retrieved her from the near-death incident. The image was still fresh.

Gaping maw, pouncing death: to think she stared both just yesterday and lived to paint the picture. A frightening relief. Of course I'd beat the wolf, it wasn't even close! Her cheeks barely contained a smile. Speaking of smiles…

The Winter Boy. For the first time in forever, an actual person. Not imprisoned in wood frames, not a vase or a stone bust. Someone who breathed, someone who'd respond and smile back. I knew it.

Walter kept secrets for her good—that, she understood. It's Walter, and while her anger had yet to subside, she loved him. But he gets old, that awkward stick, and it wouldn’t hurt to venture outside the mountains a little bit, see what’s there, meet a few people. After all, Walter was strong, the strongest there was. What is stopping him? What more does he want?

The lazy doors groaned and cast both light and shadow. Speak of the devil. "Kimberlain."

Walter. She remained facing away. There was a glimpse of the old him in his voice. It proved the power of silence, her silence. She should do it more often, Kim figured. He bent slow, so stiff you'd expect creaking.

"You… didn't sleep, did you?"

She slept all day. After all, that was all there was to be done. The bandages made movement a difficult chore, but it had never been about the hour. She wanted that stupid smile gone, replaced with the deepest frown imaginable. She desired his begging, or better yet, his groveling, complete with a fat chocolate cake that pushed against the ceiling. If that couldn't happen, then nothing would.

Walter retracted. "Did you see someone? Anyone?"

"…"

"You're stupid."

… I want to punch him.

"You took the ring off."

Yeah, so what?

"You almost died."

Because you left me.

"… Dear."

Right. He used to call her that all the time. How long had it been? It felt nice. Almost enough to answer back. Almost.

"I have cake."

"…"

"Chocolate."

Almost there.

"Well done, my dear. Good job. I'm proud."

Lips trembled. Eyes blinked rapidly. It must've been debris or Atr trickery or... something. Be a champion, Kimberlain, be a champion. She muttered her mantra but once she faced Walter, the tears wouldn't stop. Immediately she stood and walked then buried her face in his coat. Some champion she was. Kimberlain, the slobbering mess. Kimberlain, the crybaby.

"I hate you. You left me. I was so scared. You used to sleep beside me. Read me stories-"

The list flowed like a tumbling scroll. Walter was silent throughout. His stroking of her head tightened her embrace with each brush. If God ever stopped hiding to give her one wish, any wish, she'd ask to encase the moment in gold. Frozen, yet warm. Happy, tearful. Endless.

Embracing each other until the end of time.

Sobs settled and Walter pushed her as one would push glass. His voice was a warm cup of cocoa. "Never take it off again, understood?"

She nodded without looking. His hands rested on her shoulders. "Dear, did you see someone? Anyone? It is important."

Kimberlain stared blankly at his feet. He left as soon as I saw him. I remember… his silver hair. His white clothes, like his smile and skin. His… I didn't see his face.

Kim couldn't match his gaze. "What are you saying? It's just us here." She nestled into his coat once more.

***

"GRAH!" The girl lunged, sword in hand once more. Another tireless bout in the forest. The pines begged to sigh.

Walter received the strike as expected. "It's been a week. Still mad?"

As if she heard nothing, Kim released an onslaught of strikes. Add-jumble-repeat—The rhythm was the same as it had ever been. And yet, Walter was launched a fair distance back. He inspected his hands—trembling.

"Very." Kim tightened her grip. I'm not mad that you left me anymore… But I still remember the stupid book. And you won't give me answers. When I ask, you deflect them. And most of all…

"You made me train with injuries! Those weights were heavy! Your sorry's not gonna cut it!"

Again, time lagged behind save for the two. Leaves, branches, sword, spinning at Walter's right. His rod intercepts-

A fluke. Walter turned left… the ring? She threw it-

THUMP! Fist from above, rattled him. A shockwave shook the forest back to present. For the first time, a clean hit. For the first time, he was on his knees. After dusting himself, he stood up unscathed and applauding. Still annoying, but not as much at least.

"Well done. You immediately implemented the tactics I’ve taught you.”

That was a bit easy… oh well, whatever. She shrugged and tried to be smug, but her grin was a little too wide.

“However, there are still improvements to be made. First, your control is still sloppy. I’ve told you many times before that you can concentrate Atr to certain points in your body. To do this, you need to…”

And off he went with a tedious paragraph that entered one ear and out the other. Yeah, I’m not listening to that. Victory at last and it wasn't against a stone bust. The urge to paint came to her. She waited for Walter to finish.

“Do you understand what I just said?”

"I sure did, haha. Since I won… can I get a break?"

"No."

"Just one day? I want to go to our river again."

"No."

"But… but why?!"

"That was only the surface."

That was only the basics? "Please? I've finally won against you! And I'll feel less mad if you give me a break. Pretty please?"

"… Fine."

"YAY!" She jumped around like a bunny that drank coffee.

"This will be the last one. This month will be a busy month. And before you go… let me show you what we will work on next."

"…?"

Walter opened his right palm. He pointed it at Kim. Afterwards, something shot forth. It was dark, it was fast, and it enveloped her vicinity. Whatever came at her, she was left to ponder back in her tent. But it didn't matter. Her smile was too wide.

***

Other than sticking out like a sore thumb—the giant, dilapidated mansion in the forest had little to its name. Every room drew the same picture: cobwebs clinging to corners, holes yawning in the floor, furniture sagging under its own weight. Windows, dusted and fractured by time and weather, let in slivers of moonlight through their wounds. The sorry place leaned ever so slightly, as though tired of offering nothing but ruin. Whatever it had been, the nightly crickets agreed it was pointless to consider.

The roof, though. Now that was worth every stroke of paint. Rotten worse than any other part of the mansion, sure, but the view was breathtaking. A black canvas spread above where countless stars shimmered and scattered in and beyond a purple-pink cloud that bloomed like oil spilled in water. A piece of it lived in Kimberlain's right pupil, ready to be captured on her rectangular slate. She sat where the roof had flattened against the slope, one of the bigger scars near the eaves. Painting was one of life's greatest pleasures, especially in these colorless hours.

But Kim painted not a single star on her canvas. In the easel was The Winter Boy, whose glow faintly contrasted the dark background. And to honor the sky, she used fireflies as pigment.

Kim's lasting tradition—painting before Walter called to sleep—embarrassed the ancient dwelling. Behind her, works of nights past peeked under thickening snow. Some were there just to lay; others were scabs of the injured roof. Compared to them, this one… there was no mistaking it. Her beam, mirroring her art's, affirmed what she already thought. This is the best piece so far.

Although, something was missing… his face. She could imagine his features, but the piece itself warned against it. This past week, all she did was recall how he looked. Walter was openly annoyed. Never asked questions, though. He can't do anything about it because I was obedient.

The brush's hard end poked her puffed cheek over and over until she popped it in frustration. Maybe, just maybe, the wish to stop time was cheap in retrospect. That's a joke. I know you don't like them. Sorry, Walter… and sorry for hiding him from you. But why did she?

knock-knock-knock.

"Kimberlain."

A question for another night.

"Coming!" Time to sleep, I guess.

The crickets stopped as she wrapped up her easel. In the distance below, a warm bluish glow of antlers caught her attention. Animals rarely approached their home, except for insects. She looked back at the dormer window, he can wait a while, then fell from the roof to the ground without plopping. Cautiously, she approached the two-legged deer.

"It's you again." She greeted, then turned at its hooves. "… It must be hard, even when you make it look easy. And I learned from you. Thanks."

"You're very welcome."

Kimberlain's eyes narrowed. Can Atr make animals talk? After a brief scan, they widened. Behind the doe stood a figure in white robes, skin pale as his clothes, short silver hair waving like brushstrokes in the wind. When the moon peered at his bang-covered face, only his smile showed through—genuine in a way Walter's never was. Meanwhile, Kim's mouth was stuck shaping words that never came.

"Are you alright?" His giggles made her heart flutter for even they were angelic. "Can you talk?"

"I… I…"

And she would remain in that state if she wasn't dragged behind a tree. The mansion doors creaked open and Walter emerged from the darkness within. With methodical pace, he swept the area like a lazy predator. Meanwhile, Kim was engrossed in her close proximity with the Winter Boy.

Walter, he smells good! Like Spring! She would announce, but the moment weighed more.

Walter called out. "You're behind the tree, Kimberlain. Go back inside. It's time to sleep."

This stupid ring. She sighed and revealed herself.

"I was just gathering more fireflies for tomorrow. It's my break, right? I'll paint during the day for once. I'm thinking of… the sunrise! Right below the frozen lake so there's a reflection!"

"Not the river?"

"That gets old!"

"… Come. Sleep early so you can catch it."

And she waded toward him. As her footsteps found their rhythm, her mind drifted back in time, to their parting conversation.

"Go to the frozen lake when you can."

"You mean the one near the river?"

"Yes. My friends and I will be there. My group feels crowded, but I am more than happy to add one more."

***

The hall of adventures was ignored for once. Joyous, it would feel, but the walls were cold and the pathway was empty. Ivan, Germaine, Mr. and Mrs Gott—they all agreed there was nothing to feel. After all, they were inanimate. Meanwhile, not a wink of sleep in the giddy girl, not after last night. She had to revisit the vast Outside, through pages she'd lost sleep to yet again. Nothing tops a nap as she’d been told, but as though she’d learned nothing, it had been pre-dawn when she reached her final page, when the questions started flooding.

Breakfast was taken early and her bath was without complaint despite the biting frost. She bid Walter farewell with the biggest smile on her face—

"Wait." Walter said. "Where is your ring?"

"Oh, you're right! It’s… wait, didn’t I throw it at you-"

Walter chucked the ring for her to catch. "Return before lunch."

Kim sighed. "I will, I will."

As soon as the doors opened, she dashed outside the mansion and into the dim forest. Though the sun had yet to rise, the pines radiated cheers for her and the snow made way. It was flashing, winks from the clouds that had been bellowing for days on end.

What's a carriage? What's a 'tea'? Who's a father and why don't I have any? I have so many things to ask…

A murder of crows fled from where she came. To them, it was a day like any other. To Kimberlain, it was a race. The girl stood no chance… until Atr tipped the scales. She passed them in no time. She ran and ran and she never stopped.

The frozen river stretched ahead, a white ribbon of ice winding through the snow. Unlike the landscape of loose snow, every step taken carried happy memories. Come spring, the banks showed off their breadth of flowers. They were perfect for making crowns. Summer was when the grass grew tall, the shrubs thickened, and Walter hid. I never found him except his crow, she chuckled.

Autumn held her favorite palette, and though the pines would remain evergreen, the smaller deciduous trees would adopt her hair's hue, and since the river sat past the pines, it was orange and red everywhere she'd looked. Just then, a certain painting appeared in her mind. Maybe my judgment last night was too in-the-moment. But now it was Winter. Only dead trees with bare branches in a frozen graveyard. She inched across the slippery ice, her expressions bittersweet. A couple more steps led to the lake.

"Was I too early?" Kimberlain looked around, voice echoing off the trees. "Hello?"

Nothing. Until…

"Hello!"

A string of gold streaked past her, and Kim’s eyes followed it to a blonde whose hair curled like spun sunlight. Her eyes matched the gold of her bright and fluffy hair, and they sparkled at the girl with curious glints.

"I'm Sonn Sehnsucht! Nice to meet you!" Kim's hand was shaken vehemently. "You're so cuuute! Oh my gosh, look at that hair! It's gorgeous and straight and fiery, unlike mine! I'm so jealous! We already have twins here, but they're busy somewhere… can we replace them?"

It was the first time Kim saw a proper adult. She looked at Sonn, really looked. Her chest felt… tight, yet she moved so freely, so confidently. How does she even breathe! Will I look like that when I get older? On top of that, Kim wasn't used to being the least chatty in the room. Needless to say, she didn't dislike Sonn. As the one-sided conversation stretched on, Kim saw a person leaning on a tree.

Away from them stood a man… or another woman? Kim couldn't tell and it showed. He was tall, Walter was much taller, but still tall nonetheless. She was thankful that he seemed rather silent and easy to talk to and so she approached with that intention. Her expectations were promptly dismantled.

"I'm a man." Kim mistook him for a mind-reader. The man shook his head, hair swaying like a red mare’s. "God, I hate kids. Why do we have to do this again?"

Kimberlain pouted. Why does he hate me? She'd have sulked behind a tree if the ground hadn't rumbled slightly.

From behind her appeared a chiseled face with every reason to show off. Glistening despite the sleeping sun, he was a striding arrangement of bare muscle whose shoulders swayed with each step. How could he dress so little in winter?

He announced like he owned the world, "Bella Faust, your pride cannot handle that your allure is denied by the pure! Fear not, young one, for this lad's tongue knows nothing but emptiness. Take to heart not his words, but the only beautiful thing about him. His face."

Bella gasped at the insult. "My qualities are reserved for the ladies, not annoying children! And can you shut the fuck up, Kraftberg?!"

"Only refer to me by my full modesty, Kraftberg Stolzberg!" The hunk's chest twitched alternately, much like how she plays with her brows on the mirror.

"BAH!" Bella drew more distance.

Are they… are they fighting because of me? Kim's eyes sank. She figured a step-back would give her some space to think, but she stumbled on a leg instead. Beneath her was a person she failed to notice earlier.

"Gosh, they're all so loud. Oh, hey there, can we not sit on my leg? I want to sleep."

‘Cold ground’ and ‘sleep’ were two things she’d never put together, but then again, everyone thus far made no sense either. She shrugged and obeyed.

"Yes. Sorry." This one seems friendly. "… d-do you have a name?"

"I'm… I am…” His eyes fluttered closed. “zzz…” Then almost popped out of his sockets. “ACK!"

Sonn jumped on his stomach. He curled like an infant. "Good morning Castro! This guy's name is Castro Schwer~ Oops~”

"SONN! COME HERE!"

“Catch me if you can!”

Kim watched, wide-eyed, as the two ran laps around the forest—one yelling, one laughing. Castro wasn't friendly after all, and that made her sigh.

At this point, something had come to Kim's attention. Everyone is an adult, and they have second names. What should mine be? There were no crickets this time, but no answers either. She came to them with a handful of questions, and now she figured she'd leave with a pile. Were they as she had hoped? No. They could've been better, she wasn't sure how. Did she like them? Another uncertainty. However, no matter how unexpected they were, the answer certainly wasn't 'no'.

Returning her gaze to the group, she found them silent. Suddenly ordered. Kim mimicked them first before asking more questions. Fortunately, it seemed that she could keep these ones off the pile.

"Welcome." The Winter Boy descended from his packed steed. "I see that you have met my peers already. Were they kind to you?"

"Yeah. I think." She said, eyeing Bella from the side, who glared at her.

"Great! Can you introduce yourself to us?"

The girl's stomach fluttered. She faced the odd crowd, then nodded quickly and never looked up. She took a deep breath; longer than any breath she'd ever taken. With an exhale just as lengthy, she raised her head.

"My name… is Kimberlain! What an awkward name, you might think, but it's mine! If awkward is the topic, then good ol' Walter's got you covered. He's not the friendliest-looking out here nor is he fond of speaking, but I can assure you that he tries! Come with me, my house is filled with friends! You just have to squint REALLY hard to see them. It's kinda dirty inside, kinda scary too, but nothing you can't handle, I'm sure! It's very nice to meet you and I hope we can stay friends forever and ever-"

"Hi."

Her voice cracked. That was it. That was all that came out of her. She gulped. Sighed. Shit.

And they all couldn't help but laugh their hearts out. Kimberlain looked like a tomato, if the fruit could cover its face. Seeing this, The Winter Boy herded his crew. But as she peeked through the slits of her own fingers, she couldn't help but start laughing with them. Soon, the lake of ice echoed with laughter, blissfully unaware of the crow that silently watched.

"Hello!"

An explosion of energy. A string of gold flowed its way past Kim. She traced it to a blonde whose hair curled like sheep's wool. Her eyes matched the gold of her hair, bright and sparkling.

"I'm Sonn Sehnsucht! Nice to meet you!" Kim's hand was shaken vehemently. "You're so cuuute! Oh my gosh, look at that hair! It's gorgeous and straight and fiery, unlike mine! I'm so jealous! We already have twins here, but they're busy somewhere… can we replace them?"

"Uh, yeah, haha." It was the first time Kim saw a proper adult. She looked at Sonn, really looked. Her chest looks heavy. How does she move around so freely? How does she even breathe! Will I look like that when I get older? Furthermore, Kim wasn't used to being the least chatty in the room. Needless to say, she didn’t dislike Sonn.

Away from the older woman stood a man… or woman? Kim couldn't tell and it showed. He was tall, Walter was much taller, but still tall nonetheless. She was thankful that he seemed rather silent and easy to talk to. However, her expectations were promptly dismantled.

"I'm a man." He shook his head. His hair swayed gracefully. It was longer than hers. "God I hate kids. Why do we have to do this again?"

Kimberlain pouted. Why does he hate me? She'd sulk behind a tree if the ground hadn't rumbled slightly. From behind her appeared a chiseled face with every reason to show off. Glistening for no apparent reason, he was a striding clump of bare muscle whose shoulders swayed with each step. How could he dress so little in winter?

He announced like he owned the world, "Bella Faust, your pride cannot handle that your allure is denied by the pure! Fear not, young one, for this lad’s tongue knows nothing but emptiness. Take to heart not his words, but the only beautiful thing about him. His face."

"My tongue and my face are reserved for the ladies, not annoying children! And can you shut the fuck up, Kraftberg?!"

"Only refer to me by my full modesty, Kraftberg Stolzberg!" The hunk’s chest twitched alternately, like a younger Kim’s brows on the mirror.

“BAH!” Bella drew more distance. Are they… are they fighting because of me? Kim’s eyes sank. She figured a step-back would filter the chaos for her, but stumbled on a leg instead. Beneath her was a person she failed to notice earlier.

"Gosh, they're all so loud. Oh, hey there. Can we not sit on my leg so I can sleep?"

There was little to understand about sleeping on the cold ground. But then again, everyone thus far made no sense either. Simply, she shrugged and obeyed.

"Yes. Sorry.” This one seems friendly. “… d-do you have a name?"

"I’m… I am… zzzz~ ACK!"

Sonn jumped on his stomach. He curled like an infant. "Good morning Castro! This guy's name is Castro Schwer~ Oops, you can't catch me! You know that!"

"SONN! COME HERE!"

Kim watched, wide-eyed, as the two ran laps around the forest—one yelling, one laughing. Castro wasn’t friendly after all, and that made her sigh.

At this point, something had come to Kim’s attention. Everyone is an adult, and they have second names. What should mine be? There were no crickets this time, but no answers either. She came to them with a handful of questions, and now she figured she’d leave with a pile. Were they as she had hoped? No. They could’ve been better, she wasn’t sure how. Did she like them? Another uncertainty, but no matter how unexpected they were, the answer certainly wasn't 'no'.

Returning her gaze to the group, she found them silent. Suddenly ordered. Kim mimicked them first before asking herself questions. Finally, it seemed that she can take one off the pile.

"Welcome." The Winter Boy descended from his steed. "I see that you have met my peers already. Were they kind to you?"

"Yeah. I think." She said, eyeing Bella from the side, who glared at her.

"Great! Can you introduce yourself to us?"

The girl’s stomach fluttered. She faced the odd crowd, then nodded quickly and never looked up. She took a deep breath; longer than any breath she’d ever taken. With an exhale just as lengthy, she raised her head.

"My name… is Kimberlain! What an awkward name, you might think, but it's mine! If awkward is the topic, then good ol' Walter's got you covered. He's not the friendliest-looking out here nor is he fond of speaking, but I can assure you that he tries! Come with me, my house is filled with friends! You just have to squint REALLY hard to see them. It's kinda dirty inside, kinda scary too, but nothing you can't handle, I'm sure! It’s very nice to meet you and I hope we can stay friends forever and ever-"

"Hi."

Her voice cracked. That was it. That was all that came out of her. She gulped. Sighed. Shit.

And they all couldn’t help but laugh their hearts out. Kimberlain looked like a tomato, if the fruit could cover its face. Seeing this, The Winter Boy herded them. But as she peeked through the slits of her own fingers, she couldn’t help but start laughing with them. Soon, the lake of ice echoed with laughter, blissfully unaware of the crow that silently watched.

***

End of Chapter 3