A Hard Life

The only light the oppressive thunder clouds allowed to exist in their presence was the brief flashes of eerie violet that streaked through them. Howling winds drowned out all but the loudest cracks of thunder that accompanied the purple lightning, and unforgiving rain threatened to flood the land below.

And yet, despite the turbulent, raging storm all around him, the man who found himself floating so high in the sky that he couldn’t even see the ground was completely unaffected by the swirling chaos. Instead, his attention was focused entirely on the inhuman being that stood before him. Like an ebony, inverted, flickering flame of raindrops in a vaguely humanoid form, the creature was featureless, save for the pure white, wispy triangular motes of light that formed roughly where eyes would be in its head. Its ‘mass’ didn’t reach far enough to form proper hands or feet, but there was a wrongness that radiated from it that made every primal instinct in the man want to run, and yet, he could only watch and wait.

“Oh, wow! I didn’t think that would actually work!” Contrary to the being’s form, presence, and deep, unsettling voice, though, its tone as it saw him arrive was nothing but warm and friendly. “Ha! Take that, Lini! I may not have something as ‘fancy’ or ‘targeted’ as a truck, but I can get one, too, if I try!” The masculine-sounding being said, laughing triumphantly as it jumped around and threw its hands up in celebration. “Oh, man, am I glad that worked, though. Didn’t have the power to try that again.”

With the tension thoroughly killed, leaving only confusion in its wake, the man watched as the intimidating-looking being jumped around for a few moments, then decided to speak up. “U-Um… What’s going on here? Am I dreaming, or something?”

Ceasing its celebration, the shadowy being looked at him, composed itself, and tried to stand in a more regal, imposing posture. “Right. My apologies, mine successor. This must all come as quite the discombobulating surprise for you. Time, however, is an impatient mistress. We have naught the leisure for a lengthy discussion; as such, I shall explain it as succinctly as possible.” Speaking much more eloquently than before, with evident effort to speak using more archaic and flowery language, the being raised an arm at the man, though had not a hand with fingers to point. “You died, my man.”

And once more, the sudden tonal whiplash the man felt as the being spoke of his apparent death so nonchalantly left him unable to respond. Delivered with all the gravitas of something like a mild inconvenience, like the ice cream machine at a restaurant being broken, it didn’t feel real. “Huh? Died? Who? Me?” It was preposterous to even suggest. Sure, a lot of things weren’t making sense, but there was no evidence that he had died. “No way. This has gotta be a dream or something. All I have to do is pinch myself and…” Thinking he could end the nonsense and return to reality, the man tried to move his hand to pinch myself, but only then, when he thought about it, was he aware that he had no hands.

It hadn’t registered when he looked down before, but he hadn’t seen his body or legs either. As the thought of returning to reality crossed his mind, familiar yet blurry memories flashed through his mind.

An old bachelor apartment, not too run-down, but cold and empty.

Watching the storm warning on the TV.

Fighting the wind and rain to get to the store to stock up on supplies.

…And then seeing the unfriendly stray cat struggling to swim in the nearly overflowing drainage channel.

The memories end with him diving into the water. The most unnerving thing about the final memory was how he didn’t have the body to have a physical response to the panic overcoming him. His mind raced, but there was no pounding of her heart, no cold sweats, no uncontrollable trembling. Only his mind was shaken, and he had no body to show that distress to the world.

“You have my sympathies, human, but fret not, for your death has been recognized by Sturmblut Nachtkrieger!” The being said, after giving the man some time to process his circumstances. “You have the qualities of one worthy and capable of being reborn in another world, one of swords and sorcery, of heroes and adventure! With the last of mine strength, I shall send your soul to a land of fantasy and romance!”

“I… died? So, I’m, like, dead right now?” The man asked, trying to process everything. “Like, dead dead.”

“Indeed. You have shuffled off the mortal coil and could pass on to whatever beyond awaits you,” Sturmblut Nachtkrieger said sagely. “Or, you could be reincarnated in a world of magic!”

“A world of magic? So, you’d let me be reborn as the Hero of the land, and set out on an exciting adventure with trusted party members to save the princess and live happily ever after?!” He asked, his voice rising in excitement. “Wait, couldn’t you just revive me instead?”

“Not quite, to both.” His persona of eloquence coming and going, the dark entity shook his head. “There are compatibility… let's call them complications when dealing with human bodies devoid of mana. Souls are different. Easier. Cleaner. So, I can interfere with that, or the weather, but I am unable to revive your, uh, compromised physical vessel.” Visibly wincing at the mention of the state the man’s body was reduced to, Sturmblut Nachtkrieger continued with his explanation, his body slowly beginning to fade from his extremities. “And… you wouldn’t be reborn in Facide as the Hero. That’s the Goddess Lini’s department. Instead, you’re going to be something better, more powerful, and unrestrained by the will of some Goddess! You’ll be reborn as the Demon Lord!”

“Hard pass!” The man answered immediately. “If I really am dead, and not just having a far too lucid dream that I can’t wake up from, I’ll just pass on, thank you very much. Why would I want to be the bad guy and do evil things!?”

“B-But you wouldn’t have to if you don’t want to.” Not expecting such an instant and total refusal, Sturmblut Nachtkrieger quickly tried to get him to reconsider. “This is another world, so Demons in Facide are different than the ones you’re thinking of. The Demon Lord is just the being who leads creatures who are Corrupted and transformed by Dark Magic. They’re not ‘evil’, exactly. Or do you think wild animals are evil?”

The man was silent for a moment as he thought about the offer. If he couldn’t return to his old life, and he wasn’t completely sure what the afterlife awaiting him would be like, it didn’t sound so bad. So long as he wasn’t compelled to do evil, heinous acts. Of course, there was also the chance that he was just dreaming, or in a coma after trying to rescue the cat, and nothing we did mattered. “So, becoming the Demon Lord wouldn’t make me want to plunder villages, sacrifice the innocent, or anything like that?”

“Not unless you already want to.” Sturmblut Nachtkrieger said, nodding. “Though, you will have to defend monsters and demons, since they will be your responsibility. If you can do that without fighting, be my guest.”

“...And, these monsters and demons… Can I pet and play with them?” He asked, shyly.

“Sure! Monsters will love you, and demons will be loyal to you. They’d love it.” The otherworldly being said, holding up an arm likely to give him a thumbs-up. “So, does that mean you’ll do it, human?”

“Can I ask why you chose me, in particular? I’m sure I’m not the only one who died today, but you said I have the right ‘qualities’.” He asked. It didn’t truly matter how or why he was chosen, but he still wanted to know.

Sturmblut Nachtkrieger chuckled at the question and shrugged his shoulders. His form was becoming fainter by the moment. “I was just looking for someone who was a good person. The demons and monsters? They deserve someone who won’t give up on them, to guide them, and not mistreat them. You know?” There was no forced theatrics or linguistic flourishes this time, just the genuine wishes of someone unable to carry on the duty of leadership. “Now, tell me your name, oh new Demon Lord, so that Facide may know whom the Corrupted serve!”

If he had a face, the man would have smirked. “Duncan.”

“Duncan?! No, no. That won’t do. A Demon Lord deserves something grander and imposing!” Unimpressed with such a mundane name, Sturmblut Nachtkrieger thought for a moment.

The swirling storm around them began to calm, and an iridescent light began to penetrate the clouds. It was a gentle light, a comforting light. A light of purity and sublime– “Oi! What da hell do ya think yer doin’, ya twit!” In contrast to the refined beauty of the light that began to illuminate the darkness, the feminine voice that spoke to Sturmblut Nachtkrieger was crass and heavily accented. “When I git me mitts on ya, you’ll–”

“And that’s my cue to get outta here. Uh, Seepu’ll be able to fill you in on all your abilities and powers. Off you go, König Geistdunkelrustung!” Sturmblut Nachtkrieger said quickly, waving him off before the light could reach them. “Oh, and take care of those two while you’re at it.”

Despite being forced back at what felt like a leisurely speed, the distance between Duncan and Sturmblut Nachtkrieger increased disproportionately quickly. But it wasn’t a physical distance that separated them anymore; it transcended the bounds of time and space. It happened so quickly, and his senses began to dull as his consciousness shut down, unable to process the sensations assailing him, that he didn’t have a chance to protest. “What the hell kind of cringelord name is that?!”

*****

There was no discomfort or lingering unease as Duncan opened his eyes, looking up at a dark sky, thick with clouds of ebony and deep violet through the hole in the collapsed ceiling. Despite the limited illumination, his vision was clear and unobscured by the shadows as he sat up and looked around. The stone architecture was reminiscent of ancient castles from fantasy settings as he looked at the ruins surrounding him.

Is this supposed to be my castle? He wondered. Wasn’t I supposed to become the leader of the demons and monsters of this world? I look like some homeless squatter! I–?! Moving without thinking about it, he held up his hands and paused, seeing the dark-colored, heavy, armored gauntlets covering his arms. Looking over his body and trying to touch his face, he found that he was fully encased in a sturdy set of metal armor, adorned with spikes, and a cloak of pseudo-physical shadows. Oh, hell yeah! Now this is starting to feel like I’m in another world! That, or this is just a really convincing dream… Hmm?

Even with all the evidence before him, the armored man still couldn’t fully accept that something so fantastical had become his new reality. However, movement from one of the partially standing doorways that led into the once large, vaulted chamber caught his eye. Two small figures, vaguely humanoid and child-size, crept out of hiding and approached him without hostility or caution. Neither was like any creature he had seen outside of video games or movies. Both were little more than assembled stones and rocks of various sizes, shapes, and colors in a facsimile of bipedal creatures. One had a larger, round stone serving as both its head and torso, with legs and arms comprised of rocks of unequal sizes, causing it to have a natural limp as it moved. The other had a much smaller stone for its torso, and comically oversized stones acting as its head and arms, while stumpy legs wiggled uselessly in the air as it walked on its ‘hand’.

“Oh, hello there! Who are you two?” The deep, resonating voice that came from his body clashed with his soft, non-threatening tone. Low like an inferno, deep like thunder, and resonant like an echo, it was a voice entirely alien to him, yet somehow familiar. He spoke in a manner so as not to frighten them, not that either seemed cautious or frightened of him.

And no sooner had he asked the question than an instinct he had been unaware of instructed him to perform a specific thought. As natural and automatic as breathing, he followed the instinct without a thought, and suddenly, a portion of his vision showed him a translucent display. The words and numbers shown were arranged and organized in an aesthetically pleasing orientation, using an easy-to-read white font with a thin black border, to present information clearly. It wasn’t sufficiently opaque to obstruct his vision, but he could still read it without much concentration. However, an additional display appeared next to the initial one, this time showing a list of words that he could understand, but had no context for what they meant, as one in particular was highlighted.

The entire process transpired in a fraction of a second. As fast as he could think, it had reacted, and after the word “Research” was highlighted on the secondary list, two more, smaller displays appeared around the small creatures of stone, positioned in a way not to obstruct either.

Golem [Common] Race: Monster Sub Race: Golem Level: 1
Hit Points: 3/3 Mana: 11/11 Stamina: 6/6
[Additional Information]

Huh? Information just… appeared? So, wait, am I in a video game, or is this just a spell that conveys information in a more digestible manner? Reading over the weak, stone monsters’ stat blocks, the method by which the information was conveyed to him was familiar. Quickly, he glanced at the first display that appeared.

König Geistdunkelrustung [Legendary] Race: Greater Demon Level: 20

“Damnit! That bastard really did set my name to that. Can I change–?!” Before he could finish looking at his own information, a bright flash of light erupted from the far end of the ruined room, blinding him for a second, and demanding his attention. Huh? Wh-What’s going on?

Turning to look at the source of the light as it faded, he saw that two women had appeared out of nowhere.

The shorter of the two was a younger-looking woman with short, brown hair, dark brown eyes, and freckles prominently displayed across her cheeks. She was dressed head to toe in golden equipment. A diadem with a sapphire gem set in the middle. Polished chestplate and shoulder pauldrons that seemed to radiate light. Even her pants and boots looked to be made of gold that had, somehow, been given the texture and flexibility of cotton and leather, respectively. Her shining sword was already drawn, and the oval-shaped shield in her off-hand looked to be little more than a frame of golden metal with a gem set in the center of the cross-section that projected a flowing veil of amber light.

The taller was a stunning blonde with a well-developed and curvaceous figure beneath the form-fitting, unblemished, white gown she wore. Her long, straight hair flowed down past her hips, with blunt bangs covering the right side of her face. Her visible eye was much sharper than her companion’s and glowed with a glimmer of unearthly light. She, too, had many golden accessories, including a laurel and a staff. But the more eye-catching items were the scarf and sash she wore. Both looked to be made of a fine, delicate silk that transitioned from threads of gold to an untainted white, each radiating a soft glow from its golden sections. However, she didn’t wear the scarf so much as it floated around her arms and behind her back.

Who are they? They don’t look like demons or monsters… He thought as the two girls talked to each other. Once more, his mental desire prompted the display to select the “Research” option he had selected before, though this time he saw it was from the category labeled “Magic”. Oh, so it’s an identification spell? Wow, this really is a world of magic and swordsmanship! Focusing his will on the spell, he looked at the two women once more, and their stats were displayed for him like they were for the golems.

Inessa the Champion [Advanced] Race: Human Level: 10
Hit Points: 649/649 Mana: 189/289 Stamina: 355/388
[Additional Information]

Lylia [Advanced] Race: Human Level: 10
Hit Points: 305/305 Mana: 532/732 Stamina: 160/160
[Additional Information]

Huh? Level 10? Those golems were Level 1, and I’m Level 20… They’re obviously not demons either, so that means I’ll have to fight them, right? Conflicted over the level difference, he didn’t want the first thing he did in this new world to be beating up women. Well, maybe I can just scare them off with something–hm? Wanting to find a non-violent solution, he went to look at what other spells he had available when two things happened.

First, he noticed that almost every spell listed in his Magic list was displayed with a dull grey color instead of the white that most of the text was displayed with. And each of these entries read “MISSING”.

And second, faster than he could react, the girl in the golden armor, Inessa, closed the distance between her and him. Without even looking at him, she nonchalantly stabbed her sword through his chest. The tip of her weapon penetrated his thick armor plating like a hot knife through butter, as she continued to talk with her companion, Lylia.

“H-Huh?” He barely coughed out, more in disbelief than pain.

“Hmm? Oh, wait. You’re not Nachty.” Inessa said, turning to look at him.