Final Days

Zinna rests almost all her weight on me as we walk back to the orphanage after eating. Well I walk, the drunk woman more so stumbles and shuffles.

“You’re a weird kid Lydia.”, Zinna says with annoyance. She is definitely a mean drunk. “You always seem like an annoying know-it-all.”, She continues. “You throw a mean hook though!”, She jokingly mutters into my ear. She is aware that I nearly killed another child, why is she making a joke about it? She was the one that apparently stopped me too!

“There you two are!”, Fran’s motherly voice can be heard before I can vocalize a response to Zinna. Fran walks out to meet us and looks at us as she speaks, “Are you drunk Zinna?” I nod to answer the question as the older caretaker shifts the drunk’s weight off of me and on to her own shoulders. “I can’t believe you! You were supposed to be back hours ago.”, She berates the drunk, “And to have one of the children have to take care of you as well!” I breath a sigh of relief as I follow the two caretakers inside.

-- -- --

“Show us your clothes!”, Arlene says to me clearly unable to hide her excitement as Dandelion and I head upstairs. I suppose modeling clothes might be more of a gal thing and I am technically a girl, right? Before I get too lost in thought I nod my head.

“Not until tomorrow.”, Dandelion answers the eager preteen from the top of the stairs. “Zinna kept Lydia out too late.”, The young woman groans letting her annoyance be known.

“It’s not that late though.”, I mutter in response as my gaze meets the caretaker’s own. Dandelion simply shakes her head in disagreement. “Alright.”, I respond. I turn my head to Arlene and give her a smile as I speak, “I guess we’ll do it tomorrow.”

“Okay.”, Arlene replies with a hint of melancholy mixed in with her joy. Without another word, the girl runs off towards the shared bedroom of the other kids.

“So.”, Dandelion says to me after a moment of silence. She opens the door to our shared room as she continues, “Did you have fun?” Not particularly, Zinna is just weird and also an angry drunk.

“It was alright.”, I lie to her. “That is until Zinna dragged me to dinner and got drunk.”, I add to put a hint of honesty into it.

“She did what?”, Dandelion exclaims with a look of horror stricken across her face. “You’re not hurt are you!?”, She asks and steps over to me beginning to inspect for any injuries.

“I’m not hurt.”, I answer as I try to push her probing hands away from me. “She’s a mean drunk though.”, I add before pulling the bed sheet over me.

“Mean? How so?”, Dandelion asks still concerned as she lays into her own bed.

“It was mostly just getting annoyed at me when I didn’t react how she wanted me to.”, I say with a yawn. “She was exhausting because of it.”, I add. A moment of silence falls between us meaning that I had answered the young woman’s questions satisfactorily.

“Sleep well Lydia.”, Dandelion says with a sigh of relief.

-- -- --

“Oooooooo!”, Arlene excitedly cheers as I turn around showing her and Mona my new outfits. “Why’d you pick this outfit?”, She cheerfully inquires me.

“It’s comfy.”, I answer bluntly as I turn around the corner to change into my other outfit.

“That’s it?”, Mona asks confused by the simple answer.

“Yeah. The skirt feels like it gives a lot of mobility while the tunic is loose enough to not feel restrictive.”, I explain in more detail from around the corner as I change into my other new clothes.

“Are the clothes being comfy important for you?”, Arlene asks me with genuine curiosity.

“Yeah. I move around a lot so I’m not a fan of restrictive clothes like dresses.”, I answer as I grab the pair of pants and slip them on.

“Fan?”, Mona repeats the word notifying me that she does not know the meaning.

“It just means I don’t like them.”, I say as I pop my head around the corner to see the two girls still looking confused.

“So what does restrictive mean?”, Arlene asks. I step back around the corner to show off my pants and tunic.

“It means they are difficult to move in.”, I explain. “Now, how do I look?”, I ask as I turn around to show the back of my new outfit as well.

-- -- --

I step into the large infirmary to a surprise, multiple actually. The first being, Gardenia is the caretaker in the room. The second and more important one being, Darren is finally awake! Darren’s eyes go wide at the sight of his almost murderer.

“Wh-what is sh-she doing he-here!?”, The boy stammers out in horror as he grasps Gardenia’s arm.

“She’s been here almost every day making sure you’re alright.”, Gardenia says in her calming motherly voice. I would probably swoon at the sound of it if it was just the two of us.

“I’m so sorry Darren.”, I say with a lowered head. No, that is not enough. I lower myself to my knees and rest my forehead against the cold dirty floor. “What I did was inexcusable.”, I continue, “It was a vast overreaction to some ribbing from you three.”

“She’s apologizing Darren.”, Gardenia explains to the child. I guess they do not bow like this in Seruna. Or maybe it was the vocabulary? I sigh in resignation and raise my head to look at the boy.

“I’m leaving soon and wanted to make sure you were okay before I left.”, I explain as I sit up properly.

“You’re leaving soon?”, Darren asks clearly confused. He has been unconscious for weeks so it is understandable.

“She’s joining the Slayers’ Guild in a few days.”, Gardenia gently explains to Darren as she softly tousles the boy’s hair.

“I’m not seeking your forgiveness really.”, I explain further as I stand up. “I’m letting you know that I am sorry for the horrible violence though.”, I continue dusting my ragged dress off. “I didn’t want to have any regrets before I left.”, I finish as I clench my fist. I feel frustrated as I start thinking about all the things I left unsaid or never did before coming here. Before becoming Lydia.

“Are you okay?”, Gardenia inquires bringing me back to the infirmary from my thoughts. The room was blurring.

“I’m fine.”, I answer as I wipe the tears from my eyes. I could have done so much before… before… all this. At least I saved those kids…