He wears himself out like a real idiot

«We’ve been traveling for three days now. It’s impossible we haven’t even found the shadow of a village.»

“Why is she complaining? She hasn’t done anything but float around at my expense. Honestly,” I glance back. “I feel a little guilty. It’s like I’m just exploiting Nadia for her cooking and her experience. She really got unlucky, traveling with two slackers like us.”

«Hey, boy, look!» she exclaims, leaning on my head with her hand. “Get off me! If you push my head down, how am I supposed to see who it is?”

I hear the approaching rumble of wheels—not too big, probably a cart. But oddly, there’s no sound of hooves. I strain my neck with a trapezius effort, but all I get is a painful crack in my spine and a stabbing ache in my vertebrae. «L-Laila, could you please get down?»

«No! Piggyback, now!» She throws her weight onto my shoulders. The pain bends me double. “Damn it hurts!” I push myself upright with every ounce of strength I have. «How funny! Your face is all red! What’s the matter, embarrassed?»

«N-no.» “I strained so hard my head’s throbbing.”

«What are you doing?» a man’s voice asks, sharp and annoyed. “Now that I notice… the cart’s noise has stopped.”

«A totem!» Laila replies.

“A totem?” I wonder, looking up. «When did that little girl climb on your shoulders?»

«While you were shitting yourself trying to stand straight.»

«I don’t know what this totem is supposed to be, but it sounds stupid.»

«Yeah, it is… sir?» I finally lift my eyes and see a strange beast, about the size of a horse. Its coat is snow-white, fur thicker around its legs, neck, and tail. A crimson bone-like mask covers its face, ending in horns.

«I’m behind the cherveny roh, idiot.» His voice comes from beyond the beast. I’d like to see him properly, but right now, I can barely stand.

«Oh! What a strange little creature! Can I pet it?»

«No.» “What a flat, tired answer. He could at least put some spark into it.”

«Well, if you want, you can pet my strange little creature. Careful though—his stupidity’s contagious.» “She points at me as if I don't see her.”

«The answer’s still no.»

Laila floats toward him, dropping the girl in the process. I catch her in my arms, a sharp pain stabbing my back. “Just admit you’re trying to kill me!” «Wow, what do we have here? An edgy boy? Exciting,» Laila purrs.

«I’m a merchant. I don’t know what an ‘edgy’ is.»

I set Nadia down gently and step closer to the merchant. What strikes me first is his clothing—similar to Nadia’s, but layered with garments that remind me of African robes, topped with a rectangular mask with horns, a triangular nose, and almond-shaped eyes.

I extend my right hand. «I’m Søren, nice to meet you.» He just stares at me. I slowly lower my arm. “Great. Now I feel like an idiot.”

«You’re not from around here, are you?» he asks, gripping his mask by the chin and lifting it off. Underneath, dark skin, dreadlocks falling down his back. “He looks only a few years older than me.”

«Y-yeah.»

«Abandon all hope, you who enter the ruined kingdom.» “Ruined kingdom?”

«Listen, Mr. Edgy,» Laila slides next to him, throwing an arm around his neck, «we just need a ride to the next city. After that, you’ll have all the time you want to drown us with your ‘I’m a brooding guy with a creepy cart, buaaahhh, look at me, so dark and tortured, elbows on my knees buaaahhh.’»

He stares ahead, clearly irritated. “If Laila keeps talking, we can forget about the ride and any information.” «S-sorry to bother you.»

«What?» he asks, tiredly shifting his eyes toward me.

«Despite what my friend says, we really do need a ride… and maybe an explanation of what happened to this kingdom.»

He sighs, massaging his temples. «Uuuugh, my headache… Fine. Just shut up and make yourselves useful.»

«Thanks!» Laila yells. The boy shoots her a glare.

«Laila, just shut up for a while.» “Shit! That slipped out! I let his attitude rub off on me.” But strangely, she doesn’t reply. She just glares at me instead. “She must be pissed… And she’s right. I shouldn’t have snapped like that. I’m such a piece of shit.” «Laila, I—»

«I don’t feel like wasting the whole day here. Move.»

«R-right.» I help Nadia climb onto the back of the cart, where the three of us settle down.

°°°

Only the harsh clatter of wheels on stone breaks the silence. Hours pass, heavy and suffocating, all because of me. I’ve stolen a few glances at Laila, but she won’t look at me. Not a single word slips out either; she just sits there, arms crossed, lips pressed in a thin line. To give her space, I even squeezed next to the merchant. “She’s furious, and I can’t blame her. I said something awful… What the hell is wrong with me? I can’t even find the courage to apologize or look her in the eye… She’s the only one who puts up with me, and I treated her like shit. She doesn’t deserve this. She doesn’t deserve me."

«Shit,» I mutter, low enough that only he hears.

«It sucks, saying the wrong thing, doesn’t it?» His rasping whisper cuts through me, making me feel even worse. “I wish things could go back to normal. I wronged her, and now it’s on me to make the first move. But how?”

The merchant turns and fixes me with tired eyes. «Why are you even here? What the hell do you want?»

“Maybe I should focus on something else for now. If I keep spiraling, I won’t get anywhere.” «What happened to this world?» I ask in a weak voice.

He exhales heavily, chest swelling. «Uuuugh, damn me for asking… My headache’s killing me, so I’ll keep it short.» He pulls a pipe from a pouch and stuffs it with dried herbs. The scent when he lights it isn’t tobacco, but something light, almost vaporous. «From what I know, this kingdom wasn’t always like this. Once, it was prosperous—full of colors, full of people, animals, life. But one day, everything changed. An event people call the Rise of the Lord of Ashes. His power corrupted the lands of his kingdom and spreads into those he conquers. Many died, and rebellions were crushed by his armies. And now here we are, living in a rotting world. That’s all you get. Now I need rest.» He lies back, forearm across his face.

“Not the most detailed answer, but better than nothing. I’ll leave him be for now… Wait!” I touch his shoulder. «S-sorry, if you need to rest we can stop.»

«No need. Mbud can handle it alone.»

«Who?»

«The cherveny roh.»