Frogged

Let me sum things up. Six months ago, I decided to stop being a bum, dropped out of high school, started working out, and cut back on video games… and now, I’m stuck in some weird fantasy world—and I’m not even the main character!

Honestly, though? I'd rather be the side character if it means I can just get home. As much as it pains me to admit, Kamei is way stronger than I am. Without her, I'd be cooked.

Speaking of Kamei, I don’t know much about her. Sure, she’s got pink hair, and she’s pretty cute when her mask is down. She always smells like sweet strawberries whenever the wind blows, and she’s a great fighter. She seems like the tsundere type, though, and honestly, I can’t read her at all.

I’d love to get to know her better, but I’ve got a terrible case of “scareditis”—which basically means I’m incapable of talking to any woman, period. Still, I’ve noticed she keeps glancing back at me. Could it be that she finds me attractive? Heh, maybe my popular phase is finally kicking in!

Of course! This must be the story where I slowly unlock my powers and end up with a harem by the end of the series. How could I forget!? Alright, I’ll say something to her—

“How long are you going to keep staring at me from behind?” Kamei suddenly stopped and glared at me, her eyes cold.

“Huh? I wasn’t staring at you!” I blurted out.

“Yeah, sure. It’s okay to admit when you’re wrong,” she sneered, a smirk playing on her lips.

“For your information, I was just about to start a conversation,” I shot back, crossing my arms defensively.

“Oh, really now?” she said, leaning in closer, her face inches from mine.

Ah! Too close! I’ve never had a woman this close to me except for Inari and my mom.

“Hmm, well, whatever,” she muttered, regaining her composure. “I am curious, though. Where are you from, Yuuki?”

“I don’t suppose you’ve heard of a place called Japan?”

“No. Never.”

I really am in another world, huh…

“Figures.”

“What brings you to Nod?”

“I’ve been asking myself that ever since I got here.”

“Pfffft, HAHAHAHAHAHA!”

“Why are you laughing!?”

“Because you’re such an unusual person. It’s hilarious.”

“Do you want me to hate you?” I grumbled.

Forget a harem. I don’t like this girl.

“What about you, Kamei?”

“What about me?”

“Yeah? Tell me about yourself.”

“Watch it.”

“Huh?”

What does she mean, ‘watch it’? And what’s with that worried, hostile look on her face?

“Am I not allowed to ask any questions back? What kind of conversation—”

“I SAID WATCH OUT!”

Kamei lunged forward, once again way too close to my face. We both crashed to the ground as an explosion erupted by the boulder we had been walking toward. The force was too quick for me to fully comprehend.

Kamei was now practically on top of me, closer than ever before. My face flushed. What am I even supposed to do in this kind of situation? Should I compliment her?

“That was a nice jump, Kamei.”

“Oh, be for real! You could’ve just died, you buffoon!”

“I could have?” I glanced behind me, trying to make out the scene upside down. Yep, that definitely looks like a giant frog.

“A frog? Bahahahaha!”

“Why are you laughing?” she yelled, clearly irritated.

I get it if she’s afraid of frogs. I won’t lie—it’s intimidating that it’s bigger than usual, but that doesn’t scare me. After all, I’m supposed to be the main character of this story. Maybe I have insane luck or a healing factor. Either way, this is my chance to show Kamei what I’m made of.

I pushed myself off the ground, walking proudly toward the giant frog.

Kamei stared at me, bewildered. “What’s that idiot thinking? Was he hiding his true capabilities this whole time?”

Now, I stood face-to-face with the ferocious beast, the wind conveniently whipping through my hair. But a little intimidation wouldn’t shake me, because I’m him. I’m Katsu Yuuki.

“Pick on someone your own size, you filthy amphibian,” I proclaimed, puffing out my chest.

The frog croaked, its mouth widening ominously. I spotted a stick on the ground and quickly picked it up, bracing myself for the life-or-death battle ahead. 

“Seriously? A stick?” Kamei muttered, clearly unimpressed. “What are you going to do with that?”

Hmph, she truly underestimates the power of plot armor. Just watch, Kamei. Let me cook.

The frog’s mouth opened even wider, but instead of a tongue, a massive shotgun emerged from its gaping maw. My body froze in sheer disbelief.

“IS THAT A WHOLE ASS SHOTGUN?!” I shouted, my voice trembling.

“What’d you think it’d be, you idiot!?”

“WHAT ELSE BUT A TONGUE IS SUPPOSED TO BE THERE?!”

I keep forgetting—nothing in this world is ordinary. Guess I’ll have to use my secret weapon. A secret move I haven't used since my senior years.… running for my life.

The gun-tongue fired, a blast of searing fire aimed straight at us. Kamei and I bolted as fast as we could, narrowly dodging the flaming trail.

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”

“You’re pathetic, Yuuki! I can’t believe I thought you’d actually be useful!”

“I HOPE THE STUPID FROG KILLS US BOTH!”

“Calm down! I’ll handle this, but I need you to act as bait!”

“What!?” I stared at her, hoping she was joking.

“Can you do it?” she asked, dead serious.

“I mean, maybe!?”

“That’ll have to do!” Kamei replied, swiftly weaving to the side, her signature pink shotgun already in hand as she sprinted into position.

As Kamei darted toward the frog with incredible speed, its focus shifted from me to her, redirecting its fire. With the pressure off, I collapsed to the ground, gasping for breath. I hadn’t sprinted like that in ages. Who knew I could outrun bullets? Then again, it’s probably just another one of Nod’s weird physics.

Panting, I watched as Kamei skillfully weaved side to side, narrowly dodging each bullet that flew her way.

“She really is amazing…” I muttered in awe.

“Yuuki, bait up already!” she yelled, her voice snapping me back to reality.

“Huh! I thought you were joking!”

“Hurry up!”

“To be fair, you seem like you’re doing fine,” I smirked, trying to stall.

“I can’t fully charge my shot with it on my ass, you idiot!”

Really!? How many times am I going to risk getting shot in this world? Can’t anything go my way for once?

“Argh, fine!”

Reluctantly, I forced myself up and sprinted toward Kamei, who was now desperately calling for my help. As I got closer to the frog and the inevitable danger, I hurled the stick in my hand, aiming for its mouth. But my nerves got the better of me, and I only managed to hit its stomach.

Miraculously, it seemed to work—the frog froze, its actions halting as if someone hit the pause button.

“Oh... that worked,” I muttered, relief flooding through me. But my joy was short-lived.

The frog slowly turned its head toward me, and I felt a wave of malice that made my feet instinctively shuffle backward.

Oh I know that look anywhere. It was like it was telling me “What did you do to me you little punk!?”. It's like I'm reliving my senior years all over again. I certainly love reliving trauma, am I right? Well I'd consider this 100× worse because at least my enemies back then didn't have guns!

“N-Now, now, froggy, let's not get hasty, shall we?” I stammered, trying to reason with the beast.

Its eyes glowed an ominous red, and it immediately began charging a powerful shot. The force generated gusts of wind, whipping the grass and dust around us, pushing everything in its wake. But seriously—why is a frog this OP!? Who’s in charge of balancing this world?!

Without another thought, I turned and sprinted for my life…again. I feel like I’ll be saying that a lot from now on.

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”

The frog unleashed a blast that felt like the sun itself was bearing down on me. I barely managed to dodge by throwing myself face-first into the patchy grass. The explosion was deafening, my ears ringing painfully as I scrambled to my feet, heart pounding like it was about to burst from my chest.

“A FROG IS NOT DOING ALL THAT!?” I cried out in disbelief.

Thankfully, my frantic distraction had given Kamei the chance to charge up what I could only imagine would be a super cool, game-ending shot.

She grinned confidently, “Great work, Yuuki. Now it’s my turn.”

Smoke billowed from the frog's gun-tongue; it seemed momentarily stunned. Reeling from the recoil, it began to weaken. If we’re going to beat this thing, it’s now or never!

Kamei leaped into the air with a beauty and power that defied logic, bringing herself eye-level with the monstrous frog.

“Chæoku!” she called out, and a spirit-like creature, the same as back in that tavern materialized behind her. Aiming her shotgun upside down as she descended, it was clear that Kamei wasn’t holding back.

The frog let out a guttural croak, attempting to retaliate, but it was too late.

Kamei began chanting what I could only assume was a spell. The sky darkened, stars gathering in the muzzle of her shotgun, glowing with cosmic energy.

“By the stars above, I summon light, a burst of power, pure and bright. Celestial fire, guide my aim. With cosmic force, ignite the flame. Let this shot, with starlight gleam.

Starshot Sublime!”

With those words, Kamei unleashed a devastating beam from her heavenly shotgun, striking the frog dead-on. The ensuing explosion was cataclysmic, the shockwave so powerful it hurled me across the plains like a ragdoll.

“AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”

As I lay sprawled over the devastated landscape, dazed and aching, I couldn't help but think: All this for a frog...?