Sensing the Mana

We had already gone quite far from the village.

The scenery was very similar to what I saw when I traveled by carriage for the first time in this world after awakening in the ruins. Yellowish meadows, animals I didn’t recognize, and a drowsy heat.

I had tried to use my phone to entertain myself for a while, but its battery had long since died. It was to be expected, since I had already spent several days in this world, though it still unsettled me not to have any idea of when it happened.

Anyway, with not much to do during the trip, there was only one thing I could really try.

“Meditate?”

“Yes. If you want to be able to use mana, you first need to learn how to feel it inside your body,” Liz replied. “Meditation is the most efficient way. Just close your eyes and try to sense something within you.”

It sounded simple, but the vagueness of the instructions worried me a little. How was I supposed to know when I actually felt something? How long would it take me? Too many doubts clouded my mind.

However, my doubts didn’t seem like they would be answered easily, so I resigned myself and sat down comfortably to start meditating.

“Yes! Just like that! Now close your eyes and concentrate.”

“Alright,” I replied, following her instructions.

She told me I had to feel the mana within me. Yet, when I closed my eyes, I didn’t feel anything particularly strange. I could sense the heat of the surroundings and the wind brushing against my skin, but not much more.

And not to mention…

Clunk

…the jolts of the carriage against rocks and bumps in the road that kept me from focusing. Every time I tried to lose myself in meditation, a jolt would break my concentration and I had to start over.

This was no doubt going to be a long road.

***

The journey continued. Several hours passed and things didn’t seem to be going all that well, but I was lucky that the road had smoothed out considerably, so I was able to keep trying to meditate.

It took me a while, but at last I felt everything around me fade away. I stopped feeling the heat and the breeze, focusing only on my inner self. It was as if I were floating in a dark space.

Finally, in the distance, I could see something. A faint, faraway light. Normally, people say you shouldn’t follow the light at the end of the tunnel, but I don’t think I have much choice right now.

I approached that light slowly, as it grew brighter and larger the closer I got. I even began to hear faint whispers inside my head.

“…keep going…” said a female voice. The same one I had heard in the ruins, whose origin I still didn’t know.

I was close—so close to touching the light—but then…

Clunk

The carriage hit a rock again. I completely lost my focus and even opened my eyes in fright. I had to start all over again.

“Aaaaaaaaah!” I shouted into the air, startling Liz.

“What’s wrong!? Are you okay!?” she asked, worried.

“I was so close… but I lost my concentration…”

I hugged my knees and buried my face in them, frustrated at not being able to complete the meditation properly. It was unbelievably frustrating.

“D-don’t get discouraged!” Liz exclaimed. “If you say you were that close, that’s a huge achievement for your first day.”

To be honest, I wasn’t sure how long it usually took mages to do something like this, but if Liz said I was making good progress, then maybe things weren’t as bad as I had thought at first.

“Once you can feel mana, the next thing you’ll need to learn is how to guide it,” she explained. “It will be like a current flowing through your whole body, and you must guide it wherever you want in order to release it,” she added.

As she spoke, she brought her hands together, and they began to glow with a dim light that grew brighter and brighter until, finally, something emerged. It was like a small visible breeze of the same green tone as all her attacks so far.

“I think I get it… Thanks!”

Liz nodded at my gratitude with a smile, but then her expression suddenly changed. She now seemed distracted, as if lost in thought.

“Is something wrong?” I asked.

She remained silent for a few moments until she eventually replied with another question.

“Could you help me with something?”

At her request, I agreed without much hesitation, and she smiled again. Then she stretched out her hand, pointing back toward the path we had already traveled, and began murmuring.

“Ferazka. Bravûm Therenil. Taryon Azkarûn. Gronthar Azkarûn…”

As what seemed to be her chant went on, a massive spear of brilliant green light began to form in front of her… It was even bigger than the one she had used against the golem!

“Liz! Wait!” I shouted in alarm. “What are you doing!?”

She didn’t stop despite my protest. The spear seemed finally complete, and then she shouted its name.

“Spiritual Spear!”

The spell shot out from her hands, streaking across the meadow we had just crossed, and once it reached a certain distance, it burst apart in a vivid explosion of mana that reminded me of fireworks from my world.

As expected, after such a massive attack, Liz collapsed, but luckily I managed to catch her before she hurt herself.

“Are you crazy!?” I yelled.

We had already been through this before. She had survived by sheer miracle when she fought the golem—so why risk herself again now!?

Liz said nothing. Instead, she just moved closer to hug me, just like she had back in the cave.

“Hey! What are you…!?”

“I knew it…” she whispered.

Her words left me utterly bewildered. What was she supposed to have discovered by risking her life like it was nothing?

“I still don’t understand how, but… being near you helps me recover mana,” she explained.

It was incredible to hear. I still remembered her telling me how mages had been cast aside after the sacred tree’s mana had vanished, leaving them incredibly weakened with very slow mana regeneration. But now Liz was saying that I helped her recover it? It was strange, to say the least.

Could it be because of my condition as a summoned one? Assuming I really was summoned, at least.

“By being with you… I’ll be able to keep using magic without worrying about mana…” she said with a smile, though clearly exhausted from her earlier spell.

I couldn’t help but feel guilty at her words. I had already decided I wouldn’t let her be exposed to any more battles or danger. I needed to tell her that.

“Liz, I…”

“Sorry, I think… I’ll just sleep for a bit… I’m tired,” she interrupted.

A couple of minutes later, she closed her eyes and fell asleep, resting on my lap. I couldn’t move her because I didn’t want to wake her, nor did I want to take risks with the lack of mana. If what she said was true, then staying by my side was best.

With her asleep, I began meditating again. I had to master my mana—I didn’t want to depend on Liz and her magic.

I don’t know if it was because of my determination or because I had gotten so close earlier, but this time the meditation was far more effective. I could see the light again in the distance within the darkness, and I approached once more. Once the light was right before me, all the surrounding darkness vanished, giving way to a blinding radiance that made me open my eyes again.

However, something was different this time.

I could feel something. Something was flowing through my body; subtle, but undeniably present.

I think I finally did it.

At last, I was able to reach the mana within me.