His Farewell

I awoke to the sound of shuffling, grunting as something weighed my chest. I begrudgingly opened my eyes, spying an arm sprawled on me. I lifted my head in the direction of the body it was attached to. It was Aelius's wife.

Her blonde hair covered her face as she slept soundly. I continued to watch her face, a serene mask washing her visage. She was beautiful... but she was not my wife.

The years this body had spent with her were its own; I didn't remember any of the experience. But wasn't this what I wanted? An opportunity to live with a wife and two kids, to be a parent. The opportunity basically landed on my lap, but as I stared at her peaceful face and hair that glowed due to the sunshine beaming through the window, all I felt was a taste of bitterness in my mouth. No matter what the past was, this woman, her children, and this body were a family, but I did not belong. I, Kuroda Riku, was a stranger.

I resolved to live a better life than in the past. Living as Aelius was one thing, but believing I was entitled to take this family for myself disturbed me to my core.

I carefully pushed away her arm, with an extra effort, I made my movements concise and with grace, so as not to wake her up. Just as I quietly escaped her embrace, I got out of bed in the same manner and stood in front of the window. Twice now that I have ascertained whether or not this was a dream, and twice it ended with concluding that it is not.

Peering into the world outside, the house had a nice view of the city as it was built near a stone bridge that connected an urban residential area to the rest of the city. The sun was still only rising and had probably just concluded blue hour. The view may not have been the best, but in some ways it was still exciting. Similar to feeling like you're a tourist in a foreign country, only I immigrated and passed on to an entirely different world.

I turned to Aelius's wife, who still slept soundly. I had to figure out her name, but I didn't know what I should say. I couldn't just bring up that I was from another world inside her husband's body, whose soul had passed on. I also didn't know whether I should fulfill this commitment, which I had no personal obligation to, or just leave altogether. I wasn't ungrateful for being given this chance, and I would not want to break up a happy family by leaving. That would be a despicable thing to do, and despite working a career in the underworld, I still had standards that I would continue to uphold.

I walked over to her and crouched. "I won't let this family experience the same future I was dealt with."

. . .

Consciousness fades back into Gwenn. She heard someone speaking, but couldn't discern exactly what had been spoken. Slowly, she opened her eyes and discovered Aelius beside the bed, crouching, his eyes staring off into space.

It was a nice view to wake up to. The visage of the man she loved, safe from the ordeal she worried about for two days. She raised her hand and reached for his face.

Slow to react, he only moved once he felt her touch on his face, and Aelius stared at her.

. . .

She was awake. Had I woken her? Had she heard me? Was my voice too loud?

Something inside me was losing its composure. Panic was slowly rising, a rare phenomenon for me. If she had heard what I said, I'm going to have to come clean, but how? I'm not prepared. What if this ruined the family? Could it ruin the family? Would I be breaking up my family or Aelius's? Was I weighing whether or not it's better if it were Aelius's?

I'm an asshole.

As the inside of my head was turned upside down, the stare of her eyes broke me away from my quiet distress and replaced it with a serene calmness. Her green eyes shone like a pair of jewels, lathered in golden strips of hair, lavishly decorated without any restraint, as just her entire self was a natural regalia.

"Is something wrong, dear?"

I broke away from the hypnotic view of an awoken sleeping beauty and quickly nodded.

"Yeah, I am. Thanks for asking."

If I wanted to know her name, I should pose it as a playful question, but what if she then asked something back, and I didn't know the answer? I couldn't risk arousing her suspicion. Just then, I thought of some people who could help.

"Um... Dear."

"Hm?" Her head perked up.

"When do I work again?"

"Why are you asking? Do you want to stay in?"

"No. It's not that."

"Are you sure? I won't be mad. I think you deserve a break after yesterday."

"I'm really fine. I just... don't remember because yesterday was so stressful that I guess I subconsciously threw away the schedule from my head."

She looked at me with a straight face and burst into a giggle. Her voice was a very melodic tune as she laughed. I smiled unconsciously at the sight. Actually, I wouldn't mind marrying her again.

She composed herself and looked at me. "Alright. You start just before noon, so you've still got time before then."

"Okay, thank you, dear," I said as I stood up.

Her nose twitched as she sniffed. "Oh, you still haven't bathed?"

"Oh, um... I forgot."

"Yeah, I know. You were exhausted, so I didn't wake you. I thought you had taken a shower already since you woke up earlier than I, which rarely happens." 

"Well, I was sort of distracted. I'll go take a bath now." I tried to move away to head for the master bathroom, but she grabbed my wrist in a flash and prevented me from leaving.

"Wait a minute, how long have you exactly been staring at my face while I slept?"

"Would it be a mistake to say for a while?" I asked sheepishly.

"Unless it wasn't your intention to make me happy, then I would say no." She smiled. "Now go take a bath." She hurried me, letting her grip slip away from my wrist.

I paused in front of the bathroom door, looking back over my shoulder. The decision didn't feel like my own, but at the same time, it was. "Thank you for always being a great pillar in my life," I said sincerely, though for some reason it felt like I was saying goodbye — as if I was passing on someone's farewell.

She stared at me, perplexed by my sudden show of gratitude. "Compliments won't let you escape washing yourself," she laughed. "Hurry on already!"

I broke my gaze away from her and headed inside to take a bath.