Prologue

It is with our deepest sympathies that we inform you of the passing of Otani Suzume–

Those words from last night still ring in my aching head. The rattling of the train doesn’t help either. Drinking so much last night was a bad idea. I press my head against the cold glass window which gives me minor relief. It’s approaching midnight, making it hard to see anything past the darkness and snow pelting the speeding train. At least it’s not crowded. Once the train left Tokyo, the cart cleared out. There’s only a few stragglers, giving me plenty of space.

A buzzing in my pocket pulls my attention away from the snowy view. I take out my phone to see I'm getting a call from Ai Otani. I have never wanted to pick up a phone less.

I head to the gangway so I won’t disturb the others. I duck my head and go through the door at an angle, these trains weren’t built for big guys like me. I swallow the lump in my throat and press the phone against my ear.

“Ms. Otani?” I say.

“Oh, hello Daisuke,” A warm voice replies, “I wanted to check in before we went to bed. How are you?”

I clear my throat before replying. “Fine–fine. I’ve… been better, that’s for certain.”

Ms. Otani releases a deep mournful breath. “I think that’s how everyone here feels,” She says, “especially Momoko–” My stomach drops as she says the name. “Though, I was relieved when you told us you were coming,” she continues, “and while she won’t admit it, Momo is anxious to meet her dad.”

My finger involuntarily rapidly taps the back of my cell. “Right–” I say in a cracked voice, I take a deep breath and regain my composure, “right, I–uh… I’m excited to meet her too. Just wish it was under better circumstances.”

We sit in a long silence before Ms. Otani speaks again. “Yes, well, what can you do? Anyway, I know it’s late, but are sure you don’t want to spend the night with us? Me and Yusuke can pick you up from the station–”

“No!” I interrupt, “No–I wouldn’t want to be a burden. Besides, I can’t imagine how weird that would be for Momo,” or me, “I’ll just stay at the motel: It’s closer to the station anyway.”

“Hm. If you insist. Ah, it’s getting late, so we’ll leave you be. Call us if you need anything, Daisuke.” Otani says.

Her words sounded genuine. Hearing them gave me the most comfort I’ve felt all day. “Thank you, Ms. Otani,” I say.

“Oh please my dear, call me Ai.” She says.

“Thank you, Ai.”

“Of course. We can talk about the ceremony and custody tomorrow.”

And with those words, my stomach sinks again. “Oh um–”

“What’s the matter?” Ai asks.

“Well, about the latter–Um…” My finger starts tapping again and I begin pacing. “I don’t know if–I’m not–I don’t think it’s a good idea for Momoko to live with me… right now… I’m not in a good place–”

“Unbelievable…” A frustrated voice mutters.

“What was that?” I ask. I could hear Ai’s voice in a sharp whisper, but her words are indiscernible. It sounds like she’s arguing with the other voice, Yusuke, I imagine.

“So sorry about that! Listen, it’s been a long night, so let's discuss this more tomorrow. OK?”

“Stop by when you start acting like a man.” Yusuke interjects.

“That’s enough out of you!” Ai snaps. The two start arguing again.

“I should go. Thank you for calling Ms. Otani.” I hang up before Ai can say anything. I lean against the wall and slam the back of my head into it. I take a smoke from my pocket and light it, blatantly ignoring the No Smoking sign. I was hoping to wait until I was off the train, but damn I needed to take the edge off.

Yusuke’s an asshole, always has been, but he’s usually right. A deadbeat father is the last thing Momoko needs. Her grandparents are better suited to raise her. I’m not ready, and I certainly wasn’t when I was 18. The speakers announce the next stop.

I get off the train in a small suburban town. This isn’t my final stop, my hometown is about a 30 minute drive from here. My plan is to stay here for the night, rent a car, then get to the town early next morning. I stop by a liquor store to buy cigarettes and resist the urge to get alcohol. After a bit of trekking, I make it to the motel. It’s nothing to write home about, and the staff are pleasant enough. I get to my room, do the bare minimum of prepwork before going to bed.

Morning came. I didn’t sleep well and my headache from yesterday hasn’t ceased at all. I take a painkiller and step outside. The cool winter air soothes my sweaty face. I light another cigarette.

After my little routine, I get dressed and head to the rental shop not too far away. I rented the cheapest car I could find, and started driving. I had forgotten how pleasant these countryside roads could be. The snow from last night had stopped, so the road is relatively smooth. The icy, snow covered trees reflecting the glow of the sunrise. I used to drive my parent’s old wagon through these roads during the summer. I’d go to the west coast with– “Suzume…” I mutter. I start tapping the wheel, rubbing my face trying to think of anything else. Still, it’s hard to believe she’s gone now.

The forest gives a long earthy groan, followed by a snapping noise, sending my attention back to the road–OH CRAP!

I slam on the brakes and the tires screech and grind against the old asphalt. The car stops as a large tree falls through the road… wait, through the road?

I get out of the car and the familiar cold air pricks my cheeks, I see there’s a fissure going straight through the road where the tree fell. I would think something this serious would get reported, but I guess this is an unpopular road. Getting a closer look, the fissure is about 10 ft wide. On top of that, it stretches through both sides of the forest, going through dense trees that look impossible to drive through.

Meaning I’ll be late. Fantastic. Now Momoko will think her father is a bum AND a flake. I stand at the edge of the pit and look down. Funny, I don’t see the tree. In fact, I don’t see anything at all. How deep is this thing, and what caused it?

A warm burst of air derails my train of thought. It’s coming up from the fissure and is strong enough to blow my hair back. I take my phone out and shine its flashlight down the pit. I still can’t see the bottom. However, I can see a purple-ish glow coming out.

This is officially freaking me out. I’ll turn back, tell Ms. Otani what happened and forget about this w’hole’ (HAHAHA) thing.

Before I realize what’s happening, a tremor shakes the earth and the ground beneath me breaks. I tumble down, dropping my phone in the chaos. I plummet down the fissure, screaming to no avail. As I fall, the purple light gets brighter, it engulfs my vision, then everything goes dark.